Is it worth it?????

I am a two time breast cancer "survivor" I had lumpectomy/chemo/radiation starting in 7/02 then had a recurrence in 1/06 with bilateral mastectomy and implant reconstruction, oh yes and chemo once again. The following October the right implant had to be removed due to improper healing, the  skin, muscle and blood supply were compromised  from radiation. I am left with a crater and am considering a lat flap. I am an active athletic 50 year old and cannot imagine using the prosthesis for the rest of my days. If anyone has had the lat flap procedure done can you share with me if you are happy with the results, and was it worth it to go through this major surgery?  Fortunatly my husband and girls are supportive either way and actually feel I should not go through with it but will support me either way. I go from wanting it done to not to HELL NO I will not have that done to me. Is it "normal" to feel so anxious or is it a sign that I am just not ready? I realize this is so personal but I just wanted some feedback from those that have been through the procedure. Thanks for your input.  Michele

[Sheila62]

Oh Michele - my name should be signed to your post about debating having the lat flap surgery.  I had mastectomy for cancer Christmas week of '04, chemo and radiation in '05, prophylactic removal of other breast in '06, laparoscopic hysterectomy in '06 (because two of my sisters diagnosed with ovarian cancer).  So, I have lots of scars on my front area with no boobs to show for them all.  I am 45 years old and an avid tennis player both recreationally and competitive team play.  It (tennis) is about the only 'thing' I do for myself and would be devastated if another surgery derailed my game where it is now.  I breezed through the whole cancer and chemo/rads ordeal both physically and mentally - I was a role model for many, but I am scared to have this lat flap procedure done.  Some days I don't mind my prosthetics and other times I can't stand them because of certain clothing or just looking at those two scars across my chest.  I am reminded every day that I am a cancer survivor, but I guess if I had implants that would remind me too.  Then you have to have your implants replaced about 15 years after they are put in so that means I have to go in as a 60 year old for this and then again at 75!  I don't think so.  My PS says it is really about a year's worth of visits (if you go all the way and get the nipples, etc.)  I could go on and on....I have to have the lat flap on one side and then just a regular expander on the other, two automatic pain pumps and at least four drains.  PS says I would be wanting/needing to be on those pain pumps for 1-2 weeks post surgery and that I couldn't drive for that time since I would be on narcotics!  When I had my first mastectomy I had to keep the two drains in for 3 weeks - it was so irritating.  My husband says "don't do this surgery for me" (which I wasn't anyway).  When PS told me that the expanders had to stay in for 4-6 months before permanent implants go in I was a little dumbfounded.  I had no idea.  I thought you just go in 3 or 4 times for pumping up and then you get to do the exchange right away. I cannot imagine going through this spring and early summer with those giant weird shaped shelf looking expanders in.  It really messes up my whole schedule with summer, vacations, restrictions, etc.  I know that in the long run I supposed it would be worth it to have actual boobs again, but I read too many stories of complications on these boards and that always puts the doubt back in my mind just when I am looking at my calendar to set the date for the surgery.  I have NO IDEA what to do even after a one hour meeting with my PS earlier this week.  If I am 50/50 then I will probably not do it.  I have actually chickened out once already and if I chicken out again that would make it twice.  Now if I was facing cancer again or another disease, I am 100% ready to do whatever it takes to rid myself of that.  I guess I am looking at having breasts again as an elective, you know.  It's not absolutely necessary for me to do this.  (I was an A cup before cancer, but now where a nice B prothesis!)  Maybe I'll go back to the store and try on some C's.  I am supposed to hear from my PS scheduler person to set up my date but I am sooooooooooooooooo leery right now.  Sorry this is so long......Sheila  write me back.

[lhughes]

Are you candidates for a tram flap???

I had one done this past summer and am very happy with the results.  I started in April and finished the final phase in September.

Whatever you decide, good luck to both of you.
Lisa

[shelley50]

I don't know if this will get to you, My PS gave me the name of a lady that had the lat flap done just a few days before Christmas 07. I talked to her last night, she was a tremendous help. She said it was not as big a deal as the surgeon said it would be. Once the drain came out she was "good to go". She actually went back to work after 2 weeks !!!!!!!! She was an amazing help and she even said she got back on the treadmill for exercise after just 2 weeks. Isn't that amazing ?????? After talking to her I think I am going to go ahead with this. She said she about went crazy with apprehension prior to the surgery and she wishes she would've not been so anxious. That she would do it again in a heartbeat. Also, she said she took NO pain med after her first three days, she didn't like the way it made her feel which I can totally relate. I have the leading PS reconstruction surgeon in Saint Louis, he does not use pain pumps which makes me think they might not be needed. Also, the expanders take about 2-3 months if you go every 2 weeks for a fill, other than the inconvenience it isn't so bad, at least you won't be doing it along with a chemo regimen. I have 2 websites to give you that she gave me but of course they are in an email, I will try to send them to you. I did have to laugh, we are soulmates, I cancelled my lat flap surgery that was scheduled for last July, I  cx 1.5 months out because I was not sleeping and so anxious. I just wasn't ready. Bless you, I wish I could get your email address but I don''t know how to do that.  Michele

[Sheila62]

Thanks for keeping up with this website.  I was anxious (there's that word again) to see if you had replied.  I have also realized that if I can go through the diagnosis, treatments, hair loss, surgeries, etc. that this should be nothing worse.  That is good you got to hear from the other lady who just had it done.  I think I was most apprehensive about the timing of the surgery and the expander months.  I think I am going to wait until the majority of summer vacation is over and have the procedure done right before school starts back.  Then it will be the Fall/Winter time frame for the months of expanders and new boobs would be "ready" to debut just in time for Spring and next Summer.  I have only looked at the photo album of before and afters and it was quite impressive.  I know that the 3-6 months will go by quickly and like I said I wish I would have done this several months ago as far as the timing of it all.  I will respond to the question about tram flap from the other poster - I do not have enough belly fat to do it.  I guess the PS always paints the worst case scenario about needing meds for 1-2 weeks so that you can't come back to them and complain about it.  I would hope that I could get off after a couple days also.  Don't like to use them if pain is tolerable.  My PS says my expanders would be 4-6 months, so there again maybe she is saying that on the side of caution - don't know.  Here is my email:   ***@****     I live in Florida and all my Dr's. are in the Jacksonville area.  Feel free to email me for sure.  THANKS:)

[Sheila62]

Hey Lisa.

Thanks, but I don't have enough 'fat' for the TRAM which was surprising to me!  I too have a Lauren, but she's 18.  Thanks for your good wishes.

Sheila62

[Sheila62]

Just realized that you can't give your email out, so I will try to send you it in code, here goes:

just put my initials which are:   sht
follow that with the @ sign
then finish up with:   comcast
then:   .net

Maybe that will work.

[shelley50]

Hi I tried the email address but it came back to me....***@****

[shelley50]

lalalalala sht lalalalal at lalalalala comcast. lalalalalalala net  is that correct?

[Sheila62]

Yes, that looks correct.

My initials are sht and then my provider is comcast and then .net
We may just have to do this on this board under chat or something.

[Sheila62]

Maybe I could try to send you an email from my end.

Sheila

[shelley50]

dalimamma lalala at lalalala charter lalalala .net   Lisa would love for you to call and talk  to her directly if that works for you.