i'm scared i'm losing it all

please someone must be able to help me, i'm forty years old female and a mother of five kids aged between 10 and 22. i love my partner and my kids dearly but why do i suddenly fly off the handle into a violent rage. i can almost feel it building and burning then bang! its there out in the open hurting everyone. one of the triggers is a woman who lives over the road and i can honestly say i have never felt rage like i feel toward her, i can't stand anyone who thinks she's 'normal' or 'ok' and i tell them in brutally honest tones if they mention her. it doesnt help that her 'partner' is a friend of my partners and they talk quite a bit which makes me angry as i often ask 'is she still there, the stupid c*w/b**ch etc' it also makes it worse as she is so damn ugly and has tourettes i'm not supposed to feel like this i know, i'm not normally this nasty, i can be, i've had a lot of upheaval in my life when i was younger. but this is differant, this is not normaland i don't want it to end in my partner leaving me

[Crystlas]

Are you displaying bipolar symptoms?  If you are just having anger issues then you probably need to see therapy and an anger management class in order to better understand why you are having anger problems.  I think there is a support board on here for anger so you can get additional insite.  

[DLA]

Think you should talk to your dr about checking your hormone levels asap.  40 with 5 kids, think perimenopause is a definite possibility.  Have your dr run a complete blood panel and your hormones to make sure it's not something going on internally setting off the moods.