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Need help adjusting

Hi,
I live with my elderly parents (Mum 94 and Dad 86).  It was my choice to move in with them.  I have been in their home since Oct 2011.  I make meals, and do housework.  Mum has a personal support worker that comes 2 x a day.  
I just wanted to know, is there anyone out there that is in the same situation as me?  I would appreciate sharing with another the daily challenges I have.
Thank you.
6 Comments Post a Comment
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4851940_tn?1385441629
It is hard work, mentally and physically looking after elderly parents.  

Make sure that you get time to yourself, by going out with friends or do some leisure activity that you enjoy.  Getting a few days break away from your parents is also a good idea to recharge your batteries.  If your parents need constant care and attention, you would need to arrange someone to come and look after them.

There may be a support group for carers in your area.  I do not know what the position is in where you live with regard to being a full-time carer, but do look into it, as there may be a carers benefit that you could claim for.

It is very important to look after yourself and take care of your own needs and not be a complete slave to your parents.  Your health and welfare are just as important.

Best wishes.
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7100466_tn?1392035916
Thank you, it is very true that I have to put myself on the list for care too...
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4851940_tn?1385441629
Don't end up having a breakdown through it.  Don't allow yourself to get drained by physical and emotional stress.  

You need to look after yourself and your own needs.  

Find out if there is any support in your area and if the care workers can come more often to tend to your parents.  Do you have any relatives that can help?  Talk with your doctor if you are having any problems.

It may be that if your parents need a lot of attention, they may be better being looked after in a care home.  If that is out of the question, then you should talk about getting other people to come and help you.

By the age of your parents, I presume that you are no "spring chicken" and possibly have your own health issues.


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7100466_tn?1392035916
I put alot of guilt on myself that I don't do enough for them....I 50, and fortunately in good health and have a job and a good relationshipe with my partner, who lives with us.  He is a gift.  
I have always sought approval from my Dad, so in some ways I feel like I'm 10 again.  I grew up an only child of my Dad's. My brother is available for help.  I guess I am just feeling sorry for myself today.  
After a divorce I decicided to come and look after Mum and Dad, and I have trouble worrying about my parent's and our future.
Thanks for your feedback....
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4851940_tn?1385441629
Try and not put any blame or guilt on yourself.
I know what you are going through and how you feel.  I had a similar situation taking care of my parents without any support from my siblings.

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7958102_tn?1395761215
Just know that there are others out there that understand your situation completely. Though I'm a little younger (35) and your parents are a little older, my father recently had a double stroke that affected his memory and mood center, and my mother is in bad abulatory health and bad diabetic situation ... so at least to some degree I can also really understand.
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