why don't docs listen?

I have spent the last thirty years (since i was fifteen) battling with depression and dysphoric mania, misdiagnosed with depression and treated with antidepressants that i kept going off because of weight gain. The most recent treatment with effexor xl was causing weight gain so i went to less than 1000 calories/day (was anorexic about ten/twelve years ago) as i did not want to gain weight. Now my cholesterol levels are 8+, i exercise up to 1 hour every day and eat only fruit, grains and meats with a little pasta or potato twice/day. I am tired of the medical profession telling me i need to watch my diet and cut out sweet things (lol) etc.. and refusing to see that it is the drugs effexor, xanax and priadel that are causing weight gain. fed up with taking drugs that still leave me feeling suicidal and agitated and am tempted to just stop taking them all and be able to read again at least. I also have gall bladder disease (hereditary, managed to avoid for the last twenty years because of good diet!!) and will be having surgery in two weeks. they refuse to listen to how terrified i am of this surgery. Have c section scar i haven't touched in twenty one years. how do i get my concerns across?

[RJ233]

Refuse to have the surgery until you get the results you want from the surgeon, or the help you need from the psychaitrist. As long as you are not having gall bladder attacks or it is life threatening right now, it gives you some time. Make an appointment, go to the surgeon, tell him exactly what is bothering you. If he can't understand, then get one that does.
If you have expressed all the mental issues you are having to your psychaitrist and he has done nothing, find another one, ASAP. We have a Physician Referral in the phone book here. They can help you find a doctor. They can tell you how long they have been in practice, their credentials and everything. Hopefully you will have one where you are.   If he is in a broken down place in a run down section of town, forget it. If he is a good doctor, he wouldn't be there. You can go on the web and find information on drs. Go through the phone book for names and pull up the info that you get. You may be able to find info on the State Medical Board site. If you know a nurse, check with her or him.

If you have not told your psychaitrist all of the mental issues you are having, then make an emergency appt. and go tell him.

There is no reason for you to go through so much agoney when there are plenty of different medications that can help you feel better. You reconize your status and that is a good step. Just deliver the message to the dr who is treating you or the new one that will.

What ever you do, DO NOT STOP YOUR MEDS. You can have some very bad reactions mentally from that. I know, I have been there and it is very, very bad.
I know the weight gain is bothering you. Keep in mind that you are doing all the right things. Tell your dr. about how you are holding on to weight though you eat healthy, non fat, non sweet foods and exercise daily, and you want to try medications that won't put on unwanted pounds. Would he please work with you on that?

Remember, you are the one hiring, not the other way around. You and your insurance pay for the services you receive. You can always hire someone else.

I have had my gall bladder removed. I have also had a c-section, historectomy and others. The gall bladder was not painful at all. I had a little discomfort and a tiny scar in my navel. When I woke up from the surgery, I got right out of bed, no problem. It is minor surgery now. They have greatly improved how they can do certain surgerys, causing less pain and small scaring.

I wish you the best on getting the results you deserve. Don't let anyone bully you. You are not alone going through this. All of us have had some of the same problems and you will find support here. Please keep in touch so we know how you are progressing.

[Venora Moonwind]

Alot of doctors dont listen  .They are human and they just happened to have gone to school longer and in a specialized field.
RJ is giving good advice here.WE have to be our advocates for our health. I now take everything I want to discuss with my docs on paper and it gets their attentin. I used to have issues and then when they asked me I would tell them everything is ok. I thinks its called the "white coat syndrome" Like when our blood pressure rises at the docs but it is normal any other time.
It is our health and we have to do what ever we need to do to get the best care possible.
Keep in touch.
Love Venora

[irishwriter]

Thank you both very much. Am in a really bad place at the moment and really do need to resist just throwing the meds out. had a very civilised discussion with my doc re: nexium v metacyl with me telling him i had nausea but never heart burn because i never eat anything that would aggravate the gall bladder but was still nauseous on nexium and had read its not a good drug so i stopped it and switched to metacyl. he kept arguing that i could not have had nausea while on nexium!! in end i asked 'bottom line which is safest' and he muttered 'metacyl'. that was the first time i ever stood up to him! my pdoc is generally excellent but is on hols at the moment. he has been fantastic about calling me two or three times a day but on the days he doesn't i feel abandoned! venora, my mind usually goes blank when i'm at the doc cos he's so supercilious so maybe i should write stuff down. there are no other docs in my area so have no choice about him. i have scars on my arms from him taking blood and scratching me with needle each time! had to have a tooth out last friday from clenching jaw on effexor and they don't believe it is a side effect even though it is written on the info sheet! my pdoc is not impressed that i started reducing the effexor myself and went off lexapro. went down by 75g from 300 and my jaw is not clenching as much. I increased the lithium last night and feel a bit better today! All the doc would tell me was the the blood was at a therapeutic level which he told me before that last increase! to feel a bit better is worth it though as i am fed up of taking drugs that just make me sick. i have no family here and nobody to bounce things off so am very grateful for your support. my daughter is fifteen and too young to hear this ****! am trying to tell myself that gall bladder surgery will make me feel better as am sick all the time with it. spoke to pdoc just now and he takes my fear seriously and we have decided that next week he'll speak with surgeon and we'll come up with a plan. thanks for that rj. surgery is set for 16th sept.

[RJ233]

I am so glad you are getting things straight for your surgery, so that you will not be in fear. You should feel better afterwards. Mine hurt rather than me getting sick on the stomach. Of course, I have a stomach made of steel. My brother on the other hand got really sick with his and then got it taken out. My sister had hers out when they were doing other surgery and saw the stones on the xray, so she never was sick or hurt.

Maybe this dr will get himself in gear. If the info sheet lists a side effect and you have it off any meds he gives you, take the paper from the drugstore with you and show it to him. Take a highlighter to it so he can't miss it. Is he going to argue with the maker of the med? Make that list and when you look at him forget the white jacket, he doesn't know everything, or he wouldn't be making the errors he does.

Be careful about changing your meds around. Talk to that dr.and make him realize what is happening and ask him to adjust them or change them to fix whatever problem you are having. They do end up changing and adding and subtracting actually through out your treatment. You change, the affects of the meds change and then sometimes you need a temporary add on to get you through situations in your life. You are doing the right thing by taking your meds. You want to get better, not worse.

Get some rest and relax things are going to work out just fine. We are here and we understand exactly what you are talking about. We are just a click away.

[irishwriter]

hi rj,

went away for a few days because with three friends deaths and ill health i hadn't been away since may. ended up really sick and going to doc at 6am on thurs where he told me i had irritable bowel syndrome! back home sat and back to doc sun with gall bladder pain and nausea! need full body transplant! went to doc today to have blood work and decided to treat him like a normal person and talked away, (think he thought i was insane!). asked him twice about actual blood/lithium levels and he finally told me and i found that i was in fact at the lower therapeutic levels of normal with plenty of room for increase so i wont give up on it yet. at the moment it is torture because i get an hour here and there when i fell good and then the switch goes off again and it's worse when it comes back. was very bad last night but lots of support on 'daily strength' network online. it is so good to finally not feel alone. i really appreciate your support. pdoc is to call surgeon today so hopefully he'll have a plan for me later.

[shortcircuited]

Almost every woman I know has had her gallbladder removed.  Is this what you will have?  There are laser procedures that may not even leave much of a scar.  Have you discussed this with your surgeon?  I think you will do fine with the surgery.

If you do have your gall bladder removed, do you know if you will have to make any dietary adjustments?  Maybe this will help with your weight issues.  (Maybe a silver lining, just an optimistic thought.)

Keep on the psychiatrist to get those meds adjusted to get rid of those symptoms/side effects.  There are too many drug options out there for you to have to put up with the misery without trying something else.

Don't give up.

[shortcircuited]

P.S.  Maybe the bowel thing will resolve as you get these other issues worked out.

[Venora Moonwind]

Just after I had my gall bladder surgery and I do menat right fter I came out of the anesthesia My darling hubby announced that I was on of the 4 F's .. Fat ,fat, female and forty. These are the prime canidates for  gall bladder disease,
As a long time IBS sufferer and then to have my gallbladder gone required that I did make some dietary changes. More fiber and calcium( have IBS with the big D as opposed to the big C) the calcium helps bind up the diareah.
  If you do have to have your gall bladder out jsut message me and I will go into more details of the surgery. Its not so bad as far as surgery goes. 4 tiny little scars ( they blend in nicely with the stretchmarks lol.) I got to home the next day. I was off for 2 weeks and I went back to work with doc note that said no housework till he said so. ( That really upset me. hehe)
I think he released me for normal work about 6 weeks after the surgery.

So you are in prayers that this gets resolved for you soon.
Vee

[irishwriter]

the gall bladder and ibs and bp are all hereditary! good thing was the dietician telling me i didn't have to change anything. the mere idea of eating anything fatty or oily would make me ill and always has! they reckon that's how i escaped it so far. most of my family had to have it removed in their twenties and my son had an attack at sixteen. took them weeks to diagnose him because he was so young. the fear i got too from my father!!! along with bp (yay) they tell me that both ibs and gb were triggered by all the stress and over work in early summer after all the funerals and my trying to be everything for everyone except myself. am very low at the moment but pdoc thinks gb is affecting mood too so hopefully removal will sort out a lot of things. dietician thinks i was not eating enough. I have tried to eat more regularly during the last few days and feel better physically but if i start to gain weight that adds to depression. was anorexic ten years ago and wearing age 10yrs tops and shorts and thinking i was huge!! while it's not as big an issue now it is still an issue. people here either tell you that 'you put on a bit of weight there' or 'you're gone awful thin and miserable' so i can't win!! thanks for all your help and advice. it is so good to have people who understand.