BIPOLAR AND DATING

[SilentRage]

I POSTED A SIMILAR QUESTION ABOUT THIS BUT THIS IS A LITTLE DIFFERENT. WHAT ABOUT DATING WITH A PERSON WITH THE SAME MENTAL ILLNESS AS YOU OR ANOTHER DISORDER.  DO YOU THINK THIS IS A WISE THING TO DO. NO THIS QUESTION IS NOT FOR ME. I KNOW THEY HAVE A DATING SITE FOR PEOPLE WITH MENTAL ILLNESSES, IN FACT ANOTHER POSTER POSTED THE SITE A LONG TIME AGO.

[Bear13]

I don't think it matters either way to be honest.  As long as you are honest and up front about your situation, then it really shouldn't matter.  I just started dating a WONDERFUL guy who know the medication I'm on and is COMPLETELY supportive.  Honesty always makes things work out better in the long run.  If I knew this guy was bi-polar and he was upfront with me about it, I would still feel the same way about him.  I really think it's a matter of how this person reacts to the situation, and if they are also diagnosed, how proactive they are in their own recovery.

[LetaB]

   In my opinion we with BP are drawn to one another. I've seen it happen again and again. I mean wow, they totally "get" you. This is a natural attraction - they don't have to be diagnosed. You see each other and if you can get past the looks hurdle you start talking and then you start talking faster. You are sooooo passionately into,,,,whatever and so is he! You have the same high sex drive. I'm not clear on exactly how it happens but both my ex and my boyfriend have it. My sisters both have it as do their spouses. The results of this combination vary but I will say that if that person refuses to admit that there's anything wrong with themselves or refuses to deal with it it doesn't bode well for a future.

[SilentRage]

I am so sorry about the caps didnt realize it until after that fact

[LeftCoastChick]

The last person I dated was BP, it was nice to know somone "got it", but sadly I was committed to getting better, she was committed to staying in denial. Regardless of who you date, the relationship should be based on wellness right? I know of no dating site per se for us folks. Would be nice though huh?

[jeedles]

Interesting topic. My girlfriend and i are both bipolar, on top of the fact that we're both in addiction recovery. For alot of people, i would think that this would cause alot of stress in the relationship, but it also depends on the people in the relationship. It can either be a wonderful or a horrible thing depending on how much work you put into it and how devoted you are. It's nice knowing that she understands where i'm coming from whenever i have issues with BP or my recovery, and she knows i understand from personal experience what she's going through so we have a great ability to help eachother out. But again it takes work and both people have to be willing to approach eachother on a much deeper level, which i think makes the relationship heathier and better. Right now i'm in the healthiest and i think happiest relationship i've ever had, all because we are completely honest and open with eachother, and we understand what's going on below the surface.

I can't say whether or not it would be a wise thing for you to do as it all greatly depends on the personalities of the people involved. I do know that we both took a risk knowing the consequences of what could happen if we didn't work out. The biggest thing i would suggest is that you get to know the person well before you start dating.

[jst4shanell]

If they are both committed to their recover and keeping their life together, then why not.  I could see it as a great support system.  I could also see it as a comfortable thing.  The understanding.  Or on the opposite sectrum, it could be like to drug addicts together, enabling each other and feeding each other with their illness instead of helping.  I don't know.  It's sort of a complex question.  Do you think two diabetics should be together?  they could enable each other or support each other as well.

[ILADVOCATE]

It depends to me on what is going on in the person's life. I'd rather date someone who is diagnosed and under treatment than someone who has unresolved issues in their life that later turn out to require psychiatric treatment. Unfortunately, my ex-girlfriends all fell in the latter category. I do know that a friend of mine tried to find relationships at a mood disorders support group and it did not work out because both sides were manipulating each other but I think that's the kind of people that particular group brought out. It depends to me whether someone sees themselves as a person who happens to have a psychiatric disability or an interesting collection of symptoms or totally in denial. As for anyone I'd associate with including friends I'd prefer someone who thinks with the first mindset. Regardless its not the particular mood disorder. Its whether a person is a responsible with treatment, the recovery process and has a good self awareness and all of those can be an issue.