How limited will I be after surgery?

[CindyJC]

I am a 42 year old woman. I have six children, and a husband who has had a traumatic brain injury. He was in a coma for 2 1/2 months had to learn to talk, walk, even eat all over again. that was back in 2005.  He will never be the same person I married.  I have been told he has a mind like a 13 year old.  He is very limited on what he can do. Now I have just been diagnosed with Chairi. I do not go a day without a headache. I feel I am drunk all the time.  my hand and feet are going numb.  Right now I am so frustrated.  I have to do everything and the thought of me being down just kills me. My Children are counting on me.  In the past I have to just push myself through the day just to make sure everything is done.  As for my support is limited.  My mother died when I was 5 and my Dad has never been around.  My children are my life.  I do have some good friends for support. I truly rely on my faith in my Heavenly father.  My Doctor said that I need to have the surgery but he is real concerned about my husband.  He knows him well.  He is the only that saved is life when he fell down the stairs.  My children are going to be help but My oldest has moved out he is 21. I have a 19 year old, a 17 year old, a 16 year old, a 13 year old, and a 11 year old. So they are old enough to help out a lot, but they still have their moments.  I just want to know how long it took for most people to get back with their life.  

[Ginnybfree]

Hello,
Just a few thoughts that may help. I work in Occupational Therapy in home health and have seen numerouse cases where the two adults in the home had health related struggles were able to get caregiver assistance thru their insurance company. It could be someone who just does simple meal prep and light house keeping during your recovery. Another thought, isprior to your surgery date, have a schedule made up with people(family/friends) who are willing to help fill in the gaps during your recovery. During this time, given the ages of your children, I am certain they will be conscious of themselves, cleaning, and pitching in more when needed. My church friends were an awesome source  of help and spiritual support when I recovered from some health challenges in the past. Having the recovery time and length of will have to be a wait and see thing, as noone can foresee what may lie ahead. Best to prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Regardless, its important to take care of you so that you can get your life back and continue to be the awesome mom and wife I am sure you are. GL to you, sending prayers to you and your.

[selmaS]

  Hi Cindy and welcome to the Chiari forum.

May I ask a few questions?  Why does your Dr feel you will benefit from surgery? Do you have any related conditions? What testing was done? Do you have a CSF obstruction?.....How do you typically heal?.....

Everyone is different and it depends on how you answer the above as to how your recovery might be....rushing to get back to a "normal" life may cause set backs....so it is best to take your time and allow your body to heal....outwardly you may appear to be healed in a relatively short time, but that is just the incision....inside it can take upwards of 2 yrs for the nerves to heal.....

[Initwithyou]

Also look into any help through the county you live, if you haven't already.  There may be some respite care or personal care attendants that your husband may qualify for while you are healing.  The more prepared you feel prior to surgery, the less that anxiety/stress will slow your healing after.

Also, selma, if you are reading this, I want you to know how much I appreciate you!  I read a lot of your answers prior to my own surgery.  You are heaven sent.