Need to vent; my miserable weekend

Hubby and I reserved tickets to see Aimee Mann, one of our fav singers, months ago. She was playing at a jazz club in San Francisco, and the date coincided with our 14th anniversary of being together. We'd not had a true weekend away from the kids where we actually went somewhere in about 5 yrs.

We live in the foothills of Sacramento, so decided to take Amtrak down to the city. We were staying in a hotel in the downtown finance district, where Hubby gets a good corporate discount. We wouldn't have to deal with daily parking rates, hourly parking rates wherever we went, etc that way.

Well, The problems started before we even got on the train. I turned my ankle on some uneven pavement at the old Sac train station. I didn't realize how bad it was, prob because of being on pain meds. Then we couldn't find forward-facing seats together on the train, so I got horrifically motion sick, despite taking Dramamine. I adjusted and was ok by the time we got to San Fran though.

We were pleasantly surprised to find that our hotel room had a king size bed. We'd reserved a queen room. We were soon disappointed to find out it was actually 2 hard-as-rocks twin beds pushed together. With the Giants playing the World Series and Fleet week+ lots of other stuff going on, there wasn't an option to change rooms. Hubby and I both had problems with the bed pinching nerves and our sides and legs going numb. No fun.

The first night, we went out to dinner and then to a movie. There were no cabs to be found due to the World Series game letting out. We walked about 2 miles at least until we finally found a cab. My ankle then let me know just how bad I'd sprained it. I was also drenched in sweat and freezing in the cold bay temps.

The 2nd day, we slept in, but mostly because sleeping was so difficult on that bed and we were both exhausted! We got a late lunch. I flat-out told Hubby no more walking. My stupid screwed up adrenal system wouldn't even allow me to walk downstairs from my hotel room to get a cab before my head was drenched in sweat. It was awful. After breakfast we walked around a little, but again, the sweating made me miserable. We sat down on a planter in Union Square and watched the Blue Angels fly jets in between the skyscrapers; very cool, but by that time I couldn't hold it in, and had broken down and was crying. My poor Hubby didn't know what to do with me. We walked until we found a cab and went back to the hotel. I rested and he watched TV.

A few hours later, we went to the jazz club via cab. We had dinner reservations beforehand. I arrived somewhat looking like a drowned rat and went to the ladies room to dry off my hair with paper towels. We had a good dinner, then went in for the concert. It was nice. We got to hear some great new material and really enjoyed ourselves. I was so wiped out afterward, that we just went back to the hotel even though it was only 10:00. I crashed and slept painfully and fitfully for about 10 hours. I was feeling too bad to do anything, so we just got some coffee and muffins and made our way to the Ferry bldg to catch our bus back to the train station.

While I enjoyed the concert, that's about all I did enjoy. I felt so awful, like I was completely ruining what should have been a nice, fun weekend for my Hubby. I know he tired of my complaining. That's how I always feel lately; like I'm sucking the fun out of everything when I do try to do stuff with my family. I can't handle doing anything, going anywhere. The sweating from my head has to be the worst problem of all. I look like a drowned rat within a few minutes of leaving my house. It's embarrassing and unbelielievably uncomfortable.

I just want to be able to enjoy life. Chiari has completely taken that away from me. I can't stand being a shut-in. I like to go places and do things. Life has been completely miserable for me this past year and things only keep getting worse.

Sorry to vent and whine, it just really *****.

[Stephiec79]

Don't feel sorry for needing to vent...especially here! My BFF got a million page text from me this morning because I'm an emotional mess! You need to let it out. This is extremely frustrating! You look forward to fun and exciting moments with your family, your friends, or just a romantic interlude with your significant other and something has to take away from that...a headache, numbness, fatigue, pain, for me it was a weekend away with my family this weekend and laughing was just too much for me and it killed me because it hurt to laugh at all the enjoyable moments with my family & friends!! How do you live your life without laughing???? I'm sorry you're feeling so frustrated, but feel free to vent away...don't ever hold it in, because that just makes you feel 10x worse (((HUGS)))

[selmaS]

Hi..I have to agree with Steph...u have to vent to let it all out...complain here and not to ur family at home...we do understand a little better....we can also relate as well.

I am so sorry u did not enjoy the entire weekend, so do try to focus on the positives of the weekend...u and ur DH got away together...u saw a great concert....if u can think of other positives add them to the list...forget about the negatives....

"selma"

[lu7997]

So sorry your weekend was so rough.   Really wish I could help.  Hugs hugs hugs.  

[taylapj]

I'm so happy that you got to actually go tho, all though not that you found it difficult, it's so easy not to do things because we know just what goes into a journey / night out and we also know that often we'll have to pay for it after a few days, i agree with every one you NEED to have an outlet for your frustrations, we don't have physical chariatiscs of a syndrome or condition [ apart from our wafty legs etc ] so people, and often those close to us can't always see there's a problem, i know for me, i struggle to have anyone to talk to, i try to talk to my partner but i swear he's getting bored of my obsession to get the right treatment, my friends have slowly drifted away more than likely because of my continuous no shows on nights out etc .... and well, the doctors will just label me as depressed, maybe i am i don't know, but i Know Chiari and related conditions is a life changing condition, and acceptance is the hardest struggle.

So when ever you can, if you can, do the things you love, and what a lovely relationship you have to still want to go for romantic weekends away x x

Hope your back in your comfy bed and somewhat recovering. Look back at that concert with a smile ;-D

[Jennyfoo]

Thanks guys. Im so glad i have somewhere i can vent and let it out. Hubby is sick of it too. To top it off, when we go home, we discovered that one of our poor pups had snuck back into our room and had hidden under the bed before we left. We leave the dogs home if it's only going to be a day or two. We have a dog door and we drag their dog beds into the living room and shut up the bedrooms. Well, poor Ivy got locked in our room. Thankfully the bathroom was open, so he had toilet water to drink, but he destroyed a 3' arc of carpet around the bedroom door, trying to get out. He also chewed up a blind and ripped one of the strings off the roll-up blackout blinds I sewed for that window. The fabric's been discontinued, so I'm gonna have to try to patch it as well as I can. Poor doggy. So we had to replace our bedroom carpet. Good thing we were planning on doing it next Spring anyway.

And boy have i really have paid for overdoing it too. Monday afternoon I developed the most horrendous headache from Hell. It won't go away! I've tried coffee, icing, lots of rest cuz I can't function with this bad a headache. It's an 8-9 on the pain scale; the kind where you just want to hole up in a dark, quiet room, and sleep forever.  These really bad HAs usually only last a day or so. Never this long before. I usually get at least somewhat better for a few hours so I can get things done. Imagine having to clear out a bedroom so new carpet can be laid, with this bad of a HA. OMG! I've also been having visual issues with this HA; double vision, cloudy vision, vision zoning out of focus etc. It's been just awful! I'm just glad that I didn't have this bad a HA while in SF. I'm glad Hubby and I got to spend some time together despite how miserable I was most of the time.

Again, thanks for "listening" and being there for me.

TTFN,
Jenn

[rod44]

Hi Jenn, it is very frustrating when you are looking forward to a weekend away like that and your health issues do their best to stop you from enjoying it. I am glad you have some good memory's, keep these and try and forget the bad.
I hope your HA will pass soon

Ray