Life is no longer worth living

Basically I am a 23 year old girl who has been battling the question for whether or not I have cancer.  It all started when i felt a few lymph nodes and i had blood tests everything was normal.  I than went for a full body CT scan and it showed 4 enlarged nodes.  I biopsied one of the nodes the one that was the largest with the FNA and core needle and flow cytometry and it was all negative. I was so happy.  Well i tend to obsess over my health and i noticed on my report it stated a 1.1 cm supraclavicular node.  When i googled supraclavicular forget it everything from there was down him.  Every single website said cancer.  I can feel a few of my supraclavicular lymph nodes they dont feel that large however I got a second opinion today and he said they are slightly enlarged and he wants to give me a PET scan.  Well I know exactly what a PET scan is.  He is not concerned because he said if the biopsy came up negative than most likely the nearby nodes are negative as well.  Well I cannot take this anymore.  Just because you can feel your lymph nodes i didnt know you had cancer.  According to these websites you do.  I no longer feel 23 years old.  I feel like my heart cannot take this anymore.  Now he wants to see if I have a cancer somewhere in my body.  My poor mother was crying all day.  I cannot take this.  Im assuming i must have some kind of cancer. damn lymph nodes. i hate my life. If anyone knows what it feels like to go through this feel free to write.  i feel very alone in all this.

[turtle221]

I am sorry you are going through this.  Try not to google this stuff.  My doc told me that a little bit of information can be a dangerous thing.  I sent you a message to further talk about this without cluttering up the boards.

[rio_loathsome]

Hey. I know this is difficult, and I'm sorry you're going through all of this ****.  I've been through some scary medical situations, and I know they aren't fun.  The best thing to do is to not google anything, and don't listen to the cancer talk from friends, family, etc. And talk to your doctor.  Open communication is key, especially in this situation. When your doctor tells you something or talks about your results, question everything.  That'll help you understand, and make the doc understand how you feel.  Take care, and don't worry.  Worrying and stressing makes it much worse, trust me.

[fury6]

thanks for taking the time and responding.  Im at my wits end.  I feel great besides having these lymph nodes.  I hear about the virchows node are all supraclavicular nodes that node or is that 1 specific node does anyone know?