My manic state is slightly aggressive behavior. I say slightly because in the years before I was actually diagnosed I forced myself to keep the urges to hurt people and things hidden. I let that urge out once and had to physically stop myself from bashing my sister's head into the granite counter top! I never wanted to see anyone look at me with the absolute fear she had in her eyes ever again. So I suppressed it. When I couldn't do that, I apologized to people in advance and told them that my bad mood had nothing to do with them, I just wasn't well right then.
Get him some therapy. It has made a world of difference for me. Also, it's possible that his medication isn't right. I was lucky and found the right one on the first try, though I ended up having to up the dose after a while. I still go to therapy for what the medication can't take care of, but my mood swings are actually manageable now.
There's also an app that I love called emoods. It helps track bipolar symptoms, sleep patterns, medications, and therapy. You can also make notes. Then you can print everything off in a pdf to show to your doctor. It helped me realize that my bipolar is under control and that therapy was definitely needed. That app pretty much changed my life.
Hope this helps!
I would recommend getting him into therapy or a support group. Being in a support group with other bipolars helps him to identify with the illness and to be reassured that he is not the only one in the world with it. Individual therapy will give him the chance to tell a therapist how he feels about having the illness and express feelings that he does not want to share with you, but feels comfortable sharing it with someone who is licensed to help him understand what he is going through. Coming to terms with being bipolar is not an easy thing. I was diagnosed a year ago this past January and I am a 33 year old degreed social worker. Talk about throwing me for a loop. I had been manic for two months at the time I went to see a psychiatrist to figure out what in the world was wrong with me. I did not understand mania, except the surface symptoms that we were taught in psychology. I had suffered depression for years, which is why I sought help with a psychiatrist. I was feeling depressed along with being manic. Hence my diagnoses... mixed state Bipolar I. I also rapid cycle due to the mixed state, which is where one experiences both mania and depression at the same time. It is not fun being bipolar, but I am finally getting it under control and finally on the right meds. It took me a long time to accept being bipolar, because it has changed my life so drastically and I wanted that old life back, where I was in control. Bipolar takes away self control and it is a very frustrating illness to deal with. This next year is going to the rough for you and your son. It will take trial and error to find the right medicine combo for his biochemistry. You could be lucky, both Lithium and Abilify are excellent medicatons. I hope he is on the right meds from day one, it will make your battle much easier. I hope sharing a bit about the illness and my story will give you hope with your son. Good luck to the both of you!