all caregivers

[jo929]

this is not a question.
I made a comment to all caregivers, and i made a mistake, and put it on AR  post by mistake, so all of you care givers can read it there, as i dont think i could remember all of it now, I just wanted to commend all of you on your caregiving also, maybe some solutions    luck to all jo

[monstermommy]

Im 44,female,have 2 sons.one, the eldest went without oxygen at birth,aspirated meconium.He has severe cerebral palsy.I am the one and only caregiver.My break is when he goes to school.Special ed,he can go until he's 26,in michigan.Everybody on here is going to hate me.After my son was born I followed his father and we did some hard drugs.My family(brother and sisters)think I took drugs while pregnant and I caused all his pain and grief.I didnt.But I may as well have.I feel responsible for this child.He is still maybe 2 or 3 mentally.Im feeling kinda "beat up on" today.Ive never posted but boy do I relate.I told this lady at the health dept.God only gives the major stuff to the souls he knows are strong.I am at least strong....I have been really trying to get everything"together"and I didnt sleep last night and Im overwhelmed and feeling like a real **** because Im not ready for him to come home yet.I want some days just to me,where Im not feeding or diapering or batheing anyone but me...Some times I feel Im losing it,like I need to check into the nuthouse.I absolutely love my son,would never harm him in any way.He is how he is.And thats honest and funny(he does make me laugh)Im sure when we pass over he will be "whole"but its gonna be the same basic personality.If I think about it ,his love for me is unconditional.You dont find that everyday,or ever....So in a way ,God blessed me with him.He's always happy unless hes sick.I should be grateful. I just love his spirit so much.I love his brother as well,but he recently graduated,joined the army,needs me less and less.I wonder if anyone will read this?Somebody come thru with a short joke or somethin'......

[daveat50]

No jokes here but I did want to leave a short reply. Admitting to hard drug use probably will turn off a lot of people but at least you are honest. If you really didn't use drugs during your pregnancy, you have no reason to blame yourself for your son's condition. I never really liked that saying about God not giving you more than you can handle. We all struggle with the difficulties in our lives, more so at some times than at others. Sounds like you are having a rought time right now. I have been caring for a disabled daughter for 38 years, so I understand how it can wear you down sometimes now matter how much you love and cherish your child.  I also wonder sometimes what it would be like to have a day to myself. It's been so long I can't remember what it's like. If you really feel like you are losing it sometimes, perhaps you should reach out to someone for help -perhaps for some kind of counseling? Sometimes it helps to just to unload your feelings to another person - someone who won't judge you. Caring for a disabled child IS hard work and no one should make you feel guilty for saying so. And taking care of yourself is necessary for youto be a good caretaker for your son. I wish you well.......

[jo929]

May God bless and help all caregivers they deserve it.  luck  jo