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Postpartum Depression, Bipolar, Both? Help.
I am 21 years old, have a 7 month old daughter and am pregnant with a second baby. I have been under a copious amount of stress the past few months.
I went through a depressive state that had lasted roughly 3 weeks, did not want to do anything, had no motivation at all. I was going through the motions of every day life simply because I had to for my daughter. Then out of nowhere, things got better for me. I felt great. On top of the world. Nothing could bring me down. I had more energy, was constantly doing things, talking to people non stop. I was happy, smiling and laughing. And now, I am in a depressive state again. I have zero energy, I want to sleep all day, I barely clean anything unless I have to, I don't want to interact with anyone, just want to be left alone completely. Everything that is going on right now, is my fault. It's my fault my daughters dad is an ******* and is barely around, my daughter even hates me. I resent everyone around because they don't have to go through what I do.
I become extremely irritated very easily. Stupid little things **** me off. I also become really angry just as easily. And often, I hit, bite or hit other objects... I don't know why, it just happens. I cry at random times. That's my current situation.
I am a very creative person, but I cannot stick to one thing, I often start projects with big ideas but they are never finished. I love to spend money. I go through stages with my sex drive. Sometimes I find sex disgusting, and other times, it's all I want. I can be really reckless at times, completely not myself. I am a good natured person, and I have had sex with 3 random guys and was paid to suck a guys ****. I don't know why I did it, I'm not like that. My mind races all the time, a lot of the time I have to stop myself and go back just to reorder my thoughts again.
I am going to seek help. Should I approach my doctor about depression? Bipolar Disorder? Or both?
Thanks for any help.
I went through a depressive state that had lasted roughly 3 weeks, did not want to do anything, had no motivation at all. I was going through the motions of every day life simply because I had to for my daughter. Then out of nowhere, things got better for me. I felt great. On top of the world. Nothing could bring me down. I had more energy, was constantly doing things, talking to people non stop. I was happy, smiling and laughing. And now, I am in a depressive state again. I have zero energy, I want to sleep all day, I barely clean anything unless I have to, I don't want to interact with anyone, just want to be left alone completely. Everything that is going on right now, is my fault. It's my fault my daughters dad is an ******* and is barely around, my daughter even hates me. I resent everyone around because they don't have to go through what I do.
I become extremely irritated very easily. Stupid little things **** me off. I also become really angry just as easily. And often, I hit, bite or hit other objects... I don't know why, it just happens. I cry at random times. That's my current situation.
I am a very creative person, but I cannot stick to one thing, I often start projects with big ideas but they are never finished. I love to spend money. I go through stages with my sex drive. Sometimes I find sex disgusting, and other times, it's all I want. I can be really reckless at times, completely not myself. I am a good natured person, and I have had sex with 3 random guys and was paid to suck a guys ****. I don't know why I did it, I'm not like that. My mind races all the time, a lot of the time I have to stop myself and go back just to reorder my thoughts again.
I am going to seek help. Should I approach my doctor about depression? Bipolar Disorder? Or both?
Thanks for any help.
That's great that you're keeping a journal. Make sure to list your moods in it as well so you can see if you're jumping all over the place or swinging slowly or whatever you end up doing.
First generation antipsychotics are the older ones, including haldol, thorazine, fluphenazine, mellaril, stelazine, etc. A lot of them were discovered in the 50s, and were the original treatments for schizophrenia, and some were the first things other than lithium approved for bipolar (antipsychotics, for the most part, help with mood stabilization in addition to dealing with psychosis and hallucinations). They're called first generation because we now have second generation, or atypical, antipsychotics like olanzapine, seroquel, geodon, risperidone, abilify (which is sometimes listed as a third generation AP), etc. The issue with these is that there really aren't any good studies out there with them and pregnancy, so we just don't know. They also have a risk of causing diabetes and weight gain, and can increase the chances of gestational diabetes (diabetes during pregnancy).
The problem with first generation APs is that they're a bit more likely to cause movement disorders, although the risk is pretty low overall. They're less likely than the atypicals to cause weight gain, so it's a trade-off.
At least you don't have as long to go before having your treatment options open as you could, since you're in the third trimester. Breastfeeding might be complicated, but if you talk to a good lactation counselor, they should be able to help you with which meds are ok.
First generation antipsychotics are the older ones, including haldol, thorazine, fluphenazine, mellaril, stelazine, etc. A lot of them were discovered in the 50s, and were the original treatments for schizophrenia, and some were the first things other than lithium approved for bipolar (antipsychotics, for the most part, help with mood stabilization in addition to dealing with psychosis and hallucinations). They're called first generation because we now have second generation, or atypical, antipsychotics like olanzapine, seroquel, geodon, risperidone, abilify (which is sometimes listed as a third generation AP), etc. The issue with these is that there really aren't any good studies out there with them and pregnancy, so we just don't know. They also have a risk of causing diabetes and weight gain, and can increase the chances of gestational diabetes (diabetes during pregnancy).
The problem with first generation APs is that they're a bit more likely to cause movement disorders, although the risk is pretty low overall. They're less likely than the atypicals to cause weight gain, so it's a trade-off.
At least you don't have as long to go before having your treatment options open as you could, since you're in the third trimester. Breastfeeding might be complicated, but if you talk to a good lactation counselor, they should be able to help you with which meds are ok.
I have started writing a daily journal to record thoughts and actions that happen throughout the day (trying to keep up with it) to be able to reference it to my doctor. Thank you, I will also bring up CBT, and get his thoughts on that as well. I really do think some form of therapy will be beneficial to me.
I'm almost at a week on Remeron 15mg, just taking things day by day. I've heard it can take anywhere from a week to 4 weeks to take full effect.
What do you mean by first generation antipsychotics?
And I am in the 3rd trimester, 30 weeks as of this Friday.
I'm almost at a week on Remeron 15mg, just taking things day by day. I've heard it can take anywhere from a week to 4 weeks to take full effect.
What do you mean by first generation antipsychotics?
And I am in the 3rd trimester, 30 weeks as of this Friday.
Definitely tell your doctor about your worries about bipolar and the violent impulses. Depending on how bad the impulses are and if they've gotten worse from starting the Remeron, they might want to stop it and try something else. They might also have some cognitive behavioral techniques to help you with those, and CBT in general might be good for you (CBT + meds has been shown to be better in the long run than either separately).
The carb and sugar cravings are a known side effect, so try to keep that in mind when you feel like eating them, and maybe try diet drinks or fruits or eating a large salad to fill you up.
You have to be patient with antidepressants, since they can sometimes take a while to take effect. With Remeron, one source I read said a week or two at 15 mg, and if it's not working by then it's time for a dose increase.
Pregnancy is really tricky when it comes to medications for psychiatric conditions. Most of them are category C (including Remeron), which means there isn't evidence either way in humans about birth defects and that there may be some evidence of birth defects in animal models. Lamotrigine (Lamictal) looks like one of the better choices for bipolar (and it's especially good for the depressive phase), although some sources I found suggested first generation antipsychotics. How far along you are also matters, since some things are most dangerous in the first trimester and less so later on. Do you know how far along your pregnancy is?
The carb and sugar cravings are a known side effect, so try to keep that in mind when you feel like eating them, and maybe try diet drinks or fruits or eating a large salad to fill you up.
You have to be patient with antidepressants, since they can sometimes take a while to take effect. With Remeron, one source I read said a week or two at 15 mg, and if it's not working by then it's time for a dose increase.
Pregnancy is really tricky when it comes to medications for psychiatric conditions. Most of them are category C (including Remeron), which means there isn't evidence either way in humans about birth defects and that there may be some evidence of birth defects in animal models. Lamotrigine (Lamictal) looks like one of the better choices for bipolar (and it's especially good for the depressive phase), although some sources I found suggested first generation antipsychotics. How far along you are also matters, since some things are most dangerous in the first trimester and less so later on. Do you know how far along your pregnancy is?
It's been 4 days since taking the antidepressant and I have already noticed a carb/sugar craving. It has also affected my dreams, not much. Just in the sense that I am remembering dreams now. It is also making me super drowsy, which I have heard is common and the daytime drowsiness should subside.
I have not mentioned about Bipolar yet, but I will bring it up at my next appointment. I am going on a week to week basis to see how the medication affects me.
I do want to breastfeed so I will also be mentioning that as the time gets closer to find something that works for me and is safe for my baby.
Other than that, I have not noticed any significant changes. I am becoming more and more frustrated and I often have violent impulses. I am doing my best to control them, but it is hard.
I have not mentioned about Bipolar yet, but I will bring it up at my next appointment. I am going on a week to week basis to see how the medication affects me.
I do want to breastfeed so I will also be mentioning that as the time gets closer to find something that works for me and is safe for my baby.
Other than that, I have not noticed any significant changes. I am becoming more and more frustrated and I often have violent impulses. I am doing my best to control them, but it is hard.
There is a new comment but it won't allow me to view it. :/ the last comment I see is from June 04th.
I have not, but I've heard it can be very effective. Be on the lookout for carb and straight sugar cravings (it's supposed to be a fairly common side effect). Since you're pregnant, it'll be harder to track your weight gain to see if it's normal or too much, so try to stick to a good diet. I've heard it can affect dreams, but usually not in a bad way, and that it helps you sleep.
After you have the baby, breastfeeding is the best way to lose weight. You'll need to make sure that the meds are safe with that, but pumping and discarding is better than nothing, because you will be literally sucking calories out of your body in liquid form. Breastfeeding is also good for babies' immune systems. Anyway, that's a ways away, but it's a good thing to know.
Did you ask the doctor about bipolar? As a rule, bipolar people should not take antidepressants without a mood stabilizer on board, although pregnancy makes it much more complicated. If you are bipolar, you should think about adding a mood stabilizer after giving birth.
After you have the baby, breastfeeding is the best way to lose weight. You'll need to make sure that the meds are safe with that, but pumping and discarding is better than nothing, because you will be literally sucking calories out of your body in liquid form. Breastfeeding is also good for babies' immune systems. Anyway, that's a ways away, but it's a good thing to know.
Did you ask the doctor about bipolar? As a rule, bipolar people should not take antidepressants without a mood stabilizer on board, although pregnancy makes it much more complicated. If you are bipolar, you should think about adding a mood stabilizer after giving birth.
I have seen a doctor for the depression and since I am pregnant, I have been prescribed Mirtazapine. (Also known as Remeron). Has anyone used this anti depressant before?
I am concerned about how you view your daughter. A 7 month old child does NOT hate anyone. They may have learned to fear someone but not hate.
Good I just noticed the dates on these post. I am glad that you sought out help. Because, if the symptoms went untreated it really could have became harmful for you and your child
Please contact your doctor right away, go to the nearest emergency room and let them know that you have considered harming yourself or your child. They will get you the help that you need. You might just need some coping skills and some help with your daughter. Maybe even just some rest, but you must get help as soon as possible those thoughts are not good at all.
I think you should ask your doctor to write a referral to a behavior health clinic, and tell the doctor about all of your symptoms and feelings just as you shared with us.
Does the father at least pay child support? If he doesn't, going to court (with some help from social services or something) to make him should make your life a little easier in the future from a financial standpoint.
Ask your doctor about bipolar--it won't hurt. Bipolar comes with depression, and in some forms of bipolar, it's the depression that's the main symptom/problem (while having a manic episode is the criterion for bipolar, it is extremely rare for someone with bipolar to not be depressed at some points). So while both bipolar disorder and major depressive disorder involve depression, the treatment, especially when it comes to antidepressants, is different for bipolar and it's really important to screen for. You being pregnant right now does complicate things, both because medications do have some risk in pregnancy, and because hormones can wreak havoc with your moods. The decision about whether or not to start medication while pregnant is one that you and your psychiatrist will need to make, based on the risks of medications to the baby and the risks to you and the baby of not being medicated. A risk to the fetus might be outweighed by the need for you to stay sane and take care of yourself and your daughter. Luckily, you're past the very beginning of pregnancy, which is when a fetus is at the most risk from drugs or toxins.
Ask your doctor about bipolar--it won't hurt. Bipolar comes with depression, and in some forms of bipolar, it's the depression that's the main symptom/problem (while having a manic episode is the criterion for bipolar, it is extremely rare for someone with bipolar to not be depressed at some points). So while both bipolar disorder and major depressive disorder involve depression, the treatment, especially when it comes to antidepressants, is different for bipolar and it's really important to screen for. You being pregnant right now does complicate things, both because medications do have some risk in pregnancy, and because hormones can wreak havoc with your moods. The decision about whether or not to start medication while pregnant is one that you and your psychiatrist will need to make, based on the risks of medications to the baby and the risks to you and the baby of not being medicated. A risk to the fetus might be outweighed by the need for you to stay sane and take care of yourself and your daughter. Luckily, you're past the very beginning of pregnancy, which is when a fetus is at the most risk from drugs or toxins.
Thank you. My kiddos are going to be 11 months apart and that's a huge stressor for me. I am so worried about what is going to happen. I'm a single mom, and the father does nothing to help. He knows my situation and I am still doing everything completely on my own. Things don't seem to be looking up for me, and really I can only see things getting worse from here.
I'm just unsure whether to approach a doctor first about the depression or my thoughts about bipolar? I know they can go hand in hand sometimes and I am concerned about taking anti depressants right now as I have heard its possible to enter in a manic state... And with me being pregnant, I don't want to be in a manic phase. I don't know if there is truth to that, its just something I have read.
I'm just unsure whether to approach a doctor first about the depression or my thoughts about bipolar? I know they can go hand in hand sometimes and I am concerned about taking anti depressants right now as I have heard its possible to enter in a manic state... And with me being pregnant, I don't want to be in a manic phase. I don't know if there is truth to that, its just something I have read.
My brother and myself are one year apart so mum suffered so much when I was born to the point where she was hospitalised for wanting to end her life. She had major depression which then led to bipolar. I would definitely get treatment as the environment you are currently in does not help your young daughter. It is not safe nor healthy.
You can take medication and to help yourself.....it is so unfair to go through what you are going through and not there to enjoy the special times with your daughter; her first words, her first steps, etc........
You can take medication and to help yourself.....it is so unfair to go through what you are going through and not there to enjoy the special times with your daughter; her first words, her first steps, etc........
Please do, if you haven't already. I think your life and your daughter's life will be a lot better in the long run if you get help now.
I have seeked help. It's been recommended I be admitted for a brief period of time so I can be assessed and meet with a physcratrist because I am displaying red flags and do need some form of help.
Do you have any family members who can take her for a while? It sounds like you're too stressed at the moment. And you clearly need help, and probably medications. When you're at the point of wanting/trying to hurt yourself and others, you need meds. They might want an inpatient stay to stabilize you, but for your sake and your daughter's sake, if that's what you need, then it will be worth it. A family member of mine works with people with moderate to profound mental retardation, and some of them over the years have been people who were born normal, but their overstressed mothers snapped and threw them against the wall or hit them, causing permanent brain damage requiring institutionalization.
If you call social services/department of child welfare, they may be able to help, possibly with foster care for a while while you get yourself back together. And if your family or friends can step in to help you cope with all the stresses of being a single mom, now is the time to cash in on those relationships. Please get help now, explain to your doctor that you need an urgent appointment to deal with this ASAP.
If you call social services/department of child welfare, they may be able to help, possibly with foster care for a while while you get yourself back together. And if your family or friends can step in to help you cope with all the stresses of being a single mom, now is the time to cash in on those relationships. Please get help now, explain to your doctor that you need an urgent appointment to deal with this ASAP.
My morning began okay. Then my mood turned horrible and I became violent. Self harming and wanting to harm my daughter. I've put her in the crib and walked away. It's not fair. I feel terrible. I'm not a proper mother. No one should ever want to harm their child. I feel so trapped by her though. I no longer have a life due to being a single mom. I hate feeling this. I love my daughter, I know I do. But I can't control my thoughts. :( I don't want to be a mom. :'( I don't know how to handle this anymore.
The hormones can't be helping, but I think you should ask your doctor for a referral to a psychiatrist to talk about bipolar. The psychiatrist is better qualified than a GP to make a proper diagnosis. Make sure you get them to schedule you for a long appointment so that you have time to talk about everything. You could also see a psychologist about maybe getting diagnosed.
I am the same way with creativity--I want to do all these different things, start some of them, then lose steam and never finish. Or can't even choose which thing to start. I've also had the up and down sexual desire, between asexual and even "sex is gross" to wanting sex multiple times a day. I haven't gone crazy with random hookups/getting paid for sex, though, and that sounds like mania, since the decision doesn't make any sense in retrospect/you weren't yourself. I mostly have depressive mood episodes, with much shorter hypomania (I have BP II). Your depressive episodes sound like classic depressive episodes, but major depression and bipolar overlap in the depression phase, making them hard to distinguish if you're not manic. But you have some major mania red flags.
Given your young age and the combination of symptoms, I'd say it's a definite possibility, and you clearly need help for the state you're in right now no matter what the diagnosis ends up being. Best of luck.
I am the same way with creativity--I want to do all these different things, start some of them, then lose steam and never finish. Or can't even choose which thing to start. I've also had the up and down sexual desire, between asexual and even "sex is gross" to wanting sex multiple times a day. I haven't gone crazy with random hookups/getting paid for sex, though, and that sounds like mania, since the decision doesn't make any sense in retrospect/you weren't yourself. I mostly have depressive mood episodes, with much shorter hypomania (I have BP II). Your depressive episodes sound like classic depressive episodes, but major depression and bipolar overlap in the depression phase, making them hard to distinguish if you're not manic. But you have some major mania red flags.
Given your young age and the combination of symptoms, I'd say it's a definite possibility, and you clearly need help for the state you're in right now no matter what the diagnosis ends up being. Best of luck.
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