Is it just me?!!

I was diagnosed with bpd in my teens, but as the years went by I seemed to tuck it far into my recognition. I am now in my early 30s and in therapy I mentioned that I was looking for a group to start with, she recommended DBT. She said that it is primarily for people diagnosed with bpd, but she felt it would help me. That sparked something in my memory that I was already diagnosed with it, so I began doing a lot of research on this...Wow, I AM!!! For the past 15 years or so, I just thought I was miserable person. Now, it all makes sense. OK...so my question to all of you is...Now that I can admit that I am borderline, my husband uses it against me. If I approach him on something that bothers me, he will say its your borderline making you feel this way, etc... Maybe he is right on some things,but not everything!!! He has a passcode on his cell that I don't know and he won't tell me it. He says that it is his personal space and he doesn't feel I have the right any longer to look through his stuff ( I always had a snooping problem because I don't trust). So last night I stated that I feel very uneasy regarding that, he got furious and said and turned it back on me. What can I do about this? My borderline only seems to affect me and my husband, no one else sees it! They all feel he's the bad guy, he's controlling, jelous, mean at times, and he feels he's ALWAYS right! Help me in this!!!

[wandering_child]

I don't know how to help, but it's definitely not just you!!

I am a very recently diagnosed case of BDP (I'm 20 years old). But as soon as my boyfriend, who is generally a nice, friendly guy, found this out, he became SOOOO self-richeous all of a sudden. He said, "I told you so", as if we'd had some sort of secret bet over whether or not I'm insane, and he brings seemingly everlything I share as evidence for my "problem."

Now he's more than convinced that I've just been manipulating him this whole time because I need to feel loved by somebody, that I need somebody to "save me" and that I've been tricking him into loving me all along. He's also picked up the phrase "people like you..." for when he's trying to explain to me his expert reasons on why I am like I am.

I know I'm painting a very ugly picture of this guy. He's honestly wonderful, has a million friends, and saved my life. But I feel like this diagnosis was almost in a way worse than the issues I've always had with it because now he has an excuse as to why everything that goes wrong is all my fault. :/

[mg24]

I hear ya on all that! Within the next couple of weeks I will be starting dbt and I'm very hopeful about it. I finally feel theres a light at the end of the tunnel and I can begin getting in control of my emotions!

[wandering_child]

Good! I don't have any dbt set up for myself, but I'm researching it and trying to get some self-help books using those methods, so hopefully I'll be there soon. It's great to get to hear from somebody who understands, and good luck!!!

[mg24]

I agree, good luck to you too. Keep in touch.

[mg24]

Find your trigger. Why are u cutting? Who hurt u? Any crisis? Look at ur  world and ur emotions. I would cut when I was just so fusterated...at myself and my reaction/nonreaction to outside circumstances! Cutting I did in private. That was for me. Other self destructive behavior was attention seeking! I lived by negative attention is better than no attention at all. Drama was all I knew how to handle, when life was calm...I was panicked and still am sometimes! But I do try to recognize what and why im so self destructive. Easier said than done! It just ***** that someone could mold ur life so much! Its time we all take our control back! I wish you luck! P.s. Alcohol always seemed to make self mutilation easier, if true for you, please stay away from it.