My 31 year old daughter who has been diagnosed as having BPD as well as BP2, was just left by her husband who has a host of psychiatric disorders himself. This is her 3rd marriage, some of which were at the same time (bigamy I guess) We have helped out financially, given advice til we're blue in the face," been there" for her many many times, which I am starting to think more of as bailing out than helping out. We are raising her 7 year old daughter. We tried to get her to wait to have children, but she didn't and then discovered she wasn't able to deal with the stress and restriction of a child., so what could we do but adopt her? I feel like she listens to our advice, then does the opposite, then waits for us to come to the rescue. I am having a hard time feeling any sympathy for her in this situation, especially since her wedding was just a year ago, and we strongly suggested she wait for marriage, hoping the relationship would peter out, but they both wanted a wedding where they could be stars for a day, and they got one.
Now she is moping around crying all the time, wanting to spend time with us, but very short tempered with the little one, borrowing money, etc. etc. and angry because we aren't feeling sad for her, and being "more supportive". I feel guilty, but I am beginning to feel very put upon. I know that suicide is common, and I am afraid that will be next. I don't know how to offer the most appropriate support. I'm afraid that by being not what she considers supportive, she will make a suicidal gesture or even a successful suicide, but I don't have a clue what to do. She has mental health care providers and takes meds, and now has klonopin for anxiety. I know she has started drinking agian, which isn't good with all the meds or her depressed mood, and I tell her that, but she says she is an adult or a similar remark. Can anyone help me? If anyone with BPD could give me insight I would appreciate it as well.
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