so my rapist has been let off

got a call today from the police saying the let him off due to not enough evidence my mums made friends with him again sayin she wont let him in the house but i don't believe her i think she wil help him get me. ive been sittin by my room door with a knife all nite im scared to death i keep staring into space and crying i got brain dullness cnt think str8 cut myself again im drained i give up on life im tired dnt need anymore stress

[Xila31]

I think it was time you found yourself a new place to live. I would say go out into the town with whatever you can carry and look for anything like a local battered women's shelter. These shelters are set up so that men are not allowed to enter them or even know where they are. Most local churches would be able to help you find a shelter. Explain the situation and you can get help.

I'm serious that if you think you are in physical danger then you need to get away. Please take care and no cutting! Just remember that no matter what horrible situaton you are in, you do not deserve it. I'm sorry your mom seems to be sucked into this and right now you need to think of yourself first, if she is unwilling to cut this guy out of her life there isn't much you can do. I'm sorry about that.

[starbunny]

Xila is right. Although it is not easy a woman's shelter would be the best option, and if the thought of this seems unbearable remember it is only temporary, you won't be there forever they will help you find somewhere of your own where you can start a new 'safe' life with boundaries where you will be in control of who you allow into it.
When I went into a refuge I cried for about 2 days non stop it was so traumatic, so I know how hard this would be for you, but it opened the door for some support that I absolutely needed and I eventually came through as will happen to you if you chose to do so.
I wonder whether your mum really is friends with this guy or whether he has a controlling manipulative hold on her that based on fear that happens in some abusive situations. Whatever the reason, it is time to think of yourself now and despite him being let off you have done the right thing all the way and you can and will have the power to get through this :-D

[heyjude1]

Xila, how old are you?  Your age would determine the different ways to get help.

[heyjude1]

Xila31..sorry, I should have address to 25andhurt

[heyjude1]

If you are 25, you do have resources available.  I don't know where you live but in Texas you can dial 211 and get all the information available to you as a victim of a crime.  For sure you will be given contacts for womens shelters.  If you are low income and can not afford your own place, there are programs for assistance for housing, food stamps, medical and mental help.  If the 211 is not available in your area, google the department of human services and give them a call.  Also, I'm sure you could use some therapy or see a physcharist, the Federal government funds free mental health care or on a sliding scale based on your income...goggle MHMR and the link will take you to list of clincs in your area.  At the MHMR clinics there are social workers that can assist you in getting all the programs available to you.  I would get out of there asap and get in a women's shelter fo now if you don't have family or friends to stay with...If there is anything you have questions regarding programs, just send me a message and I will try to help you.  God bless you, Jude

[25andhurt]

im 26 hun ive tried womens shelters but they are all full my mums gone out in a car with him and im worried sick im not gna run anymore hun ive been in 4 or 5 in the past and been found i live in the uk hun.x

[heyjude1]

We are worried about your safety too!  Please get out if you begin to feel too threatened.  

[millysmadness]

my sweetheart get outta there! you do not need all this in your life,you need to be in a place where you can come to terms with this and find yourself again and have your life your mum should understand she needs to be there for you not him i really hope things get better for you,for reasons of my own i can see what you are going through but dont hurt yourself or worse you will come out of this and you will be much stronger take care xxxxx

[25andhurt]

hi i went to the docs 2day who are going to change my meds and change me from seing a counciler to a psych got home n my mum said she is letting the rapist in the house tomoro and that he went to the police yday to show msgs that i txt him bk saying that if he cums in the house ile stab him n they was going to remove me and section me but he backed out of that n told them not to cuz my mum would be stuck with my puppy. i dnt no what to do. im moving out on friday so that my mum can have her friend here i dnt no what to do

[heyjude1]

I am glad you are moving out, not for your Mom, but for you.  I hope getting away from that craziness will help you to devote your time and care to yourself.  I am also glad you are seeing a p-doc on a regular basis.  Stay in touch.

[Xila31]

Good, get away from him. I am so sorry that your mom has chosen him over you. That is terrible! Unfortunately it happens sometimes andI don't understand it. But, here is the deal now. You get out and start a new life! Do you hear? Sometimes the best thing you can do is say goodbye to people even if they are your family. And I know that is hard to do, especially since it is your mom, but this world isn't always easy or fair.

Just know that there are people in the world that do care. Find a safe place for yourself, take care of yourself, and take time to heal. I know it is hard, but we're all hoping that you are safe and alive.