End-Stage Liver Cancer

My father is 78.  He was diagnosed with prostate cancer 6 years ago and treated it with radiation.  The cancer reappeared a few years later as colon cancer and he had a section of his colon and his gall bladder removed.  About a year ago the cancer surfaced again, this time as liver cancer with spots detected in his stomach and lungs as well.  We have known for some time that the cancer is terminal.  My dad has been on chemo. until recently, in hopes of extending his life.

Last week he was feeling particularly weak and went to his doctor.  His doctor detected jaundice and further tests revealed that the cancer has progressed throughout his liver and lungs.  He has begun to retain water and is sleeping more.  I understand that these are symptoms of liver failure.  The doctors told us that there is nothing more they can do and estimate he has only a few weeks left.  They have stopped all medications (except for nausea, pain, and diarretic meds).

We took my father home and immediately setup hospice care for him.  I'm trying to learn what we can expect over the next few weeks so that I can help my family prepare for it and make my father as comfortable as possible for as long as we're blessed to have him.  Can anyone help guide me on what we can expect to happen as this progresses?  I've read about the possibility of the loss of cognitive function, random hand movement, and even water seeping from body tissues.  But all that the doctors have told us is that my father will sleep more and more until he eventually falls asleep and never wakes up.  While that's a comforting thought, I suspect the reality is somewhat different (I lost someone to luekemia and lymphoma, and know what that's like).  Any help or pointers to websites would be appreciated.

Thank you.

[Crits]

My father has liver cancer too and although he is not quite at your father's stage yet, rest assured your Dad should go peacefully and with relatively no pain.  The doctors are right.  I know of 2 people whose parents each died the same way. It is quite accurate about the poor appetite and sleeping more.  He will be just tired all the time and won't want to get out of bed.  Once he hits that point, making him comfortable in his surroundings and with people he loves will probably make him feel safe and ready.  That's the best gift that you can give.
If you find a website that describes this end stage, let me know too.  

[Chrissy1635]

My dad took 2 weeks to die he slept more and more but had periods where he was awake and very aware of his surrounding we would talk to him and tell him how much we loved him. He was on a Morphine pump for pain and had regular visits from the hospice nurses at first when we got him home he was eating a little then stopped completely. We would wet the inside of his mouth with special sponges on a stick to moist his mouth as they get very dry sometimes he would suck on this. We also put salve on his lips to keep them most. he always felt warm to the touch but in his last few hours we noticed that his arms and body were cold when we touch him. Spent as much time with your daD TELL HIM ALL YOU WANT TO TELL HIM BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE.

[LLWB]

I lost my husband a year ago July 29, to lung, brain, spine, bone, and finally liver cancer. He went very quickly 12 weeks from diagnosis to death. The last few days he didn't eat, was incontinent, and the day before death he was hallucinating, and paranoid, either from the brain tumors or morphine. He finally fell into a coma around midnight, and died the next morning. His hands and feet were very cold to the touch at the end. I agree with above poster, tell him you love him, and just make him comfortable. Do not be afraid to medicate him as much as he needs to be comfortable. My husbands last few days appeared to be relativly comfortable, and not as painful as we had expected . I also cared for him at home with Hospice help, what a wonderful caring organization. Unfortunately his paranoia made him afraid of the visiting nurse, so we surrounded him with family members. My prayers are with you. If you are the one caring for him, remember to talk with him too, I was so busy doing the physical caring, that I didn't spend enough time just loving him. God Bless.

[kelly greece]

My dad -age 66- was diagnosed with secondary liver cancer last June. Since then he has received various drug combinations (chemotherapy) but unfortunatly he is getting worse by the day. Especially this last week he feels very weak and tired, he can hardly walk and all of a sudden I see the end comming fast. I am having great difficulty dealing with the whole situation and I have so many unanswered questions of what to expect. am hopping there will be the least possible pain and that I will be strong enough for my whole family and for him. I can only wish you to be strong and may god be with us all.

[noel1998]

thankyou to all with this liver cancer i can not take to much morr e of th e demands on the people they leave behind
i'am angry and left with a 9 year old son to llok after
all the best and pray's are all with you all

[The_Daughter]

My father was diagnosed with colorectal cancer last September 2007, underwent surgery to remove the 25 cm growth, and was found to have liver cancer as well.  Since my father also has endstage renal failure, chemotherapy would only have hastened his death.  Last week, the doctors did another CT scan and saw that the cancer had spread to his stomach and his lungs. (My father had recently begun complaining about stomach pain.)  My father is now on palliative care, with prescribed pain reliever patches.  He still is in some pain, but not as much as before.  He gets tired really easily.  We have him at home, and we have two private nurses to help us care for him.  Although it hurts so much to see my dear father in such pain, the only thing we can really do is keep him comfortable, minimize his pain, keep him feeling loved and worry-free.  We do not know how long he will last, although the doctors have told us to start getting ready for his demise.

[marl1964]

My mother in law has had cancer in her bladder 10 yrs ago. Last year had part of her stomach,bowel and gall bladder removed, so she has secondary liver cancer. She is so full of jaundice it scares me to look at her. They tried to put a stent in today but couldn't because if the tubes leading to bladder bag on her side ( forget what its called). The dr. told my hubby today he gives her 6 months. Next week they r going to try and insert a needle into the liver to remove some of the toxic buildup. They have also started her on a chemo pill. She is very tired, very very yellow almost orange and has lost alot of weight throught everything. I really don't give her 6 months to look at her maybe and maybe 6 weeks. I don't know what to expect, she is having no pain right now but is very very itchy from the Jaundice.

[tinytears]

my thoughts are with you.My sister commutes between America and Northern Ireland on a 6 week basis, as her husband works in america, on this visit to america she took ill, and was bleeding badly (down below) and went to the doctor who immediately sent her to the ER dept, she had lost 4 pints of blood, and had a blood transfusion, she continued to loose blood, and docs performed an emergency hysterectomy to save her life as they said she would bleed to death, They discovered she had cancer in her uterus, and several large tumors on her  liver, the largest being 12cm, they have given her no hope of surviving longer that 3-4 months.  My husband and I flew over from N Ireland to be with her the day after her surgery to take her back home. she is very tired and has no appetite, but we are not sure if this is the result of her hysterectomy recovery or if she is already showing signs  of the liver cancer accelerating.  She did not feel ill at all in fact was full of life, but  had breast cancer 8 years ago and had a double mastectomy and econstructive surgery.  This has come as a huge shock to all the family and to my sister and her husband, and we just don't know what to expect, she is a bright outgoing lady, and the thought of her being in any pain or losing her mind is tearing me apart.  What can I do for her she has not even cried and i can tell she is terrified about what lies ahead of her.

[pus]

My mum was Dx. in Jan 08" She started on chemo for secondary Liver Ca. The Drs. have told her there is nothing more they can do. The tumors have doubled sinse the last scan. Pallitive care are now involved, my mum lives with me and has done for the last 6 years, sinse dad died. Its so hard watching her, she sleeps all the time, she used to love her food but now has lost her appitite, she has said she just wants to die, I feel she has given up on life and wonders why god has done this to her. Its hard to know whether it is depression as well and do we start her on anti depressive medication.    

[SweetHaven3]

To anyone who is interested:
     I found this wonderful website that describes specifically what to expect with the end stages of liver cancer:
http://en.allexperts.com/q/Life-Support-Issues-2065/Dying-Liver-Cancer.htm
     My father is 83, and terminally ill with secondary liver cancer, metastasized from colon cancer.  He has begun to sleep more and more, taking a 2-3 hr. morning nap and 3-4 hrs. in the afternoon.  He has no pain, thus far, I believe because he is diabetic.  He has had two massive heart attacks and never felt anything.  Can we finally see a positive side to diabetes??  LOL
     Hospice is very helpful, I have worked with them with other family members.  Do not hesitate to use them, if available.  I am a newly graduated RN, but have seen enough to know that you should not hesitate to give pain medications to terminal cancer patients.... sometimes it is unbearable.  But Hospice can advise you of the proper use.  Often more meds are needed than for other patients, due to the intensity of pain.
     Dad has been "given" 2 months to live, but one never knows.  His attitude remains positive and he spends his days doing things he likes, as much as his energy allows.  We have a long road ahead of us.  I know it will only get worse, before he leaves us.

[DMR0828]

My dad was diagnosed on his b-day 2/14/08 and was told he had liver cancer and a nodule present in his chest. We have had a hard time dealing with this and since I am the oldest I have been left to make the harsh decisions. Since February we have been to many doctors and hospitals and he is currently in the hospital for the past week. We meet with teh social worker tomorrow as well as the doctors. I want to take him home but he lives alone and we all have work, etc. Whenever he realizes who I am he keeps telling me to take him home. I don't want to put him in a Nursing home or hospice because I think he will hate me forever. I look into his eyes and see he is so scared and doesnt understand why nobody can help him. I can't stop thinking of when he looks at me. He has been not with it all time. Sometimes he seems somewhat alert and knows everyones names and then other times he is in another world. The doctors keep telling me its the toxins but I can't understand why that can't make him better. I read all these postings and I can't believe so many people have similar stories. Why is everybody suffering? Why does it have to be this way?

[oniko215]

Hello Everyone. My english is not very good but I will try to explain my condition. My mother-in-law diagnosed with liver cancer this year and she took chemotheraphy 3 times. After the theraphy she was just fine doing everything also she had soo much energy. Suddenly she took some Hepatitis B pills and it just went wrong. She had a swellen abdomen and she's right now in the hospital. Doctor's told me that she has left only few weeks. It's soo difficult for me because somebody you cared a lot is dying just in front of your eyes. Sometimes she cries and telling me that I have to take care of her son in the future. It's very difficult for me and my family because we have a 3 years old twins. They will send us home after 2 days with hospice care. I will take care of her most of the time. Can anyone give me advice how I can make her happy? What can I do for her? How I can prepare my self for the end? I really want to be strong but I can't.
Thank you everyone and wish you guys happiness and health.

[Damari]

Hello all. My mom has liver cancer end stage. She had all the possible treatments. She was diagnosed 2 years ago.She is now in hospice.She went to Puerto Rico 2 weeks ago for 3 weeks and she was fine. I spoke to her everyday while she was there,and everytime I spoke to her she was like my old mom, like she was never sick. It was when she got back that she stated declining. She stopped eating and started sleeping more, and would only get out of bed to use the bathroom. Now that she is in hospice I have accepted that she doesn't have long to live. She needs my family there for love and support. The crazy thing is that once she got back from Puerto Rico,she requested to be admitted to the hospice. It was like she knew she was ready to go. As soon as she got back she told me that she wanted to go.My family is willing to make her as comfortable as possible. I will miss her.I miss her now.She is my best friend.Just wanted to share this with everyone. I LOVE YOU MAMI, I can't wait to see you smiling again, You are Forever in my heart, Damari Pizarro        

[Sandy1970]

My dad just past away this wednesday the 8th.He to was diagnosed with liver cancer about four years ago.They did something they called freezing it,which lasted until this past may then he underwent radiation,experimental drugs then lastly chemo.My dad who was a very hard worker, are family never went without .He never got to enjoy retirement. Who would do anything for anyone , lost his battle with cancer two days after his 64th bday.He to went fast.He was scared and that scared me Ive never heard my father talk that way.My dad went to hospice on friday went downhill very fast ,my dad was in and out of sleep alot maybe saying a few words here and there .Stopped eating and then just slept.Wednesday morning his breathing changed I cant describe it but you no thats it.My brother and sisters and mom where with him when he past.I was glad we were there for him when he past.Like he was always there for us when we needed him.He was a great man Daniel Hunter who will never be forgotten.Just remember at least they will finally be at peace and they will be always watching over us I have to believe that.Sandy G

[pat198]

I know how it feels to lose someone you love to cancer. My dad passed in 1993 with lung cancer. He was a hard working man a great husband to my mom and a great dad and papa. I miss him everyday. I am now watching my mother in law suffer with liver cancer. She started with breast cancer 3 years ago and it has spread from there. Her husband made a very hard decision on the 31st of Oct. He declined anymore treatments for her. And we put her on hospice. If anyone has the opportunity to use the hospice program, please do. It is wonderful. I see my mother in law suffer and it breaks my heart. It breaks my heart not only  for me, but for her husband of 46years, her son, her daughter and her grandchildren.She also sleeps more and they also think that it has spread to her brain.  So, please lets all just love each other while we still have the time left. Thanks for listening. My prayers are with all of you!!!

[LVngFriend]

Thank you for all of your posts.  I have a very dear friend who has been living with Liver Cancer for some years.  He is in the end stages now. I am the only person in his life that knows of his condition.  He has chosen not to tell any of his family members.  While I do not mind knowing & being a support for him, it is also hard - because he has created this "secret." Never a healthy thing to do.  He also only tells me bits and pieces of what is going on with him - I have to listen carefully & then do my research to understand what is really happening. From your posts, I realize he is closer to death than I previously thought. We talk a little bit about death, but not much - we just talk and are there for each other. The situation makes me so sad & I really wish I could do more.  I worry about his very last days . . .

[Maui0312]

My mother was diagnosed with colon cancer in 2001, and had a golf-ball sized tumor removed from her colon and the colon resectioned.  Then they found that it had metastasized to her liver, and she had 80% of her liver removed, as well as all her female organs.  Since then, she's had one 2-inch tumor in her liver that was cryogenically frozen out. Plus, she now has 3 small spots in her lungs and just recently they found a spot on her adrenal gland.  Now here's the question... she has been doing well in chemotherapy (in her 7th round now), and has only had one blood transfusion - which was about a month ago.  But lately, I see her going downhill - tired all the time, and not eating as much.  She's been losing about 3-4 pounds a month for a year now.  So what's next?  It sounds from all the posts that she might not have much longer to live.

[roziepozie]

hi,
my father in law has had hepatits c and cirrohsis of the liver for many years now.  Last week he was admitted to the hospital for jaundice. They now tell him he probably has liver cancer but cant do a biposy or fit him into an mri machine.  So they have him in the VA hospital and now say he has liver cancer most likely and there is nothing else they can do for him.  Can you give me any additional info on this? How long he may have left or if they should be trying to treat this jaundice? They also say all his levels from blood tests are off...just need some answers. thank you very much

[mercy3333]

My husband lost his best friend to liver failure.  A week before he died he was out playing golf all day with his son.
Then he started to sleep a lot, wander around the house, had jauntice.
About three days before his death he hit his wife, tried to shot the dog, and urinated in the livingroom.
This lasted about a day.
After that he went in a deep sleep and passed away.
The toxins were in his blood and affecting his brain - thus everything.  He did not have control.

Now I have a friend's friend that is dying of lung and liver cancer - two separate illnesses.  She thinks she wil get a transplant - but she is in her 60's and very frail now.  She sleeps most of the time, is on oxygen, and is in pain.
What one must do is to be strong, realistic, and merciful to all concerned.  Many times just being there is what is important.  You don't have to say anything.  Bring a meal, give a hug, hold a hand.  Be a steady comfort to those who are in a confusing and hurtful time of their lives.  Don't forget that the death of the loved one does not end it for those who nursed, loved, and miss the one who is dead.

You must look to God for all your needs.  He will stand by you.  Everyone goes through tragic events - it is the world we live in.  But those who believe will know peace and a life after this death that can not even be imagined.
This I know to be true.  Open a Bible for your comfort and read to the patient and to yourselves.

[DeeplySaddened]

Hi dads helper, I see this post was made back in 2007. I'm sorry for your loss and know that it had to be rough losing someone that you loved.

I found this site because my grandfather is 78 and also has Liver Cancer. He is dark yellow & his eyes are too, he sleeps all the time, his right hand looks like it has parkinsons disease (can't spell), and when he urinates, it looks like someone poured coke all in the toliet. I am 21 and this is the first real death I've ever had to deal with. I know that 78 is a very lucky age to live to because a lot of people only make it to their 60s. I was just writing too see if he is in the last stage of Cancer & what anyone did to deal with the pain. Thank You for reading this, my screen name is ***@**** if anyone wants to write me.
~Lacey

[DeeplySaddened]

I didn't know that my screen name wouldn't show up. It's crazydriver17 at aol

[namratasnv]

Hi,

My friends father has got this problem but only to primary stage.
Thanks God,doctors recognized it and start the treatment.
His health is ok but treatment is very costly.

Thanks.  

[sherryluttrell]

my husband is 46 and was recently diagnosed stage IV prostate cancer- and was given 6-18 months to live.
He is not a candidate for any surgical options, nor chemo. He was immediately put on hormone therapy, which the Dr. says will be effective for 9-12 months.........
I am not sure what life will look like in 12 months. Other than  preparing for the time he becomes hormone resistant and educating myself on the role nutrition plays, I am not getting much help from the medical community.
Any advice?
SNL

[squirell]

my beloved dad has just been told he has liver cancer  2 tumuors since then he has lost his spirirt  hypo confusion,  very aggresive (aggressive)  and all over the place my heart is breaking

[allmymarbles]

Depression without a cause is neurosis. Depression with a cause is normal. Have you tried giving her milk thistle? It is a liver cleanser. My sister took it after having part of liver removed because of secondary liver cancer. She refused chemotherapy and has been cancer free for over five years. It is worth trying and won't hurt.

[bazza2000]

My brother who is 59 years old has had bladder cancer for the past 10 years Drs were content wih removing them without any other treatment 4 months ago cancer had spread to his bowel and prostate so he had surgery and some chemo.Current scans show it has spred to his liver and has been given 6 months to live . He is going to have 2 lots of chemo over a 2 week period and if this has not helped he will have no more treatment.He looks well in himself but mentally he is have a hugh battle

[Rangegurl]

My dad was diagnosed with colon, liver and lung cancer six months ago after he had put himself on a diet, then lost his appetite completely. The "spots"on his liver are 5cm each and has two spots on his lungs (not sure how big) and the doc believe its primary origin is the colon. He also has it in his lymph nodes.  The cancer clinic said they couldnt see him until at least the end of January 2010 and i am thinking it will be too late by then!! He is starting to have difficulty breathing so has quit his daily workouts(he is 76) and has a loss of appetite again...No body will tell us what is happening or what to expect next or how long we have.....I fear we have only a few weeks...Is this right?  I just want some answers....I lost my mom 5 years ago to pancreatic cancer....we found out and 3 weeks later she was gone....somebody please help!!!!!!!

Rangegurl

[Kim170464]

My husband is 53 years and was has secondary liver and lung cancer, he had all his treatments but the cancer grew more,on the 17 of December 2009 he had stomach obstruction and had to undergo surgery.. the wound has not yet healed. the doctors asked us to take him home and keep him comfortable.. can anybody help!! he suffers with very dry mouth and also cannot drink or eat as he brings this up..what can I do??  thank you and god bless

[liver4]

My brother was diagnosed with liver cancer on Dec 4/09 at which time his entire liver is covered with little cysts and 1 large cyst which grew 1.8cm x 2.5cm to 12.8cm x13.6cm(the mass is 2/3 the size of his liver) within 2 weeks while we were waiting for biopsy results.  There is no treatment available to him no transplant as well.
He has been moved to palliative care and I imagine will spend the rest of his days there.  He eats a little bit and is drinking, but I am so afraid this will end soon.  We spend as much time as we can every day with him.  Like someone said earlier, just spend quality time with them and tell them how much they mean to you every day and try to make them as comfortable as possible.  My brother is a real fighter he will not give in.

[MrsPrimetime]

My husband just passed away from liver cancer on January 21, 2010.  He was only 42 years old.  He was diagnosed on 11/30/09 and was first told that he may have 6-12 months.  On January 19 he went to the hospital complaining of severe back pain.  His body was VERY jaundiced and I knew things were very bad.  The ER doctors did a lot of lab tests and asked for a urine sample.  His urine was the color of tea - a sign that the kidneys weren't doing what they should.  When the doctor came in to talk to us, he said that it was just a matter of a week or so.  That "week or so" turned into a couple of days.  His kidneys completely shut down late Wednesday/early Thursday (1/20-1/21).  He died at 9:20 pm on Thursday.  He was sleeping from the time he was admitted to his hospital room to the time he left this world.  I miss him (we were high school sweethearts; together for 27years), but I know he's not hurting and suffering anymore.  I'm so glad that my 17 year old and 13 year old sons got to say goodbye on that Wednesday.  After he talked to them, he was completely unresponsive until the time of his death.

[ilovemyma]

My mother was diagnosed with colo rectal cancer and then with secondary liver cancer on May 2008. She is in India right now fighting with the monster. She was under chemotherapy since she was diagnosed but had to stop chemo last month since she was not willing to take it as the aftereffect was very very painful. Recently she was detected with high jaundice ( bilirubin - 10.2). She has also started retaining water in the stomach and the doc says theres nothing much we can do. she also sleeps a lot but is in her senses. and now i can see the end is coming fast. I have never imagined i will lose her so soon. she is just 59 yrs. but i am still praying to god and still waiting for a miracle to happen.

[liver4]

My brother passed away yesterday from his liver cancer.  He was walking around with the aid of a walker days before he died.  He did not turn jaundiced nor was his urine dark.  I imagine the pain was just too much for him.  During his stay in palliative care never once did he complain about the pain or anything for that matter.  His last day he was sleeping quite a bit and in much pain you could see it in his face. My other brother was with him when he died so he was not alone.  My biggest fear.  Finally now for him the pain is gone and he can rest peacefully.

[Sana600]

After reading all ur posts , i feel its not just my mother..all of u have felts the same pain. My mum turned 52 on 2nd of feb and suffering from metastatic breast cancer -liver-bone. She is in her senses but sometimes suffer from memory loss .She continously retains fluid in her body .Doctors are still giving her chemo but i think its not making any difference, She is on bed all the time. I feel helpless like never before.

[angellove123]

I just wanted to say to you all here on this forum that I completely understand how you  are all feeling.  My Mum and best friend died in Jan 2010 from secondary liver cancer.  It was a month to the day from diagnosis to her death and my heart breaks day after day.
It was so very quick that we have not had time to get our heads around this devestating loss and although she is now out of pain my selfish side still aches for her to be here with her beloved family and friends.
Love them each day and talk to them and most importantly have no regrets.
God bless

[scarlet0911]

I just want to say that I completely feel what you guys and beloved ones have been going through. I'm a stage IV gastric cancer patient and I'm 22. 1 month ago, my docs told me the cancer cells spread to my liver, uterus, lungs, and kidneys. Last week my liver stopped working, and now kidneys. I refuse to take morphine as I think it may expedite the death, so I'm basically dealing with the pain w/o any medical help. The docs sent me home and told me to do whatever to make myself comfortable, and yes I do sleep a lot and don't eat as I can't keep food down. However,I don't want to give up just yet, and I believe there is miracle, so don't lose hope.
God bless

[TRyan]

My Grandma is 100 years old and in the Nursing Home, she had cancer surgery 1 year ago, the cancer has spread more than likely to her liver, loss of appetie and her color is jaundice and tired all the time. The family has choosen not to tell her. She has been alone for 52 years on Feb. 21st, she has been ready to go for about the past 5 years.

[fben13]

My mom was diagnosed with liver cancer on Oct. 2008, which was devastating.  She had TACE done on Feb. 25, 2009........it all seemed to be going well, the tumor had shrank.  On Nov. 2009 her doctor did an MRI to see how it was all going, we were very confident that everthing was going to be fine, since faith is the last thing you lose.  But the cancer had become very aggresive (aggressive) and he told me that she had 3 o less months to live.  It was the worst news, I couldn't believe, I just didn't have the strength to tell her what the doctor really told me since she didn't speak English.  When we were leaving the hospital I held her hands and my hands were ice cold, that she said to me what was wrong...........I couldn't speak and she said to me by the look on the doctors face and mine she knew something was wrong.  Well since we come from another part of the world, she wanted to go home to spend Christmas and New years there.  It was very hard for me to let her go, because I knew we were going against time.  She was there, those months were the worst of my life.  On January 18 my sister went to be with her, on the 24 I left to be  with her and a week later my other two brother went too.  We went to take care of her, to be there till the end.  But you always have this wish that things are not going to be like the doctor said, even though we saw her health declining, she was very jaundiced, losing weight, sleeping more, restless nights and very swollen of the ascites.  Even so she had the strength of going away with us to these cabins on the country side, it was a very peaceful place with mountains, she just loved it there.  We left to that trip on Thurs. feb. 11, 2010 and were coming back on the Sunday............She was on palliative care and the Doctor and nurse urged us to take her, to do all the things she wanted to do.  She seemed so happy and at peace, on Sat Feb. 13 2010, she started vomiting blood.  I will never forget that day, the nurse came to that place to make her more comfortable , to stop the bleeding and give pain medecine.  The nurse said after she becomes stable we could take her home, but God called her to heaven, she passed away.  There were so many mixed emotions and so much sandness.  But after you think about it, she did everything she wanted , she was at a place she loved so much and now she is not suffering any more, that becomes some comfort..............The sadness will be with us for along time, the memories will be with us for ever.  She is very much missed but she is resting in Gods arms.  If anyone reads this just wanted to share my experience, I was with my mom taking her to doctor since the beggining, wetn through the whole process with her, had many tiring days but I wouln't change it for anything because I now know I did everything for her.  And for that now I have some peace in my heart, the only sandness I feel is not having her, not listening to her voice or her touching my hair, simple things.  Sorry for wrting so much but just wanted to tell my experience, so everyone  going threw something like this, just spend as much time and do all you can for that person.  At the end there is a reward.......and that is peace.  My mom passed away at the age of 74, she was a fighter till the end.,  God never abandoned her!  Thanks.

Francis

[SANDY1001]

My husband, who will be 67 tomorrow, has tumors in his liver.  He has an extensive medical history and, we understand, should have been on a liver transplant list years ago.  (He has Hemochromatosis.)  He also is diabetic, has had shingles, triple heart by-pass, surgery to close a hole in the chambers of the heart, a stroke, another heart attack requiring additional stents, stents in the abdomen for his legs, etc., etc.  He has had 2 procedures in the last 2 months to remove the tumors in his liver: ct guided ablation and chemoembolization, and they will keep coming, we are told.  He has, in the past week, lost use of his legs (unable to walk), but is now able to walk a little, but mostly sleeps and has lost his appetite.  He is on steroids to give him some appetite and strength, but he is suffering from overall weakness.  Hospice wants to sign him up and the doctors and nurses I have spoken with agree.  He seems afraid.  He is still passing urine (dark) but has not had a BM in 10 days (not eating).  Anyone give me any idea at what stage he's in and how long we may have him with us?  We are raising a 9 year old granddaughter whose father died before she was 10 months old, so to her, this is the only father she has known.  I need to know how much time we are looking at...for both our sakes.

[Busboy56]

My father battled Colon Cancer and secondary Liver Cancer for 22 months. He passed away peacefully February 25th, 2010 at the age of 53. I used this forum for weeks to try and figure out when and how everything will happen. I cannot explain the sadness one goes through watching a loved one pass away to this disease, knowing there is nothing you can do.

The pain was beyond anything I can describe and left my father uncomfortable to the point he couldn't put a goodnight sleep together for the final two months.

He had the fluid drained every week for the last two months and lost all the weight in the same time.

We admitted him to the hospital on Monday the 22nd and he was gone three days later. He had not eaten in over a week and began vomiting dark liquid. He did get some rest in the hospital due to the drugs but I believe the drugs are what sped it up his death. The fight and courage my father and every other cancer patient shows is such an inspiration. They are all in a better place and forever in our hearts!

[daddysgirl86]

my father was diagnosed with stage 4 colon/liver cancer march 2009, doctors said he would have about 2 years to live.  With him being so young (46) and being so healthy, (no smoking, or drinking) i thought he'd beat the odds.  He went through tons of chemo treatments the past 13 months.  3 weeks ago his doctors said there is nothing more they can do for him and expected him to live a few months.  Over the past week i noticed that he was becoming jaundice, which means his liver is failing.  My mom told me that we are now down to "weeks" :(.  Symptoms that i have noticed are jaundice, confusion, and he is becoming more weak.  I am hoping and praying for a miracle of somesort to happen! This is the hardest thing i have ever had to go through, and I pray for a cure from this nasty disease because nobody should have to go through all this crap!  Thoughts and prayers go out to everyone! God Bless

[Tracon]

My Father was just diagnosed with stage 4 colon/liver cancer two weeks ago...

He has been suffering from hiccups that have been making him throw up anything he has eaten, they gave him some Graval which has helped a little bit...

He is very jaundice but still seems to be all there, he says he doesn't feel any pain.

The doctors say he won't make the end of summer...

This is the hardest thing I have ever lived with in my life...

I hope he doesn't suffer too much in the end...

Sechelt BC Canada...

[worriedone94]

Im worried about my dad, he was dignosed with colon cancer last August, after 4 months of chemo and a resection all seemed well!, after a scan in Feb he was told there where shadows on his liver.  he had a scan last week with results next Wednesday, but he is really well and putting on wieght, is this normal, I am worried sick

[cesugah]

greetings to all and MAY GOD BLESS AND STRENTHEN YOU. My husband age 50 has end stage liver cancer. I am a RN, so I know all the medical terms and jargon...I know he doesn't have long. I am having a hard time watching him be depresssed and he is hoping for a HEALING, God can do anything but if it is not in HIS will, the cancer will continue to progress and my hisband will die.  He has began to LOOK WASTED and tires easily. I know the end is near. ALL WE CAN DO AS LOVED ONES is to be there for them. LOVE them and make sure their medical team gives them adequate pain medication. Dont hold back on the medication for fear of progressing their death. Keep them as comfortable as possible because death is their only TRUE AND EFFECTIVE relief.  God can give them a body that can't be damaged by the ills of the world. SO give them their pain medication let them sleep, LOVE them and let GOD be their and your comforter.

[mat1986]

My father in law - to be, is in the final stages of liver cancer.  We found out 7 days ago.  It is past the point of chemo or any treatment.  He is on morphine patches and has just upped his doesage.  

His daughter and I are getting married in 5 weeks and we are unsure whether to go ahead with the wedding.  No one will give a clear indication whether he will make it or not,

Any ideas

[Papli]

My mum was diagnosed with liver cancer 2004 due to Cirhosis from Hep C and at 65 she was lucky to recieve a liver transplant 7 days after going on the list. She was blessed to have another 5 years. In February this year she became jaundiced and developed Acites (ascites) as a result of kidney and liver failure. We were informed by the consultants that her routine biopsy results over the last 2 years had indicated gradual liver failure. We were told she had months to live. I went this Easter with my family to spend some quality time with her, I partied with her on Saturday, had a burger with her on Sunday, Monday she became ill, Tuesday admitted to hospital and told she would not be comming home, Wednesday we were told that she had a week, she died the following Thursday. There are 4 stages towards the end, confusion and disorientation, inability to use limbs, vomiting and nausea, then pain followed by coma or death.  I write this because I hope no-one witnesses the sheer horror of the lack of sensitivity by the liver ward staff for some one in their care whilst dying. My mother died in pain, she was administered morphine which did not work, rather it escalated the pain, there was no doctor available to increase her dose or see her, her line was blocked so they could not administer any top up paracetamol and she died within 2 hours of morphine being administered still waiting for a doctor to see her for pain management. Registrar walked in 3 mintues after she had the most frightful end of literally vomiting at least 3 litres of blood bulging via her eyes, nose and mouth. He cerftified her dead, something i knew my self following what we had witnessed minutes before. My mum had been with them for week and half and despite numerous discussions with med staff, they were not able to offer her any pain relief or manage her pain in the last days at all. This is all she had asked of them. This lack of care and neglect continued throughout her stay. My mum was lucky in that she had a huge family network and we undertook all her care aspects 24 hrs a day due to the appalling care from the ward. I spent most of the time there and urge everyone please arrange hospice care for loved ones. I am a Social worker and in my 23yrs of professional role i have never come accross such disgusting regard from hospital staff for an older person dying. My mother could have had a peaceful and pleasant end, what she endured and what we visualised will haunt close family members because those last few hours were truly visually horrifying.

[baemail9]

My husband had secondary liver cancer.  he was told 3 to 6 months to live but only lasted  4 weeks.  He didn't need pain pills until 10 days before he passed.    Hospice came into our home 4 days before he passed,  Everything was so very quick.  He got on a pain patch and was given small doses of morphine the night before he passed.  I'm glad he didn't suffer long.  He was a very proud man, and a very tough man.  I think the fact that he needed help just to stand, broke his spirit.  He will forever be in my heart.

[Birabiro]

I lost my dad two months ago. He was a loving husband and dad. His death really devastated me. He was my best friend. I lost him of prostate cancer metastasized to the bone. He was under hospice care. We all there next to him when he passed away. If you have a sick loved one, just be there, make them as comfortable as they can be. No one deserves to suffer with pain. My prayer goes out to the people who are fighting with cancer each moment and to the care giver!!!!!!!!!!!

[Bootney]

MY mom is currently in the supposed "End Stage" of Liver Cancer. She was diagnosed about a year and a half ago. About a month ago the cancer spread to her spine and she has lost the use of her legs. She just turned 56 on june 16. Im her first born and only son and I dont know what im feeling right now. My sister takes care of her at home and I visit her as much as I can in addition to staying with her every other weekend when my sister works double shifts at the hospital. My mom is weak very skinny and always tired but she is Alert and happy to see me when Im there. She Believe that Jesus will heal her and I believe God will to but I also know that God has his reasons for doing the things that he does so Im trying my best to prepare (whatever that means).
Is there some sort of support group or a place where people exchange email address? My email is ***@****.

[mikeylottie]

i lost my dad to secondary liver cancer 9years ago.dad used to be a coal miner always suffered with a bad chest.docs said cancer probably started in lungs too damaged to see moved to liver.we were told 8th july 2001 that it was terminal.we all helped mum to nurse dad at home had help from mcmillan nurses who were wonderful.i made sure i spent as much time as i could with dad.dad always said he didnt have any pain but i wonder if he really did?my dad went into hospital on 17th august 2001 and passed away 18th august 2001 just 6wks after he had been diagnosed.in the end everything just shut down and dad was on morphine.i just wanted to say my heart really goes out to each and everyone of you who is going through same thing.it was the worst time of my life but dad always had a smile and was the bravest person i know.miss him every day.god bless dadxxxxxxx

[connie1982]

My mom was diagnosed with colon cancer on Feb 26 2010. They removed that cancer, but found it had spread to her liver. They said it could not be cured, but chemo might give more time. She tried it ,but it did not work. This is so difficult.A month ago they said a month or two.  Right now I am in the middle of a nite mare with hospice and some family regarding medications, they are overmedicating her to the point she knows nothing. On days I am there she goes outside , laughs, has great conversations and is herself. It is killling me because I feel as if I am failing her by not being there everyday but cant.(everyother) //she shows a lot of end time symptoms but usually on the days she is medicated. So i'm not sure what is the cancer and what is the meds. She hates being "stoned" and would rather have a little pain and enjoy life then be like they have her. I do not know what to do. God bless all of you

[blooeyes379]

To all out there I hope you get through these difficult times & never stop beleiving in what is possible!! x

[angelodottir]

Papli --
First, let me say that I am sorry for the loss of you mother. Second, thank you for sharing your experience.

I am in the throes of such an experience with my 68 year-old father. What you experienced happening to your mother in the final moments was truly awful. I worry that even with pain management, this may be the fate of anyone having liver failure. I'm here reading this post to be prepared as I can for what is to come.

Who wouldn't rather have their loved one drift away with dignity instead of struggle in terror. What I don't know is, as a caregiver, how can one help. I know that the dying person needs to know that it's okay to go and they should have their pain managed fully. What else can one do?

At the moment, my father hasn't entirely given up eating or drinking. When his pain is managed, he is still very aware. We didn't ask for a timeframe. It didn't seem appropriate. But, of course, one wonders.

I've read the "giving up or letting go" pamphlet, but it didn't tell me what to say when he looks at me with his yellowing eyes and asks, "What about keeping up with my vitamins?" I'll I could muster was, "We can do whatever you feel up to."

He's physically too weak to endure more treatment, but his mind and will are still strong. He says he's lived a good life, but I can tell he has a way to go before accepting something other than living. I just want to support his journey without seeming to hold him back or push him forward.

[sisinnola139]

My sister has melanoma cancer which now is in the liver. She fortunately has excellent medical insurance and is taking experimental medications. She is now though very ill with fluids on the stomach and renal failure. She had to be hospitalized for the fluid retention as her skin is splitting. She has 60 pounds of fluid. Anyone have any clue is this a sign of the end or is this some random complication to her new tumor drug sounds like tycol (sp). She has volunteered for so many treatments some which were extremely awful on  her. Anyway I don't live in the same town and would need to fly in to be with her but as so many times she has been ill its hard to make a decision if this is it or what?  I would hate to not have a chance to be with her. The doctor advised her to set up hospice.

PS Note when my sister had her ocular melanoma discovered the doc's advised if she went 4 years without it spreading it was good news. Be aware that in this cancer it seems to always spread in a few years. Make the most of your life in that time because it will rear its ugly head. Wish we had known that then...Good luck hopefully my sister's volunteering helps someone else down the road.

[bandit44]

My father is in the last stages of liver cancer. The Dr's say it is colon cancer (he beat it 7 years ago) that has moved to his liver. He is at home and is sleeping more and more. The hospice nurse said he would continue to do this and eventually fall into a coma and not wake up. We just do not want him to be in any pain. My parents have been married over 50 years, and the past few months they have been acting like teenagers. Going out on more dates, seeing movies when possible, etc...  I am confused as why good people such as my father get this kind of stuff, but .... You have to live life to the fullest and let people know you love them. Thanks for letting me respond.

[GeezLouize75]

I would get to my sister as soon as possible if you want to see her before she passes.  My sister (now passed) had stage IV Rectal cancer and she began retaining the ascites fluid and within a few weeks, she was gone.  She had a drain put in and we drained it but after 3 weeks of that, she died.  Good Luck to you and your family and God Bless.

[Gynob001]

My wife had colorectal cancer 8 years back and last year she had a reccurrence and it has spread to liver and lung. After initial chemotherapy, she stopped responding. yesterday she had an unsuccessful SIRT provedure. she is weak, sleeps a lot and is slowly dying in front of me. We have been married for 36 years. While she doesn't have pain, she just developed symptoms of jaundice. I don't know what to do or expect.

[GeezLouize75]

I feel for you and her.  My sister also started sleeping alot at the end.  My sister signed up with hospice.  She was given morphine for pain and several weeks later she passed peacefully in her sleep.  She had also developed jaundice.  Just be with your wife and try to not let her see your pain.  God Bless you and your Wife. God is with you both.

[dreamgazr]

My beloved has stage 4 liver cancer. The situation is this, do to family obligations I needed to move from where he lives (which is very difficult being as far away as I am). Upon returning from a recent visit to see and take care of him, the information or lack of from him is so vague. He mentioned eventually becomming delusional (sp?) which is concerning as he is alone most of the time. He has family (two grown sons) close by, but from what I understand don't really come by too often. His liver/abdomen is distending, has nausea which he takes meds for, has major fatigue. The one great thing is his spirit! I am returning next week for another care visit and to just be with him and share the laughter. I feel its nearing the end...can anyone share any more info on what could occur sypmtom wise? Thanks for reading/sharing.  

[allmymarbles]

Chemotherapy does not help with liver cancer.

[debs2011]

I have a 23 year old friend who has gastric cancer that was found to have mestatised to the liver, adrenal glands, ovaries & bones in the spinal region on Feb 5 2011. She is home with us now, but she has jaundice, fluid retaining in the stomach, swollen feet, itches all the time and forgets things and sometime says things that aren't real. For the past 2 days she has lost her appetite & will eat a few spoon in the morning but nothing else. She hasn't gotten out of bed except to go to th ebathroom (with assistance). I wonder how much longer she has & what to expect in the time left.

[joan494]

Our situation seems to be very different from everyone who has posted here. My father was diagnosed with colorectal cancer in August 2008. After surgery, he had radiation which we think was responsible for the fact that he never regained normal bowel function. He was started on chemo (Xeloda) but had a severe allergic reaction called "hand-and-foot syndrome" - the cells leak fluid and the skin turns bright red, peels, and blisters. So no more chemo.

The following year, they found tumors in his liver. He delayed biopsy and treatment because he knew he couldn't/wouldn't take more chemo. By the time they resected the three tumors, one of them was huge and probably would have killed him within weeks (it was wrapped around an artery).

October 2010 - they found a small tumor in his lung. When doing pre-op work-up, they did an MRI and found that the tumors had recurred in his liver. Surgery canceled. No further treatment available.

November 2010 - had a stroke. Now paralyzed on left side. We learned afterwards that cancer increases the risk of stroke. Sent home to start in-home hospice.

Here we are at the end of Feb. Four months. He is very, very thin and completely incontinent. He has periods of extreme confusion but most of the time he is completely lucid. No pain. No apparent change in his condition for the past 3-4 months. No jaundice, no concentrated urine. He does sleep a lot. His appetite is still pretty good.

I don't see any sign of this ending anytime soon. Not that I want him to die, of course, but this isn't life. It is slow-motion death. I know those of you whose family members went fast would have liked more time, but I have to tell you, for the sake of the person with cancer, going fast is really better. Actually, for the sake of the family, too.

[Joan484]

Just an update on my father. It is now end of March, five months since the stroke. Not much change. Appetite has decreased a little, he sleeps a little bit more. No one can tell us anything. We have no idea what is going on.

I am just guessing that the nearly total lack of nutrition (whatever food goes in comes right back out) is causing the cancer cells to multiply very slowly, or at least more slowly than would normally be the case. So the tumors are growing slowly.

Cancer *****. If this ever happens to me, I will find a way to end my life before I am completely bedridden and helpless. There is no dignity or peace in a death like this.

[isamom373]

I want to thank you all for posting your stories.  It has help me process everything.  After getting off the phone with my mother...I now know it will be a matter of days before she is with her heavenly Father.  I am so grateful my daughters and I got to see her a few days ago.  

My mom started out having colon cancer and combated it with 6 months of chemotherapy.  During the therapy, she complained to the "NC Duke doctors" of having side pain.  They dismissed it and said it was from her colon healing from surgery.  Turns out they should have paid attention to their patient more...it was stage 4 liver cancer.  Right away she had a liver resection to remove most (not all) of the cancer.  She has runned out of time to combat the cancer with more chemotherapy.  She was admitted to the hospital with "tumor fever".  The oncologist also discovered that the tumors had come back even more in the liver and within the abdomen.  She had two drainage tubes inserted to remove the bile and other fluids from the liver.  She started to become very jaundice.  She left the hospital to stay with my brother after two weeks in the hospital.  I think everything that could be done was done.  Her skin is now orange, urine tea colored, burps, thirsty constantly, on pain medications, exhausted, and her mental state is sufferering.  

I am glad to learn she will probably pass away in her sleep.  I hope so.  I watched my husband pass away from leukemia.  It is very difficult to see family suffer, but it is a part of life.  Make the cancer patient as comfortable as possible.  Be strong for your other family members...extend lots of grace!!!!!  No one is perfect.  So make peace and love one another as Christ loves you!  Blessings,  Nicole

[charbryan]

My mother-in-law spent 10 days in a small local hospital.  Got dx with hemochromitoios and then they changed their minds.  Her brother has had a liver transplant. they finally sent her to Duke. They kept her one day and sent her home for in home chemo, which cannot start til her strengh is up.  Her stomach is very sore when she eats.  Her legs are swollen, we thought because of the water around the heart, conjestive heart failure.  She seems to have been weak for a while.  The Drs at Duke did not say much about her condition, stage or prognosis. After reading this I am even for concerned.  Thankfully she is a born again Christian and has served God all her 78 years. My father-in-law's first wife of 48 years was lost to cancer 10 years back, really hope he, and her, are not going to have to go thru this.

[suaimhney]

Hi Joan

Hope you get this. It is now about 6 weeks since you last posted but I would be interested in hearing how your fathers condition has progressed.

My boyfriend and I are in similar condition with his father. The final stages have now gone on for four months and we (and his wife) are struggling to cope at times.

As you say, it's death in slow motion. I have never experienced anything so cruel. Katie

[BonnieMo]

My mother died Jan, 2010 with lung cancer ( actually renal and cardiac shut down as effects of radiation on throat and chemo poisoning)
The day my mom was buried, my dad had a stroke. The day we put him into the hospital to find out what caused the stroke revealed he had lung and liver cancer. He received chemo for awhile, but now just wants it to be over so he can be with my mother.
He was referred to hospice when he stopped chemo - which is normally only referred to those who can expect to live 6 months or less.

We had many questions and were referred to the booklet noted below:
http://www.hospicesantacruz.org/HCP.booklet.English.09.pdf
That site has a booklet that has answered many of our questions about what to expect in the last months of cancer.

[catriona234]

hi i just lost my mum 9 weeks ago to secondary liver cancer. My sisters and i only got a few hours notice as the hospital thought they were treating my mum for gallstones. She became quite stressed on the friday night and had started to hillucinate and when the doctor came round on the saturday morning he said she would only last a few hours. she died at 2pm.

[shill007]

Hi all, I seem to be different ot you all as I am the paitent i have secondary livery mets from beast cancer, i am 42. I think im now in the fial stages i had been diagnosed with 3 moths maybe but things have changed his last 2 days, with alot of sleeping arrythmia has gone mad i feel very sick and faint all the time. i sweat alot too. so who knows i feel instintively that its coming to and end i knew each time the cancer had spread too and where too im quite intuitive and in touch with my own body. its hard to find info on the net about liver mets, theres not much info for symptoms thanks to you all for sharing as it does help to pick thru it all and find out what might be happening to me.

[emma551219]

My dad (64)had a stomach cancer two years ago.Doctors removed all of his stomach and said that nothing else was afectet and never gave him chemo.One year after surgery cancer came back above his left kidney and on his esophagus.sence the cancer was small dr said they will do aggresive (aggressive) chemo.Aggresive (aggressive) they did...My dad was taking it so bad and made him realy sick,his blood count was all over chart but my mom would mange to get it back to somewhat "normal range".After his last (third) dose of chemo my dad was so week that he couldn't walk anymore,he couldn't go to toilet on his own neither...He was in diapers.In hospital they gave him two bags of blood but it didn't help.They also didn't change his dipers so my dad ask to go home.And they let him do so.By that time in hospital he developed jaundice ...When my mom ask why she was told that is after chemo effect.Two weeks after he came home jaundice didn't go away his blood results were worst and worst.Still his gastroenterologist was saying that he will be ok and that is just chemo working.I live in Canada but my family is in Europe.So my mom ask dr againe is dad ok "cause I'm far and it takes time to book a flight.Dr asured my mom not to be worried.That was on the sunday.Monday they check his blood and my dad's family dr said it's very bad.But that he will check his billirubin's on thursday.Tuesday same week my mom told me that dad's stomach is swolen and his feet that he didn't urinet sence sunday but did have BM.Dad also said to my mom that he is kind of halucinating.By the evenig same tuesday he was making no sence in his talking,yelling and trying to push someone away even do that person wasn't there.He had few spoons of soup and fell asleep.Wendsday (today) he is in coma not reacting to my mom or any talk or questions.My mom called gastroenterologist more then dozen times dr didn't even had a disancy to call back.Finally she called emergency ,they refuse to take him to hospital to ,refused to insert catatar to empty his blllader,gave him morphine shot and told my mom that there's nothing to be done and it's just a matter of hour or days...Bottom line is dr told mytwo days ago mom he will be fine,cancer is gonne...Today two days later I've found out my dad is dying and that I won't probably make it to his death bed ,probably his funeral neither.I'm very angry at dr and medical stuff that pride themselfs in humanity and helping sick...It looks that my dad had secondary liver cancer or as  far as I'm concerned they have killed him with chemo.Be awere people,if you see your loved ones getting worst.weeker,depresed and dr is saying evrything is fine don't listen.Listen your loved ones and your heart.I have bought the ticket and will be livig on monday and be in Europe by friday noon time.Hope my dad still waits for me...I want to say how much I love him,that I'm sorry and to say thanks for being my dad and that he was the best dad one girl could have.Love you dad....Wait for me,dad just a few day longer,I"m comming....

[emma551219]

I wrote aboute my dad 1 hour ago( 2a.m)...Couldn't sleep...I have called my mom back to Europe(8 a.m there )...I called my mom to see how is dad...She said he had died.Funeral is tomorrow at 2 p.m.My dad's body is inside the house and I can't even be there,I can't even kiss him,tell him I love you....My mom told me he was in coma with his eyes open looking at a sealing,breathing heavily,puffing air out more then breathing...She told him to hold on that I'm comming on tuesday and then he started puffing the air out even harder.And as she was talking and holding his hands he just stoped breathing closed his eyes and he was gonne.Just like that...I'm all alone in my house ,I have no one to call or talk so  I appologize if I'm a bit to much but I have to say to someone.All my family is in Europe,beside my dad where I should be  as well... at least I wouldn't be alone in my pain....My dad passed away few hours ago.I can't belive it.Three days ago he was just fine.Now I don't have him anymore and will never say my godbyes or see him again waiving at me on front of the old house.That's where I saw him last time  almost a year ago.Hope this helps someone to  know how little time some people have and how preciuse is every moment.

[sadgirl847]

Last year my 78 year old mom was diagnosed with colon cancer.  Her first treatment was radiation.  When that didn't work, she had surgery to remove the mass and had a colostomy done.  Her rectum and portion of her intestine were removed and the remaining intestine rerouted through a opening on her side.  This was a major life change for her she was an active person.  However, in May 2011, cancer cells appeared on her liver.  She had been on chemotherapy since June 2011.  Last week her white cell blood count and platelets were dangerously low.  She ended up in the hospital where they tried to bring up her white cell blood count.  They could not after a couple of transfusions or injections of platelets.  She was also bleeding internally (platelets are blood clotting agents).  The Doctor decided to take her off chemotherapy because the side effects (low white cell blood count/platelets) were doing more harm than good.  But, with no chemotherapy, the cancer is spreading at an alarming rate.  The Doctor gave her about one more month to live.  While on chemo she lost considerable weight

[sadgirl847]

Sorry, I hit the wrong button.  However, she gained about 10 lbs. since a couple of weeks ago.  I'm trying to figure out why.  Her doctor is not a good communicator and has not given us much information.  So we ask others and I look up information on internet.  She is home with us and we have not called hospice yet.  My sister, another lady and I will be caring for her.  Her last stay in the hospital was a terrible experience once they found out the Doctor was going to call hospice.  They did not want to provide her with any service at all to the point of not cleaning her room!!  I'm also looking for information on what's next.  She dozes off alot and walks with a walker or is in a wheel chair.  Her hands and feet are col.   The bottom of her feet are numb (another side effect of the chemo).  Her hair is thin but she still has some left.  I plan to be with her as much as I can and make her life as comfortable as possible.  I'm urging family members to come see her or call her.  She loves visits and talking to people. May God Bless all of you and your loved ones.

[angelinagiannasca]

My name is Angie I live in Palm beach county Florida.My husband Billy who is 55 got a liver transplant in march 2007 at Jackson memorial Hospital in Miami.He s had a couple of roadblocks but always pulled through.We went for a check up in Miami the end of September and we were told his liver was starting to fail...we know that it was starting to show some scarring..but we were kind of shocked.they do not give a second liver anymore especially if its due to cirrohsis.I had no idea that it would start to fail so soon,,the doctors said he s been pretty lucky they have seen a liver start to reject after 3 months..he has hep c and that always stays in your blood they say..I just dont know how long he can survive know that its starting to fail....I  have read all the comments here and it helps to know there are many people out there with similar stories....thanks for listening or reading lol    :)

[jute52]

My mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in May 2011. I have one brother and two sisters and I am the youngest daughter. The doctor told all of us at the appointment that she had 3 to 6 months to live. I decided to quit my job and take care of her full time and we were to take one night a week and one weekend a month. It ended up being me most of the time.
We are now into November next week is Thanksgiving and she is still hanging on. I really don't understand how. She has hospice here twice a week I really don't like some of the nurses I wish they would let you choose one of your choice because I liked one of them so far and I wanted her for my mom all the time but she advised me that is not allowed. My mother has not ate a thing for over 6 weeks now she sleeps all the time. I keep track of how much she drinks its only a half a cup of liquid per day if that. I don't know how she can even get up but she does she moves around she talks sometimes out of her head talks about my father alot and he has been dead for over 6 years. She calls me all kinds of names. My older sisters are tired of helping they think the doctor misdiagnosed her. I hate that they are putting all of the work on me. I have two teenage daughters that I need to care for but they don't seem to care. They say I don't like her anymore she will not take a bath and she doesnt care what she looks like. I am so lost right now and wonder why she still has any energy at all and what her body is living on if she is in the last stages it sure doesnt seem like it except for the not eating and not drinking. Its very frustrating to all of us but especially me. Hospice just keeps telling me oh she is doing good I just want to know its hard day after day not knowing I found this site and glad to hear some signs as hospice wont tell me anything and will not be open and honest with me they are so worried about her eating and having a bowel movement if I hear that one more time I am gonna scream. I just wish I knew because it is hard sitting her day in and day out and she seems fine but they tell me she is dieing. Thanks for listening if anyone can help me with some advise please do.
Jute

[birdie1983]

My husband has was told 19 October he had stomach cancer, up until last week he was down for chemo. We have since found out it is very aggressive and his spread to his lungs, liver and muscle. He is only 31 and was well in to his fitness. He went downhill from September and has been told he only has a few weeks. Last August 2010 he was told it was just an ulcer. I am in shock and just completely heartbroken. Its all so cruel.

[sweetiejackson]

I agree.  Going fast seems better than watching your loved one decline day after day and there's nothing you can do.  My husband was diagnosed with primary liver cancer 13 months ago.  Has been on hopice care for the past 7 months.  

[justme0302]

I know it has been awhile since your post.My husband will be 45 in 2 wks. He has Leomyosarcoma and  had surgery in 2009. The cancer came back in his liver and other areas. He has  not been able to work since last August and since christmas has been declining quickly.  We have 5 children the oldest is 23 and the youngest 4. It is so difficult to watch him waste away as he has always been a very strong man.  This time of waiting is very long and painful.  the past week his bowel movements have turned white and urine dark.  I don't know how much longer he has it is hard also to watch his kind and loving personality change.  He seems very irritated and angry sometimes.  I miss his smile.  sometimes i wish this was over but I don't want a minute to go by without him.  

[peterson520]

This site has been a godsend to me.  My stepdaughter was diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer 3 years ago.  She had her colon removed early, chemo was started to hopefully prolong her life, her diagnosises was terminal from the beginning.  In addition she is a drug addict. She removed all family members from knowing the full details; she has been in the hospital for the past four weeks and it doesn't look good.  She is not jaundiced yet, little appetite, sleeping alot and has been taken off all drip pain meds -- is on patches.  retained lots of fluid, can't do stents, has two bladder bags and she is still in denial.  The doctor told her yesterday that chemo is not an option anymore and recommended hospice -- she is livid and wants another doctor for a second opinion.  I hate to have her suffer in so much pain---

[stormee60]

Hi Justme0302
My husband was diagnosed with leiomyosarcoma in his shoulder that had spread to his spine in Nov 2010 he had radiation that shrunk it and kept it at bay until his spine pain became uncontrollable in Sept 2011, he then had the tumor removed from his shoulder and a spine operation to remove part of L1 vertibrae and put in two rods to strengthen his spine, we were also told he had spots in his lungs. Two days ago we went for a checkup and was told the cancer has moved to his liver. We have been told he has 12 months with no treatment or 24 months if he has chemo. At this stage he is 100% well so we are unsure if we should risk the chemo and decrease the quality of life that he has at the moment with the chance of extending it. My thougths are with you, my husband is 62 so are youngest child is18 so that makes it a little easier for me. Until you experience it you have no idea how you will cope but at the end of the day you just have to get on with it and accept what you cant change. Make the most memories that you can for your children. Kind regards Gail

[bakerymama]

My  son/law is end stage liver cancer. He is 32 years old.  Yes, this is sucha heartbreaking thing.  It is so hardto watch and feel there is nothing you can do.  PRAY PRAY PRAY....Miracles still happen and if it is Gods will to take them home , pray for comfort and peace in their hearts and yours.  He did everything...chemo, radiation, radiation implants, stents put in and more chemo.   But here we are.  He just started hospice 2 weeks ago.  Tough decision but it was the time. He has limited time left.  Keep posting on whats happening.  

[CaptainAsh]

    My Brother in law and best friend for over 50 years is going through the final stages of liver cancer as I write you this. I just left him and I reminded him of something we both desided along time ago. That was who are we to exspect to suffer less than our Lord Jesus Christ did. We both believe he is with him as he suffers but reasuring him that when he cant fight any longer he can turn and climb on our saviors back and he will carry him to paridise.As in life we have pain and sorry as in death we will gain strenth and understanding through Jesus Christ our Lord. Keep faith strong its not thier end but a new beginning of pleasure and love.   Captain Ash

[chatti6]

My Father in law was diagnosed with prostate cancer 7 yrs ago, got treated and went into remission. A year later he had a stroke and slightly lost his speech. In November 2011 he was diagnosed with lung cancer, and went through radiation treatment as they say, chemo would have killed him because he is 83yrs old. He did 6wks of radiation and on February 13,2012 a scan was taken and showed the cancer had spread to his liver. He was given 2months to live. Here we are April 25, 2012 and he is very weak, jaundice, incontinent, breathing is shallow, complaining of his back and stomach hurting, not wanting to eat or drink anything, but still able to talk and recognizes everyone. I believe he is in his hours, days, as we were leaving the nursing home that he resides in he reached out to us. I really don't like seeing him suffer. I only hope and pray that when God decides to take him that he does so in his sleep. I love you dad!

[1humera]

thanx for all of u for helping post , those who lost there loved ones , i can feel that pain. my father is also suffering from liver metatesis colon cancer , he have same symptoms of ending life , that all of u posted.i m feeling very upset helpless watching him in the worst condition. he use to be a strong person now he cannot stand alone, he need someone to help him every time.he is not under any medication just two weeks ago he diagnosed by the cancer.my father is 56, v r 4 sisters and 3 brothers i m the elder1 i m 30y.v all confuse for taking steps for his medication ,the procedure is very painfull and not trustable that dad will survive more.God knows better.my dad is not agree for chemo etc.Cannot understand what to do.....he is losing weight so fast from 78 kg now he is 56kg.

[Jojobean1]

I feel anger and depression. My husband is in his final stage of secondary liver cancer and I have an 8 yr old son who is sad that his dad won't be at his 9th bday. I don't understand why him!! This disease is evil and cruel. I feel your pain and wish you the best in your healing.

[Jojobean1]

I'm sorry for your father, I am losing my husband now to end stage secondary liver cancer. It is horrible watching my husband lose his mind slowly like this. I have questions similar to yours, not knowing is difficult. A part of me dies everyday.

[Tututei]

Hi! Jojobean,
You may consider to take your husband to Dr. Im Sung Min in Eatonville,WA

[klobiondo]

Im sorry for your loss.   I was noticing the simularities in your story, my 46 yr old brother was diagnosed with 4th stage liver cancer in Feb. Non operable. They gave him 8 mos. He tried a new cancer drug called Nexavar but it made him so ill they had to stop. After many visits to the hospital he had an abdominal scan & the dr said it was worse than he thought and gave him a month to live. He chose hospice at home. They came to the house & he began to take morphine & Ativan, and a pain patch. Things were going along ok than he started acting confused & very paranoid. He thought people were trying to chase him & kill him. He even tried to run out the door to get away, He ended up going to a hospice facility & his meds were doubled. Because he is only 46 he is still fighting for his life but getting more scared  & paranoid. Since his meds were upped he is so wacked out.  My heart is broken in peices watching him deteriate.  Hospice is keeping him pain free but he is so restless & tries to walk around & can barely comunicate,  Im so confused,  did he go on hospice too soon ?   One day hospice said to say our goodbyes cause he had all the end signs, even blue fingers, shallow breathing, than the next day he was sitting up.   They thought it was the end, but he is hanging on..

[klobiondo]

you are blessed to have your father at home to spend every last second with him. Im sorry you have to go thru this too.  My 46 yr old brother with 4th stage liver cancer, who also complained alot about his stomache hurting, wanted to be home but when hospice strted him on morphine and other drug combinations he became very paranoid & confused. The drs say its the cancer that does that. Im sad that my brother couldnt be at home where he wanted to be.    Now he is in a hospice facility and getting pumped up with meds..he still tries to walk around but something is clearly effecting his thoughts & motor skills. Its the saddest thing in the world to watch someone you love go thru this. One day hospice told us this was the end and to say our goodbyes, the next day he was sitting up eating. Hang in there. Be strong. :)

[klobiondo]

All you can do is be there for her. Talk to her, listen to her, or just sit beside her.   We were doing that with my brother who has end stage liver cancer, but he was getting so paranoid & halucinating that someone was after him, he tried to get out of the house and it got dangerous so he is now in a hospice facilty, still trying to walk out, lol... however he is confused & can barely comunicate to us. My family has been taking shifts to be with him and try to comfort him. Most of the time anything he says is childlike. I think the meds make them different. The drs say its the cancer. Im confused.  I wish my brother was home again.  Just be there, good luck & know you are not alone. Its the saddest thing for anyone to go thru  :(

[klobiondo]

Im going thru the same exact thing. My brother is only 46.   And because he is young he is fighting for his life with the strong parts of his body, but getting so confused & so scared.  He tries to walk a little, and the hospice nurses say this is normal, the toxins go to the blood and it effects his brain. If this is the end than why isnt he resting peacefully like everyone else says. They stopped giving my brother anything to relieve the toxins, and I dont know why. More calls to the drs and questioning the hospice nurses.its exausting and consuming. It breaks your heart in a million peices. Hang in there  :(

[klobiondo]

My brother also was diagnosed with liver cancer 4, sirrosis & hep C. Gave him 8 months, tried to give him a cancer pill called Nexavar but it made him worse. Nothing else they can do. Last test showed he had a month to live.  Well it's been a month. I knew my brother wouldnt go with out a fight either. He is a tough biker kind of guy full of life. He lived hard & fast. He is now in a hospice facility on all kinds of meds. We tried to keep him at home on hospice but he got real paranoid & started  hullicinating that people were after him, tried to run out of the house several times. He still tries to walk a little, he is putting up a good fight.  The drs say the toxins are building up and effecting his brain. Also his kidneys,  we visit himleveryday, sometimes twice. Its breaking our hearts watching him go thru this.   If the drs were rite he wouldnt be here. For some reason he is hanging on.  Hang in there & know your not  alone  :(

[klobiondo]

My brother also was diagnosed with liver cancer 4, sirrosis & hep C. Gave him 8 months, tried to give him a cancer pill called Nexavar but it made him worse. Nothing else they can do. Last test showed he had a month to live.  Well it's been a month. I knew my brother wouldnt go with out a fight either. He is a tough biker kind of guy full of life. He lived hard & fast. He is now in a hospice facility on all kinds of meds. We tried to keep him at home on hospice but he got real paranoid & started  hullicinating that people were after him, tried to run out of the house several times. He still tries to walk a little, he is putting up a good fight.  The drs say the toxins are building up and effecting his brain. Also his kidneys,  we visit himleveryday, sometimes twice. Its breaking our hearts watching him go thru this.   If the drs were rite he wouldnt be here. For some reason he is hanging on.  Hang in there & know your not  alone  :(