Do you ever feel restless? I do a lot. I feel like I need to be doing something but there is nothing I want to work on. I know I have paperwork to do for our mystery shopping business (we only do a few shops a month) but I just can't make myself do it. I am so behind, I have to do paperwork for all of August!
I also feel useless. My doctors tell me I can't work and in my brain I know it is true, but I still feel useless. I am on disability. I know I need it, they just reviewed my case and approved it so I know they find me disabled.
I feel like I hold my husband back. When we go to church I have to leave early because of my agoraphobia. He has to stay home with me so I don't try to hurt myself.
I don't know what I am asking, I guess I just need some support right now.
Thanks for listening.
I feel restless a lot. I feel restless but I can't do anything. I just feel like I'm moving very fast but I can't even keep up with myself and I feel frozen and tired at the same time. I think of things to do then I forget them suddenly. Or, I think of things to do but I just can't motivate myself to do them. I feel like I'm doing 10,000 things but really I do nothing. It is confusing, even for me. Like I said, I feel frozen and racing at the same time.
I think maybe if you are worried about your husband you should talk to him about it. Find out how he is really feeling. Perhaps he does not feel held back. Perhaps he just loves you and wants to make sure you're okay. If he does feel there is a problem maybe you can go together to talk to your doctor. Or he can see a therapist, too. He just needs to care for himself, too.
There are means to transition from SSDI back to work. Go to the Social Security website itself SSA.gov. Motor restlessness can often be an aspect of bipolar and anxiety attacks as well but there could be multiple issues going on. It might be a good idea to go to a support group and see if there could be activities that might help you to become more socially engaged.
Sounds like you could benifit by a pdoc appt. and maybe some talk therapy to get a handle on the guilt.
I know that for me it is important that I have a recovery health plan, one that does not enclude my husband but improves our relationship.
A BP support is a great place to go to learn some new life skills to go with this new life of yours.
Meds alone for me are not enough, I have had to learn where my limits are... and when to push my way through some stumbling blocks....sometime I can and others oh well I'll try again next time.
Try not to be so hard on yourself, negative self talk only worsens things. Try to be good to yourself
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