thinking of stepping down my meds, feeling over-medicated

[psyvamp71]

I am Bipolar II, diagnosed and medicated since 2008--- I have been feeling over-medicated for some time now. I feel almost apathetic, with very little feelings at all. My response to everything is : "whatever", it doesn't matter" or "I don't care"--and that's how I really feel. I have no reactionary feelings. I'm flatlined out. My creativity is gone. I used to make lots of jewelry and other crafts and write poetry--- nah-uh, gone, nuthin'. My sex drive is in the hole too-- I still will have sex with my husband whenever he wants, but my desire for it is lost and my ability to be satisfied (orgasm) is gone.

I'm taking 2 mg Risprdal, 300 mg Wellbutrin, 10 mg Elavil ( amitriptyline) plus my valium as needed ( which I WON'T give up) it's a life saver for my anxiety when it hits, and Topamax 100mgs a day for Migraine prevention..... I WANT to drop the Elavil all together, reduce the Risperdal at least to 1 mg/day and reduce the Wellbutrin to 150 mg/day for a few monthes to see if that lightens things up a bit.... Sad part is I am most stable I have ever been on these drugs/dosages-- BUT  I am also the FLATEST and least ALIVE.

I want to FEEL again, live again, create again.... I feel so locked down by my meds I'm going crazy. Anyone else ever have this issue? how did you resolve it? how are you now? Is there hope for me on lower dosages of medication???? I need some help, any sound backs would be great, I feel so alone in this- I don't know for sure what my next step should be-- other than to make a doctor's appointment- then how do I convince him that this is what I NEED ? HELP !

[psyvamp71]

Yesterday i had a really good day, I mean really good, I felt good, I got things done, I talked with a friend for a couple of hours- made dinner, had a nice long conversation with my hubby after dinner, read for awhile, enjoyed my shower.... Just an all around good day-- I even got outside for a bit in the sunshine. Much better than the day of my last post-- I was pretty depressed that day! :(

Today isn't quite as productive as yesterday- but I still feel pretty good.
I did go ahead and stop the one pill-- the Elavil, the lowest dose antidepressant that I was taking- its been just over a week now.
Doc supports me getting off SOME of my meds.

Hoping for a good tomorrow, too. ----Psyvamp

[skibunny24]

I say hang in there. I'm coming off of mine too, as I can't find a new pdoc after mine dumped me 2 weeks ago. My withdrawals seem to last a few days. I wait until I feel in control for a few days before I decrease again. This is the piece she was missing--I want to give mu body adequet time to adjust between changes. Sounds likenyours will understand that! You can do this!

[psyvamp71]

Been thinking alot about this.... What IF -- it's the other way around? what if I am really in need of  higher doses of medication instead of lower ones? Yesterday was a bad day, sad, hopeless, crying.... just rotten. Maybe I'm lookin at the backside of things. I dunno. Maybe I'll just stay where I'm at for now and try to manage my feelings a little more, talk to someone a little more- do something. Just feel lost. Dang this freaking Bipolar/depression BS anyway...

[bubbls1031]

Hi.  I totally understand what you're going through, as I was there last year at this time.  As far as med changes go, though, you definitely want to do it with your doctor and also, make sure you are coming off/lowering meds slowly enough.  Unless there is some horrible reaction to a drug, it is best to do it very slowly.  Psych meds, etc. can cause WITHDRAWAL.  I tell you this because not only can it mess with your head and give physical symptoms as well, but you may end up having to go back up a bit on dosage because of it.  Also things like coma can occur too.  You aren't on anywhere near high enough of a dosage to have the coma thing happen I don't think, nor the withdrawal, but it is something to keep in mind both for now and the future.  Also I figure someone else might read this down the road and be on higher dosages too so...  Anyway, good luck with your med shift, I hope this helped some?

[psyvamp71]

I am going to talk to my Doctor BEFORE I start decreasing my meds- he has to write the new scripts for the lower doses. and he has to agree with what I have outlined. I have a good rapport with my doc, so we can usually discuss what I feel like I need and he will give me his thoughts on it-- sometimes we try it-- sometimes we do it his way. He says I am a "mature bipolar" that I am accepting that I need medication/intervention medically but also that I am my own best advocate in knowing my own body and psyche better than anyone else does. So he is willing to work WITH me on things. Thank heavens.

and to Weaver71- I am taking a whole host of supplements and working really hard on a nutritional level as well as exercise for my limited abilities-- I also have fibromyalgia and arthritis and asthma really bad, so in some things I am limited. But I am trying , and making some progress. Thank you. I agree- health really is a wholistic thing, and I use alot of natural/herbal/homeopathic supplements/remedies, etc. The idea is to treat the whole body not just one aspect of it. That we do agree upon. Thanks.

[weaver71]

By the way, I was not assuming you haven't already gotten your health in top condition. I simply see it in bipolar, addiction, PTSD, etc...the focus often is on the pills. We have to first get to our default health, to really know what the real issues are. Changing or taking pills alone is never the suction for true bipolar or addiction, focusing on the drugs as a sole solution is addict thinking. Drugs are a last resort, yet many forget that. That thinking is like giving an infant formula, a kid vitamins, and just drinking Ensure as an elder. Nothing wrong with supplements, but our body and minds need so much more to be healthy.

[weaver71]

My approach, get enough amino acids, omega acids, electrolytes, and solid nutrition in general. Get a cardio program going regularly and try to be in the top physical and nutritional health possible. Then I'd reduce the Meds slowly, probably slower than you outlined above. My doc told me I was a Med lifer with bipolar 1 and addiction, but I have been more stable the last 8 months than I ever have. I don't suggest anyone stop meds or even try to reduce them, but if they don't work, like they haven't for me, then I suggest getting on a bipolar supportive diet, exercise, and meditation before even considering a reduction. Sometimes the improved health is enough, people realize it wasn't the meds, but lack of nutrition, exercise and meditation. Many non-bipolar have bipolar symptoms from various health issues, so it seems to reason that missing nutrition and exercise would exacerbate these symptoms in a bipolar as well. Maybe visit a naturopath to get specific nutrient advice, for your specific body. Good luck.

[PaterEphrem]

Please re-consider your urgency to drop your medications without the consent of your physician (preferably psychiatrist). The harm done by a sudden discontinuation of a medication can cause significant setbacks. Many of us fall into the trap of convincing ourselves that a medication is doing very little or nothing for us, and so we decide to self-medicate and follow our very ill-informed feelings until we fall flat on our face and regret ever having tinkered with the medication.

The above relates to my personal experience. A slight drop in dosage of one of my principal medications was enough to cause a destabilisation that lasted 2 months, and was it rough.

The solution is to talk to your doctor.

[psyvamp71]

I've talked it over with my Husband-- he is supportive of me doing just what I described 100%- But he did warn me to go down on them 1 at a time instaead of all 3 at once. Good point I think. So tonight I STOP the Elavil completely. in 2 weeks I drop from 300 to 150 of the Wellbutrin, then in 30 days I drop from 2 to 1 mg of the Risperdal. Will I get totally off them all ??? I don't know. But I have to at least get down onto LOWER doses of to see if that helps at all.

I will be bringing my MD in on this- He'll have to write me new prescriptions. and its NOT that the drugs aren't working-- they are--just too well for my liking.

[skibunny24]

Oh man this rings true for me. My pdoc just fired me. I was leaning towards at least reducing them, maybe try ECT supplemented with lithium or something but she was so pissed that I wouldn't do what she wanted that she kicked me out with a 30 day supply of what I've got.
Different situation, but if what you are using isn't working, then I would have your pdoc slowly taper you off of one to see if that one is the culprit, and try different combos. I've been on that train for 15ish years and now I'm at my last resort, and glad that I know that the drugs dont work for me. Certainly talk to your doctor and be firm with what you want!