My mom has metastatic breast cancer! What should i expect??

My mom got breast cancer in 2004. She had it removed and was ok for a few years. About 3 years ago it came back, but this time she has 2 tumors on one lung and 1 tumor on the other. She did her first round of chemotherapy and the treatment worked so well! It gave us all some hope. Unfortunately now it is starting to grow again. They did chemo a second time and there was no result, she has been on so many clinical trials. The doctor has told her that her blood came back with less cancer in it, which i thought was good. I didn't really understand what that meant though..... So she has been on some medication that they are trying to use to control the growth, and she has been on it for 3 months i believe. She was scheduled to go get a scan done again, and to see what the results say.
I am just terrified, i do not know what to do, or what to expect, or if what i am thinking is completely wrong information. Everything i have read about her cancer is bad, leaving me with no hope. They say it is unlikely for these women to live longer than 5 years. if that is true, then i only have 2 years left with her. Even her doctor tells her she is very healthy, she does well with treatments, and that she is strong. She also said if they didn't know her past history with breast cancer, than the tumors were so small they wouldn't have even thought anything about them.... so does that mean she will get very sick, very fast???
Is there anyway she can have surgery, or is there any place in other countries that have more options? I am just totally overwhelmed and confused.

[Cleveland Clinic]

Dear 83amd, The goal of treatment of metastatic breast cancer is to control the disease and symptoms of the disease for as long as possible.  Decisions about treatment are made based on many factors such as prior treatments and response to treatment, side effects of the treatments, the overall health of the patient, the risks and benefits of the treatment plan for the patient - always keeping in mind the goal of care.  Surgery is done as local treatment and can take care of one area at a time - in the setting of metastatic disease where cancer has spread to other areas, surgery risks often outweigh the benefit that might be obtained.  We can't predict with certainty how an individual will respond to treatment, or how long a person will live.  That your mother is in good health and strong (outside of the cancer) is a hopeful sign that she will do well with treatments, it doesn't mean she'll get sick very fast - however cancer can be unpredictable and unexpected things can happen.  
It would be helpful to you if you are able (and your mom agrees) to go with her when she sees the oncologist.  This way you can hear the explanation the oncologist gives about your mom's disease and treatment plan and ask some of your questions.  The oncologist can answer in context of your mother's situation.