Borderline Personality Disorder Community
what should i do?
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what should i do?

Just got on Depakote not to mention been staying at my moms house and me and my boyfriend haven't been getting a long very well, and I don't feel like I can reach out to any of my friends. I've been having a really really hard time. Just crying all the time, and getting feelings of just wanting to hit myself. I feel like I hate myself. I JUST NEED SOMEONE HERE FOR ME. I feel like I can barely walk around through out the day I feel like any minute I'm just going to pass out , fall over and die.  and sometimes I wish I would. People put so much extra stress on me, I just can't do it. I know I need serious help. I just don't want to suffer anymore. I've been dealing with these problems since I was a little girl. It gets better for a while then it gets worse it's never just one way no matter how hard I work at it.
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Having a team of therapist, psychiatrist/psychiatric nurse practitioner, and a general practitioner (who all communicate with each other) is a great thing. I really recommend it. Insurance is an issue sometimes, but if you 'shop' around a little you may be able to find some people that you don't mind spilling your guts to. But in the meantime, you need to know that you are not alone. You have managed this far, stick with it. One day it will be better, but you have to be proactive in your own treatment. Perhaps you can focus on things that you can do to lower your stress levels? It can be difficult to think of things that make you happy/reduce stress, so maybe keep a piece of paper or use your cell phone to keep track of ideas that may pop into your head. Things can't stay crappy forever. I wish you the best of luck.  
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THAT'S A REALLY GOOD IDEA RIGHT NOW I HAVE 2 PEOPLE INVOLVED BUT IT DOESNT HELP WHEN THERE NOT ON THE SAME PAGE. THANK YOU FOR SAYING I'M NOT A LONE HEARING THAT ALWAYS HELPS I ALWAYS NEED A REMINDER BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH I HEAR IT , I ALWAYS START TO FEEL LIKE " NO ONE FEELS LIKE YOU DO, YOUR CRAZY AND STUPID" THANK YOU FOR THAT. I WILL MAYBE LOOK ONLINE AND FIND SOMETHINGS THAT WILL LOWER STRESS LEVELS MAYBE EATING BETTER OR SOMETHING? THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING <3 XOXO
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Avatar_m_tn
Dont give up sweetheart. Are you getting any help at all? This book has started really helping me: Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook

It's less than $20. Even less on Amazon. It is specifically for us, though it's starting to be used in other disorders as well. It's simple and really helpful. Doesn't solve all of my problems of course, but it gives me tools to use that can be very helpful. Talking on here is a good thing too, so keep us posted:)
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