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i would say take your cues from your daughter... if she wants to catnap during the day then let her as long as it isnt interferring with night time sleep she should be fine.
another thing you could do is talk to her pediatrician and see what he/she says about the sleeping and eating schedule..
as for the pacifier, well if she wasnt taking it at night before then it probably doesnt have much to do with anything... she probably didnt rely on it anyhow if she gave it up that easily.
and the 4:30 feed... you could always hold off until around 5... and feed her with the rest of the family at dinner... at 4 mos old you could probably prop her in a highchair and feed her baby food at the same time the family is eating... it will give her family interaction as well as a more precise dinner schedule.
these are just MY outlooks and opinions, and you are free to either take the advice or say "forget you"...lol.
Good Luck and God Bless
as for a 4:30 AM feeding... if the baby is going to sleep by 8PM and only gets up at that time, then i wouldnt worry about it... just feed her when she is hungry... OR try giving her cereal in her bottle at bedtime and see if she sleeps longer... or keep her up til 8-9pm and she SHOULD sleep longer.
good luck
and the pacifier. i heard it was easier if you took it away early but i found with my daughter that when she didnt want it she didnt take it. i dont offer it to her unless a last resort or when she naps...she spits it out as soon as she falls asleep on her own now. i wouldnt worry bout it too much until she is teething, or getting old enough to not have it