Irrational or excessive guilt

[compnet]

Hello,

What is the problem of guilt all about?  I don't mean normal guilt, like you hurt somebody, and of course you have guilt and sorrow later.  I mean times where memories of the past will come on, stuff already talked out, that will come to memory, followed by more memories, and they make you feel terrible and guilty, and self-blaming.

I suppose it could be from being raised with people that put others down.

I read it can be a symptom of depression.

I find it strange.  Personally, I'll have it come on ocassionally for a limited amount of time.  And it's such a weight.  When the memories come, I'm not sure what to think of them or what to do.  I wouldn't do the same as I did then, but that's history and can't be changed.  I've talked though the issues.  Yet the memories still give guilt when I remember them.  I know I need more mercy on myself.  It makes me wonder if it's a neurotransmitter issue, since it comes on seemingly without my willing it, and it's brief.

Any thoughts?

[Athena_M]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me.  Using the term "obsessive" about the feelings of guilt, helps me realize that my times of feeling guilty are obsessive.
Wow, when you shared about a family member with bipolar that was a teacher it was almost exactly identical to somethings I had been through. I used to teach also and would think the same way as your family member.  
I have a tendency to think and analaze and ruminate about past decisions and mistakes I made when I was suicidal or when I was manic.  I act out of character when I am not on medication, so it is hard to accept because I normally hold myself up to high standards.  

[ILADVOCATE]

I find it specifically occurs when I have thoughts that are obsessive and those can be part of mood episodes as well and the two overlap (or in my situation psychosis since I have schizoaffective disorder although that is less of a problem these days as I am on a treatment that has brought that into "relative remission").
   Actually a family member with bipolar had strong feelings of guilt during episodes of depression that would keep them up at night. They actually had done nothing wrong but fixated on what could have been done, that is they had worked in the past as a teacher in a neighborhood where the children were poor and did a lot to help them but kept thinking what else could have been done. I reminded them they did the best they could and much of what was happening was beyond one person to address and rather than focus on what could have been done in the past to think of what could be done in the future and to try to think of more pragmatic goal oriented ways of approaching things. Now of course they discuss all this with their therapist and they are seeing a psychiatrist and will be starting medication as well as with the depressive aspect of bipolar, feelings of guilt can occur on their own and as part of a cluster of symptoms when they occur without any specific reason and do respond to treatment.

[Athena_M]

I understand how you feel about guilt.  When I get plagued by guilt, I ruminate and keep trying to find out why I did what I did.  I get the bad memories in my head and can't seem to let it go.  
I read something interesting that you could look up.  Feelings of guilt are usually because of a B 12 deficiency.  Your doctor could do a blood test for you.  Just don't take too much if you have bipolar because it makes me manic.  
I like to get my B 12 by eating cereal that is fortified with it.  
Good luck to you.  

[compnet]

I just came across some helpful information:

Dealing with a feeling of guilt responsibly and constructively – Workshop Topics
When you feel guilty (responsible), you can clarify the situation for yourself, and make it more manageable using the following exercise which consists of posing and answering four questions:

1. What makes me feel guilty - responsible?

2. What value do I feel I have violated?

3. What am I asking myself to do to fulfill this value?

4. What is it I really need to do to fulfill this value?
Dawncoveabbey


"The root of irrational guilt is—wait ’till you hear this—self-centeredness."
CBN