Introvert vs extrovert

[Bubulous]

Being bipolar it seems sometimes that you have no choice whether you are an introvert or an extrovert.  When you are depressed you are going to be an introvert.  You are gong to hide in your shell trying to gather energy so you can get back out there and live.  That is the way I like to imagine my depression.  I like to think that when I am depressed all I am doing is gathering energy so I can explode back out into the world and do amazing things.
Right now I am going to choose to be an introvert.  Not because I am depressed but in fact because I am not depressed.  I want to see if my climax has really been reached.
If I live to be 70 than I am exactly at the half way mark.  I have been on some amazing adventures and I have learned some of the big secrets of the world.  Now what I wonder?  Everything I have read says that I need to give back.  That I need to pass on the things I have learned or be in some sort of service to the world and in a sense I agree but I have been visioning the wrong way.
Bless the internet for being around because it gives me an advantage.  It allows me to give back and also be an introvert.  I love Medhelp for this reason.

[Crystal413]

My personality is introverted. BUT, when I am Manic or Hypomanic I will talk to absuletely everyone. Extroverted to the max and I'm just as pleasant as can be.

[LachrymaPapaveris]

I can't seem to face up to the facts, i'm tense and nervous and I can't relax. I cant sleep cause my heads on fire. Don't touch me i'm a real lifewiiiirree!

Okay, sorry that was the first thought that popped into my head. Possibly not even related to this. I suppose I am a lot more extroverted when I am manic? I mean I haven't been in years, this is the first time in YEARS, and I thought I could use my (very stubborn) willpower to fight this. But i'm afraid, the more the hours pass the more I feel like i'm slipping into a state I can't control. This worries me. Its like i'm being strapped in to the first roller coaster at the theme park, and i'm scared because I do not know exactly what will happen next, all I know is i'm already in for the ride.  

[weaver71]

I had to think about this one awhile to respond. Having returned back to my old ways of coping, thinking of mania as inspiration and depression as empathy, I am doing the opposite of "going against the grain" of my mind. I am actually trying to nurture it. When I feel I need time alone, I spend time alone, when I feel I need to be social, I am social. I guess this goes back to my original decision to change my world to fit my mind rather than changing my mind to fit the world. When I feel something strong, I sit and ask myself what that feeling is motivating me to change. Even if I can't change it right then, putting my feeling into 'thoughts' of action help me maintain some perspective. I am not resisting at all, accept when I feel I am reaching psychotic levels of mania, then I spend some time alone, though my being wants me to go out to the circus and be the star of the Big Tent.

So, it appears I am juggling between introvert and extrovert, never allowing myself to go too far either way, but allowing them to be. I suppose I have set up some responsibilities that force me to interact with people on a regular basis, no matter how I feel. I am allowed to feel withdrawn or gregarious, but I have to have those feelings around other people. I think giving up on some balance is behind me, I am just trying not to go to far in or out of myself. No longer hiding my moods has helped a lot too.

You got me a thinking Bubby, nothing new there. It was good for me to think about this.

[gypsydi]

I seem to not wanting to be in the public. I am afraid of judgment. I feel I can't  have ay more close relationship, because I hurt and drain so many people.

[Bubulous]

It definitely makes us stronger to go against the grain.  Although the brain is not a muscle there is something to be said about fighting your symptoms when you are in a slump and avoiding manic evoking behavior when you start spinning up.
I still do those things and over the last few months I have had the hardest battle of my life with depression.  It has not been the worst depression I have ever had but it seemed as though all of the tools that had worked in the past for fighting depression were not working anymore.  I still fought though and through the fight learned some things.
I still get out everyday.  As a matter of fact I have started a group with some of my family in order to have talks every morning that we can in order to discuss what may be on our minds.
I have to say now that I am proud of myself for the work that I have done over the last few months and am amazed that some days I was even able to get out of the bed.
Thank you quietgirl for your comment.  I hope that all is well in your world.  It is nice having you around :)

[thatquietgirl]

I think you still have a choice to be an introvert or extrovert even within episodes.  You may have to force it one way or the other depending on the episode, but doing so in the correct direction depending on episode type does actually help you work through symptoms and episodes faster, I find.  My therapist actually encourages me to work against the illness.  Get out there and be around people when I'm depressed, limit stimulation when manic.  It's been really sound advice, even if difficult to do at times.  She has encouraged me to embrace myself where I am, though, and accept that I won't be able to always make myself go against the grain, that my best is what it is on a given day and no more or no less

But good for you deciding what you want to do and finding the purpose you want for your life!