Comparing yourself to others

[Alex_X_18]

  this is a really nasty habit I have, espically lately. I am not really sure if this is a bipolar tendancy or just a me thing. Yes I know its not  a helthy habbit or motivation and I've been working on my sence of self and trying to be happy with who I am (becase that is really supposed to be what matters) Its a long journey but at least I've made a start... But yeah.... I still have issue with comparing myself to others feeling like I can't live up or fit in or feeling I should be more like someone else who is more stable has a better reltionship with their family or who does better in school does anyone else have this problem??

[innerchild09]

Yes I do this a lot. I always find myself wishing to be "normal" it's really hard. I always compare myself to others. And I always feel I am lower than everyone. I have low self esteem. I'm bipolar. So yes I understand how you feel I really do.

[Alex_X_18]

I think I'll beat this...I just need to keep at it and not give up...
Thanks for the replies though it helps to know I'm not alone

[Snakenstein]

I used to do that all the time when I was younger. I was VERY awkward for most of my life, until i took some time alone, and developed a personal identity. While in that awkward phrase I had extremely low self esteem, and in my eyes I was the ugliest girl that ever existed. I would constantly compare myself to others, everyone was smarter, nicer, more talented than I. I honestly didnt get over it until i left school completely. I had very few people to compare myself with, and it seemed as if once i broke the habit it went away completely, even though i do encounter people that would have made me feel that way. I think what you have to do is develop your own identity, and even if those things still get to you (they still hit me from time to time), you have to learn how to cope and just shrug them off. Because if you dont, you'll never give yourself enough credit, and realize your true potential.

Best of luck.
-Sav

[dawsohs]

hey i do that alot aswell depends what kind of a day i'm having. I have been told that i need to change my thought pattern and that i am better than anyone who thinks ill of me. I have this thing where if two girls are stood in a corner talking and looking my way then i would automatically think they are being nasty abput me. I have to change my though pattern and think oh maybe they like my new shoes and thats what they are talking about.!! Although it's hard, it needs to be done as you will get worse otherwise, you need to practice doing this and it will get better in time. Although i'm trying to help you, dont get me wrong i still have bad self esteem at the moment. I always feel that i'm not good enough or i do things wrong and i'm constantly apologising for the stupidest things that normally you wouldn't. So, i get where you are right now, and i know it's really hard.

[ILADVOCATE]

I did have a problem with low self esteem before my current recovery but as I have schizoaffective disorder I also had psychotic aspects and could in some ways not understand why people would not automatically respect me even though I realized later I was doing a lot to alienate them. However, in relatively recent times I had people who I thought of as "friends" that I did feel I had to live up to and were very hateful and antagonistic and when I acquired my physical disability disowned me and the truth was they were not as stable as I thought. I realized I had to think of who I was as a person myself and then approach others with this sense of self respect. I basically had to start over again and what I've learned is that when there is mutual respect that is the grounds for a good friendship or relationship. I have a few close friends and a relationship and things are okay with my family. The important thing is a sense of self respect but also to think of others as well. Self definition and self respect are essential but take some time to work on.