Do I go back on Medication

[hell1971]

My doctor took me off my main medication " to see what would happen " she has left me on the minimum dose of lamotrigine and stopped the Ziprazadone. It has been about 4 weeks, the first two weeks I was in a panic, scared and having some withdrawal symptoms. Now the last couple of weeks I am mainly depressed, i am having some moments of light but they are minimal, fake it until you make it is what i am doing, merely exsisting. Do I go back on meds, take the side effects and be a blah person i became, not really fully operational but better than this but full of anxiety or do i see how it goes, enjoy the few moments of pleasure and just put on a brave face but undernieth hate myself and what i stand for at the moment, hope that things dont get so bad that i just want to give up. im due to see her on monday and i think she will put my on olanzapine if i let her, which i do not want to go on due to the weight gain and sedation, i have lost 18/19kgs before i came off meds and I dont want to put it back on. I have conficting advise from friends and family, my husband wants me back on meds as he fears what i may do! even though i have never done anything that bad in the past, the doctors have scared him into thinking i will top over the edge and put the family into financial ruin and end up in hospital so i dont think i can take his opinion to be in the best interest for me. I have one friend who sees the light back in me that she said was missing when i was medicated but she does not know how depressed i am when the light is not shining, my other friend sees the depression and what it has done to me the last few weeks and thinks maybe i should go back onto meds.
I have no idea, I think i was better on meds, not maybe 100% but i was definatley more consistant in my mood and able to acheive more regular things, i still had depression on and off but i was able to pick myself up and do some positive things in my life and i think i was getting better. But saying that I dont miss the anxiety/panic attacks and the sedation not really feeling like life was great. Any advise?

[Shippe13]

If you are realizing that you had more of a life on meds, I would talk to your doctor about getting you back on the meds. If there was a specific reason why you can't be on the meds that she took you off of, there may be different medication that you can take. I take Invega, Lamictal, Trazadone, and Zoloft. I, too, can not afford to gain any weight... and have not since I started taking these medications.  
It may take a while, but as long as you are open with your doctor about everything that you have been feeling it will all work out. I use the mood tracker and I can't wait to bring it back to my pdoc. I didn't realize how drastic my mood changes from day to day. So, I suppose the answer to your question is yes, I believe that it is a good idea to be on meds. Oh.... and- I just started taking vitamins B-12, D3, and omega-3 fatty acids... and I am starting to feel pretty good. (I read somewhere that those vitamins are great for depression) Good Luck!  

[babybonita]

I know exactly how you feel. I always thought that the meds made me tired & foggy & didn't help my anxiety much. Now being on less medication I realise its a bigger hell. Its like I can't win. I guess I'm looking for that just right feeling & its not going to happen. Do what feels right for you. Maybe try a new Med cocktail that wont leave u so blah!