I don't want to cut again. I cut myself earlier this evening on impulse with out thinking. I now feel really upset about it. Before I forget I would like to ask if there are any creams that can help scars less visible? Also, I am a little concerned about the sanity of myself receiving a message from God telling me that I don't need to cut again - I am a Christian, however would anyone call this psychosis me getting messages from God. I'd love not to cut again even though I've been doing it for years.
I notice that I mainly cut when I am over caught up in an emotional state that I can not clarify or understand quite what I feel. I get so overcome and feel a need to disperse the negative energy and by cutting it takes away the complexity by bringing me back down to earth to what I know and understand. Don't know if this makes any sense!?! Anyway I just get a huge release. Cutting deletes emotion.
Some people might call receiving a message from God a psychosis, but even non-BPD individuals have spiritually intense moments in which they feel they have received personal messages from divine sources, so I wouldn't worry about it as long as the messages are positive, helpful, and constructive.
I feel the urge at times -- when I'm over-wrought with emotional pain (research shows that "bringing the pain to the surface" -- ie: physical pain and the endorphins the body releases as a result of physical pain is easier to cope with than intense emotional pain that you're not sure what to do with, how to get out of, or how to "deal with." Like you, I don't want to harm myself any more, so I look for healthier things to substitute to "distract me" because your divine message is right. . . you don't HAVE to any more. You can make different choices, and with practice, you'll substitute other coping strategies.
When I feel the urge, I get busy doing something non-harmful. Is it perfect? Nope. . . it's trial and error as I seek out more constructive ways to deal with intense emotional pain. Sometimes intense exercise releases endorphins to make me feel better. . . sometimes I can manage to sleep and when I wake up the urge has passed. Sometimes I force myself to run an errand and when I manage to get that accomplished the urge has passed.
Well said. I've never tried to explain it before. When I get overwelmed or angry I turn my emotional pain to physical. Might be breaking things I love or hurting myself or others. Its awful to admit to but I can not cope with my emotions. Cutting does delete emotions.
Try the butterfly project (look it up) or you can try using puffy paint on your arm. Strange but somewhat effective. c: Try not to cut again. I may be seventeen, but I've been though the cutting thing. And try DBT skills, like distraction. Simply distract yourself in a positive way. I hope I helped some.
Hi there. I'm sorry to hear you have been feeling bad enough to cut but I completely understand as I cut myself and Yes 'tigeress37' is so right, the scars by day are indeed not desirable. Id say MissHabersham's response is spot on in advice, especially in the diversion of throught and deeds immediatly defore you want to cut. As regards to your having messages from God, again Miss Habersham is right, a lot of folk get messages from the Lord, God or Jesus so this is not necessarily any kind of sinister phsycosis. I wish you well and hope you receive the help you are looking for from this very good site. Good Luck. X
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