autistic grandson peeing pants 6 years old

[thampton]

my grandson is 6 i love the litttle guy but it kills me that i cannot comunicate better and help him more.right now he will refuse to go the the bathroom at all,will just revolt if you want him to and through fits,will pee his pants and was over that for along time now he is doing it continuosly,only not at his school-special education.he is the most loving little guy but for somereason i just cannot get him to do this regardles of the threat or what you take from him.need help if anyone has any advice.thanks
tom

[thampton]

thanks i know that is a great deal of the problem they dont seem to have the drive i have to help him,he was here last night untill 8pm peed his pants but went to the bathroom twice so to me that is aceptable -he tried hard all we can ask.i am a person who puts others before me i will do without for others especially children so any of these things hurt me ,would give my life in an instant for anyones child.

[KarenDiane]

Tom, this is a great forum to come and talk about your concerns and stresses. Everybody here knows what you are feeling. It is hard being the bad guy, and probably even harder for you because you have limited time with him. You should try to get his parents to follow your lead. Consistency will make a world of difference.

[thampton]

thanks
you know it is not only the peeing but the fits and just total refusal to listen turns away,runs,screams anything to stop comunicating,i have been thinking and probably taking away in time will work,i love the little guy so much it is hard for me to hurt him and i am his hero,we have grandpas day every saturday for years and he stays allnight we do somthing every sunday that he likes right now ice fishing,i thought i would make a chart of days of the month,have good sticker and bad and a certain number of bad and no granpa day,that would hurt me more than him but have to do somthing,these kids are tremendous strain on everyone involved,we have alot of issues with money right now with the economy serious issues and stress of our own so he is really adding to that,thanks for your advie and i will work with that,you seem lost at times so to hear from someone else is very good.tom

[KarenDiane]

I was going to suggest taking something away but you said that does not work. My daughter was 5 and still peeing and even pooping in her pants but it was when she was so absorbed in something that she refused to stop for a bathroom break. We started taking away what she was obsessed with and after a couple weeks of holy fits, she started taking bathroom breaks. With prompting of course. Maybe his special ed. teachers could give you suggestions. Good Luck.