help for a newbie

[Punky4life]

I am a 26 year old female and with in the past two weeks have been diagnosed with bipolar I disorder and was in the middle of a severe episode, because I am poor with no insurance I will either have to wait 3-5 months to get any medication or go to a calming center for up to 3 days which is what my therapist has recommended. I don't really have a question here but I guess it is. has anybody been voluntarily put in a 72 hour hold and what were your experiences? or any other advice anyone feels important..... I am really scared and don't have a real support system so I thought this would help.

[persephonedemeter]

I went on an Involuntary 72 hr hold, first time I was hospitalized, and it was the best thing that happened to me. I was having a bad reaction to my first psych med and my psychiatrist just kept increasing the dose over the phone. When I was brought into the er for psychosis and extreme agitation, they figured out it was the medication and decided to admit me while they weaned it off.  Only a week ago, I was depressed, but still able to work. It was an antidepressant,  and he was treating me for clinical depression. I wasn't diagnosed bipolar until about 3 psychiatrists later.

Obviously, since it was involuntary, I didn't want to go into a hospital. It was a lock up unit, and I ended up staying in there for about 3 weeks and then moved on to a partial program. i was agitated, but I was also really scared and very paranoid. I remember when I got admitted and shown my bed and sat down on it, I remember thinking that it was nice to be watched very closely, and I could probably lie down and be able to close my eyes. Before I was admitted, I wasn't sleeping for days before I was admitted to watch out for people out to get me.

I got really good care, and even though I was unable to sleep for a couple of nights after I got there, still convinced that the people who were out to get me would manage to get into a lock up unit, and I spent a lot of time pacing the hallways, I was treated very nicely and with better understanding than I got outside the hospital. Phone calls made me more agitated, so they told my friends and family to wait until I told them to call me. I also didn't have visitors for awhile. They did tell me right from the ER that they thought it was the med that was really setting me off. As I was being weaned off of it, they put me on temporary antipsychotics and sleep medication. Even when I was psychotic, they asked me for consent to give me the meds. I saw a psychiatrist or 2 every day. My therapist came when I was better for an inpatient session, by her own decision and with my permission . It was my first psychotic break.

Like thatquietgirl said. It was really nice not to get a lot of outside input and noise. The highlight of the days were mealtimes and visiting hours. I liked art therapy. I'm in San Francisco. We made tied dyed handerchiefs and scarves. That was years ago, but I still have my purple green and orange scarf. I don't wear it, but I take it out and think about it and thing about the nurses, psych techs, nurses aides, and the people who were patients like me very fondly. I was a real mess back then.  I went to all the therapy groups, and found it to be very helpful for the most part. I was a newbie too. The other patients help me feel more easy and less alone with what was going on in my head. Most of them were diagnosed for a long time with major depression, bipolar, and schizophrenia. It was a complete lock down unit with absolutely no privileges, so for 3 weeks I got to know almost  everyone pretty well. The weekends were pretty dull, and by the last few days, I really wanted to get out, but the medical team said I should be slowly introduced back to the outside world. I was admitted directly into a day hospital program for 2 or 3 months, slowly decreasing my hospital time and increasing my home and work time. When I had a setback, they put up my partial hospital time. They were worried about relapse. They also connected me with a psychiatrist immediately.

I wouldn't have anything to do with the psychiatrist I had before, and had dropped him when I was in the hospital. I was amicable about it, but I did give him a piece of my mind and told him how he could have handled it better. He didn't say he was sorry, but he did wish me good luck.    

[Bubulous]

I have a sanctuary as well..... at least for now.  When I move to Pennsylvania I will have to find a new one but it will be difficult because I am moving into a one bedroom apt up there with a friend but I will figure it out.

[weaver71]

I wanted to go to the hospital, but there are no facilities within a few hours drive and the ones further than that have a long waiting list. I decided to convert an old shed in my yard into a retreat space. It is a place I can go and tell everyone to leave me alone awhile, if they haven't figured it out by the time I go in there. The sanctuary has become my writing studio, meditation zone, and generally a place that feels safe and like I don't have to do anything in particular. My fear of psychotic mania has been reduced by this. Taking away the pressure and random advice of people on a regular basis seems to be reducing my fear, in turn, reducing my episode severity. If I could have gone, many times I would have. Even working on my retreat space was helpful, I still have some work to do on it, but feeling that I am making changes to improve things helps me maintain hope.

[Bubulous]

I have voluntarily been put on a 72 hour hold several times when my mania or depression has gotten out of hand.  Welcome to the forum by the way.  I find support here when  I can't find it anywhere else.  I have always had a good experience in the hospital.  Once you are admitted you can relax a little knowing that there are people around who monitor you and are equipped to deal with this type of situation.  As far as advice...  What are you having trouble with?   What is scaring you the most? (if you want to talk about it)

[thatquietgirl]

I went into a psych hospital before for a 72 hour hold voluntarily.  It was nice for me to get away from the stresses of home life and just focus on what I was dealing with without all the feedback family's apt to give.  It wasn't anything to write home about, but it was definitely beneficial.