Could this be a bipolar person we are dealing with

We moved into a new area a year ago.  We have had several weird episodes with the new neighbor, some of which have been very annoying but this weekend it went further and I'm not sure how to handle it.  A neighbor down the road told my husband the lady is bipolar but frankly we didn't know if he actually meant it or not.

In the middle of the night she started pounding on our door (not knocking, pounding, most likely from the sound of it, she was beating on the glass part of the door).  While my husband was trying to get on his robe and shoes to answer the door, she came around to the side of the house and started pounding on the side door and yelling.  You know the kind of beating on the door you'd think someone was doing because your house was on fire.

Turns out the problem was dogs were barking.  We have dogs but at the time all the dogs in the neighborhood were barking (we live in the country and it is common to hear the dogs barking quite often at night, one starts and they all start).  She was enraged.  How-ever then she went from that to other things that made no sense in the middle of night to talk about after you've beat someone's door down, cussing and screaming.

The next day we noticed she sat in a room in the house, staring out a window, all day.  For several hours her husband set outside in the rain talking to her through the window.  At times we could hear her crying (we were outside working in the yard).

Does this sound like it is bipolar Disorder?  We've never dealt with it and don't know how to approach the matter.  It is frightening to think that she might do this again or worse.  I have no doubt that she would have broken the glass on the door had we not answered the door.  I wanted to call the police but didn't want to cause that much trouble with a neighbor.  Her husband came over and tried to make her go home, she wouldn't go and he kept saying he was sorry.  This ordeal lasted about an hour before she would leave.

Thanks for any advise.

[ILADVOCATE]

The person may very well have some form of psychiatric disability though only a psychiatrist could provide a diagnosis. It would be hard to say if it is bipolar or more than that though some of what you described she does can occur in bipolar. It would be worthwhile to speak to her husband and explain your concerns and perhaps he could encourage her to seek help.

[eener46]

Thank you very much. We have discussed going to her husband and asking questions.  We just hate to do it but I think at this point we need to know if this is likely to happen again, and/or if there is a medical issue because we will probably handle it better if we know there is something behind the behavior.

[Athena_M]

Barking dogs are annoying!  It does not matter if she has bipolar or not.  Get those dogs in the house!
People with bipolar have difficulty sleeping which leads to mania and depression.  
If I was losing sleep because of someone's dogs, I would get enraged too.  Crying is normal for someone who has had little sleep, especially someone who may have bipolar.  

[eener46]

I live in the country, I don't have to have my dogs in the house, and there is no noise ordinance and the whole neighborhood has dogs outside, in their yards.

IF I knew that she had a problem (as I stated above), I'd be willing to see what I can do.  We don't live in town, my house is not on top of hers, there is distance.

If you get enraged and beat someones door down, not knock on the door, not ever mention a problem in the light of day, when you see the people almost daily.. I'm assuming you have another issue and asked the question to figure it out, not to be told that someone elses problem is my fault.    

[eener46]

I forgot to mention in the last post, as I mentioned in the first post, this is not the first thing, it is a list of things involving her behavior, this was the latest.

The people who lived here before us, said she used to come and put their animals out of the pen and go in the barn, and have fights with the ladies husband because she thought it should be ok that she was in their barn, letting their animals lose and a list of things (didn't know that before we bought our place, though).

She has come to our door and demanded to see our ID's and know where we worked, not asking, demanding.  She will pull her car across our yard and up to our front door, and tell us she is going to use our barn, whether we want her to or not.  She is that arrogant and aggressive on ocassion.

After one of these run ins, we usually won't see her for several days.  Then she seems different, never mentions what happens and things are fine for awhile......

    

[yarrow]

While it is true that coming onto your property without permission and making demands of you is not only weird but probably illegal, it is also true that the fact that "the whole neighborhood has dogs outside, in their yards" does not make hte barking of all those dogs less irritating to someone who's in a bad way, physically or emotionally, and may be having trouble sleeping.  Do barking dogs actually add beauty to the night?

There are legal means to keep her from coming onto your property, if that is your major concern.  Most attorneys would be able to advise you.

[Athena_M]

From you saying you could see inside her window and saw her crying, I thought you lived very close to her in proximity.  
Having her drive up on your property is wrong.  Maybe your neighbor is right that she has bipolar.  
I would handle the situation delicately.  If you call the police it could cause further problems, but if you call the police they may have her hospitalized.  
Maybe she is not taking her medicine.  
She sounds off balance.  As I mentioned earlier bipolar symptoms will manifest themselves more when one has a lack of sleep.  
Even if it is not a requirement and there are other dogs in the area, I would put the dogs inside just to keep the peace.  

[eener46]

The room she was in faces our yard, being that her husband was standing outside the window talking to her and you could hear her crying, we noticed her in the window.  Otherwise, we'd never have known she was there.  We went in the house because we felt like we were intruding but hours later when we had to finish what we were doing, they were still there.

I understand dogs barking can be annoying to anyone, including myself and maybe I don't explain it well, if this had been the only thing that had happened we would believe that it really was the dogs barking that got her upset but it doesn't excuse the manner in which she approached it.  Her other neighbor also had dogs barking and is as close to her house as we are, she will not go there because he has already threatened to call the police (most of what surrounds us is farm land, cattle farms, in front and back of our properties, coyotes are coming out, the dogs barking right now is probably directly related to the coyotes and actually our farmer neighbors will go out in the fields if the dogs get to barking too bad, making sure calves aren't being attacked).  

There is a pattern of extreme behavior that seems to come and go and we don't want to call the police, that is why I didn't but I'm not sure I'll feel that way if anything else happens like this. I've been angry before and I understand anger but in 46 years of living, I've never heard anyone beat on a door that way, she was not mad, she was truely livid and enraged and that rage extended to her husband.  I have listed some things she has done but not some because I feel like I'm invading her privacy by even mentioning it but I need to understand it, which is my purpose in posing the question, to at least have some understanding of the bahavior.  I also wondered after reading some about it, if she quits taking her med's from time to time.  I read that people will start believing they are ok and quit taking the medication.  

We intend to live here the rest of our lives and would like to get along with the neighbors.  She seems like a nice lady half of the time but it is scary to wonder if it could get worse, I mean we don't know her that well and after one confrontation that bad, we are wondering what next, could it get worse? I believe if my husband hadn't got to the door when he did, she may have tried to kick it in.  

[Athena_M]

Yes alot of people with bipolar will go off of their medicine.  
I know personally it is hard to deal with a bad neighbor.  I too, bought this house hoping to live here all of our lives.  We also have a neighbor that sometimes makes it hard to enjoy our house.  
I think your neighbor was probably at her wits end.  Who knows how many nights the dog barking has disrupted her sleep.  
I know that you say your house is not near by, but sometimes the way buildings are there can be an echo.  
We lived down the street from a vet clinic and sometimes we could hear all the dogs barking because the sound was bouncing off some of the buildings.  Even though it was down the street, it sounded like it was right nearby.  
I know it is scary wondering what could happen next.  
I do have to admit that one time ten years ago, under my doctor's supervision,  I was off my medicine.  I had a University Professor coming to my work that day and someone parked right in front of my garage.  I went to the manager of the property and kept knocking and knocking on her door to help me find out who parked there.  I remember her saying to me what you said, that I should not be pounding on the door that hard unless there was a fire.  
I would just try to keep the peace with her.  I know it is probably difficult to bring the dogs in for the night, but maybe you can try one of those Bark Off gadgets that does not harm dogs but keeps them from barking.