Sorry guys, a womanly problem lol

[wj74]

Does anyone else have this problem? So, I'm forced to get my tubes tied/cut, whatever they do now. I have kids and I'm done. The thought of getting pregnant scares the crap outta me. I'd have to stop the Abilify and I think I'd end up in the psych ward. Really. I can't do the pill, or anything hormonal because, uh, they make me Satan. I tried the Mirena IUD too and that made me so depressed. I never fully came back from that, even after I had it removed. The other methods cause problems too and that's too much information so I'll leave that up to your imaginations. This is relavent here because I think the bipolar is what makes the hormones no good for me... so I have to go under the knife. I'm skeered. I've only had a hernia repaired before so surgery is def. not my thing. Ugh.

[wj74]

Thank you. :) I have a pre-op appoointment on Friday.

[zzzmykids]

Oh, I made it sound like I didn't want more than the two. Actually we wanted the four.
My fertility specialist said my husband had to get the snip because I had been through enough surgeries and if I got pregnant again, I had a 75 percent chance of dying. So he did and he said he would never do it...but faced with the odds he did it.
He was 29, Then me at 33/34 we are both unics!!!!!!!!! We "adopted" other peoples orphaned children that were the friends of our girls and still call them our kids.
You will be fine wj and so will your family.
zzzmykids

[zzzmykids]

Don't be scared. It is reversible most of the time if you decide to change back.
I had my first ectopic pregnancy at 24/nine weeks along, lost tube, pregnancy and ovary. Had one child already. Ten days after that one was removed I was pregnant with my now 27 year old just married daughter. At 27, I had my second ectopic pregnancy, found out from the fertility specialist that I should not have ever conceived ANY of the babies! Back when we first were married I tried different birth controls and like you they made we crazy, cranky and  ready to take someones head off.
At 33/34ish had the whole kitandcaboodle ripped out because of continuing problems. Nine months later, I felt like a new woman. If I could have convinced a doctor to do it before I started having life threatening problems I would have had it out right after second child!!!!!!! It's better without birth control. It will be the scope proceedure and within six weeks you will be thinking, I am FREEEEEEEEE, Yippeeeeee!

Good luck with the proceedure and enjoy your new found freedom.
zzzmykids

[wj74]

Well, it might not be as easy as "just" the tubal, they will probably need to reopen my belly button hernia to get in there. So that kind of *****. Why didn't I just get it done back then?

[RJ233]

I had my tubes done years ago. Many years ago they tied them. Mine were cut and cauterized. I would imagine that is still what they do. Tie them, they are capable of coming untied, then surprise! Mine was done 30 years ago and they did it by about a 1 1/2 inch cut at the belly button. I felt a little uncomfortable, but that was all. I would think it is even easier on the patient now. If you had hernia surgery, this this should not even compare to that. I had my gall bladder taken out and I had one cut that was small and was up walking when I woke up. That was in 1997. I would think the new techniques they have is even more advanced from then.
Talk to your dr and how he plans to do the surgery. I was aways steered away from going through the bottom for female work as it can cause other problems.

[wj74]

Oh, it is definitely MY decision,. He doesn't want any more either, but I am scared to death that I will get pregnant and have to go off meds. I do believe that the IUD had something to do with it though... it releases hormones into your system slowly. And I never felt right after it was put in. I have a long track record with not doing well with hormones...even just progesterone. But I think it's the mix of the hormones and the bipolar. A long time ago I was put on progesterone while taking Zoloft and I had violent compulsions to slit my wrists. That was scary. I didn't know I had BP at the time.

Anyway... I do want it done. My youngest is 8 and I am really enjoying no potty training and diapers, temper tantrums, and all that fun stuff babies and toddlers bring. It's my sister's turn. :p

[kathy434]

The bottom line to ask yourself is are you totally sure you don't want to have anymore children?  If you are not sure yet, then choose a different birth control.  But if you know you are done with babies and ready to move on in your life, then it will be a slam dunk decision.
I would add, however, that your moods are not the result of wearing an IUD.  Your moods are more biological than that.  Upset hormones, yes.  Menses, yes.  Bipolar, yes.  Depressive illness, yes.  Getting your tubes tied is not going to directly put you into a mental tailspin.  Your attitude and thoughts about this procedure and the fact that you won't be fertile then is what can bring on a tailspin.  If you are really done with having more kids, then think ahead about sex without the fear of pregnancy.  It can make sex even better.  You and your husband can enjoy life in  more expansive ways.  While this procedure can make you infertile, being done right can also leave open the option of reversal, if you should ever choose.
I always wonder why men are such babies about taking responsibility for birth control.  Vasectomies are a lot simpler to perform on a man than tying tubes for a woman.  Less pain, less discomfort.  Gee whiz.  They rather a woman consume medication to her body to prevent conception, and they complain if they have to wear a condom.  That in itself is non-invasive or changing any physical hormones in themselves.  I just think some men are such babies.
After I made the decision I was happy with what I was blessed with and ready to give up diapers, cribs, tons of toys, elementary school, braces on teeth, bottles and nursing; wow, what an easy decision it was for me.  I didn't need to mess with my hormones and natural cycles anymore.  Pregnancy was no longer a worry.  I had a new view on my life to devote my time with my children, husband, and own pursuits.  I don't regret anything at all.  But the choice must be yours alone.  If it is your husband who doesn't want more kids, then let HIM get a vascetomy.  If it is your decision, then you do it.

[HVAC]

Had my tubes tied 13 years ago no big deal. Easy recovery. Sex is better with my husband because I do not worry about getting pregnant.

[wj74]

Ramble all you want, it makes me feel better. :)

[psyvamp]

Hi... I understand your dilemma... I went thru a very similar issue... I chose to have my tubes tied after 3 children and 2 miscarriages, 1 in late-pregnancy ....  I had a great ob-gyn, and she was very understanding and supportive. I went in as an outpatient, had the procedure and went home the same day... I had almost no pain and no scars whatsoever!!! (she did a small incision inside my belly button) and the procedure was done laparoscopically. I did however, have a bad bout of regret -- or depression for awhile after-- even though I knew i did NOT want another pregnancy, I think I still kinda 'mourned" the loss of my ability to-- almost as if it affected my womanhood... But that was short lived-- and it's been 11 years now!!!  I am VERY happy that I had it done!!!  Cuts down on alot of stress about worrying about a possible pregnancy......... My husband and I are now looking forward to some quality time as adults!!! with out the worries and hassles of small children, contraceptives and all the lovely things that go along with ... My kids are 20, 16v and 11, now.... getting more mature and I am happy... (Sorry if I rambled on too much--- i seem to be doing alot of that lately)

[hell1971]

my husband wouldnt do it either so it was left up to me, he was also too scared even though we agreed he would have it done because I had to give birth 4 times lol.

[wj74]

My husband is afraid to have it done. He's just not doing it. lol

I hope it doesn't trigger anything. I'm sure I will love not worrying about it, but I can kinda see being sad about it too. But the truth is, I have 3, we're not rich and I don't need a pregnancy.

[hell1971]

I had my tubes tied plus an ablation it was all keyhole and it was fine, the only thing I had was rare, I had a bowel problem straight after but this doesnt normally happen, I was not on BP meds then and I found it triggered a depressive episode, even though I didnt want anymore children I have 4 lol, I sort of mourned the fact I couldnt have any it was weird so just bare this in mind so you are not shocked afterwards, be prepared for it.

[Xila31]

I would say if you and your husband are done with kids, there is nothing wrong with wanting to tie the tubes. But if you are scared there is another option. Have you suggested he get a vasectamy? Or is he totally against it? They say that those are more easily reversable if you change your mind in the future. And if not it is a less invasive surgery to clip a man than a woman.

I've had a c-section and it is painful to recover from down there, but after a couple weeks I was back to normal. It was very scary for me at that time because I am also scared of surgery and I was scared for my baby. But, it all worked out and went well.

[JennyDots]

I've had a couple of surgeries, and though I was really scared beforehand, each time it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Hopefully you have a doctor you like, and you can trust him or her to take care of you and make sure you have a good surgeon. You'll probably find some really caring people who will reassure you any time you need to talk - most nurses are really kind people, and so are the techs who come through to give you tests. Remember that for any surgery, even day surgery, you need some time to recover and rest and let yourself heal, so don't plan anything major for a few days, and just take really good care of yourself. And let yourself be taken care of, too - if you have friends or family members who can come visit and pamper you, take them up on it! And keep thinking how great it will be to finally be FREE of worrying about birth control!