Bipolar and living w/ an Alcoholic

I have Bipolar2 w/ very rapid cycling.  My husband is an alcoholic although he is in denial but knows he has a problem and doesnt want to stop drinking his beer.  His drinking is a big trigger for my moods.  Also, it seems like I get blamed for everything and anything, whether I do something or dont do enough of something.  My head is constantly spinning.  My mind is either racing or I'm so down in the dumps that I just want to roll up in a ball and get under my covers.  I hate living this way, but I am on SSD and cant afford to leave, plus I have a 13 yr old daughter and am trying to work things out in marital counselling.  Its bad enough that I'm having a hard time trying to figure my own self out, but I have to deal w/ his crap on top of all of my own too.
  I'm tired of everything being my fault and hearing that he does more than me in regards to everything in life.  I do truely feel somewhat "crippled" by this disease b/c I'm either hypomanic and racing, or depressed and dont want to move or go out of the house.  I feel like such a failure in my marriage and in my parenting.
Just needed to vent.....Thanks.
Jackie

[ILADVOCATE]

I would tend to think that if he is impacting on you that much then you should have the right to request that he take care of his own recovery as regards alcoholism as well. His lack of understanding of what is going on with him should not make you feel like a failure as you are following up with your recovery and he is not. You are doing the right thing as regards marital counseling but he should be respectful of you and understand which coping issues are his responsibility as well.