11 yr old acting out sexually

[moose43]

I hope someone can help me..i don't know what to do..my daughter is 11 yrs old..shes been boy crazy since she was 9..always in love with a different boy..now I caught her with a friends 5 yr old son on top of her and they were acting like they were having sex. they had their clothes on but her pants were down and she did have her underwear on.. nowi find out from other friends she wanted to hump their kids and even asked one if he could put his private in her  mouth..thankgod he said no..shes denying all of this of course and she does see a therapist cuz she has adhd and odd..i have no idea how to deal with all this and just wanna cry...im considering having her home schooled cuz im afraid to have her around boys at school and god forbid pregnant at a young age..bad enough I have to stop hanging out with my friends to keep her away from their kids...shes been checked and she has never had anything done to her..thankgod so I don't know where she is getting it from. please does anyone have any advice how to handle this...ive tried talking to her about all of it but of course shes not going to tell me the truth.

[Sandman2]

   opps, saw that you said she is on meds, but fights you on it.   What is the problem?  Many times a certain med does not work as well and a slightly different one can make a big difference.   Also the extended release versions are usually smoother and the child doesn't have to take the med at school (if she is on the instant release ones.)

[Sandman2]

      Unfortunately, therapy doesn't happen overnight.   And the trouble is that she is only 11 and really doesn't have a lot of self control yet.  Of course, kids with ADHD have tremendous impulsive problems.  Meds do help with that - but have no idea if that is being used.
      Recently posted this on the ADHD forum to a parent.  You might find some of the links helpful.
                 I have included some links that hopefully you will find helpful.
    http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/1879.html
    http://www.additudemag.com/slideshow/74/slide-1.html?utm_source=eletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=June
     http://www.addresources.org/node/2014
     http://www.additudemag.com/slideshow/88/slide-1.html?utm_source=eletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=June

[moose43]

yes they did check he private out.i have spoken to her and so has her therapist and she insists nothing ever happened to her..that she learned it from the haunted house movie..i monitor what she watches   she does see a therapist though..and sandman2 I am dealing with her adhd and odd..she  is on medication..although she fights me on it and shes in therapy but I don't think any of it is helping..shes a handful

[Sandman2]

   Besides, all of the above good comments.  How are you dealing with the ADD and ODD as that is certainly part of the problem.  I am also the CL on the ADHD forum - http://www.medhelp.org/forums/ADD---ADHD/show/175
   Post to me over there is you need any help with the ADD thing.
   Also, Marks point on making sure that your therapist is aware of this is extremely important.  It may be that your therapist has a different view of this then you - so make sure that you are always in communication with the therapist.

[MarkLakewood3367]

Even though she denies having engaged in these behaviors, none the less, it is very important that you make sure the therapist is aware of these behaviors and works with her on issues of sexual abuse.  Just because she denies the issues doesn't mean the therapist stops working with her on these issues.  Therapists deal with denial everyday and should have the skills to overcome issues of denial. If this therapist is ineffective, it would be best if you search for a more qualified one. It is possible that she is a victim of sexual abuse herself and requires treatment.  It is best to work with the therapist in terms of what avenue to take or what to do in this situation.  

[AnnieBrooke]

It would seem that she has had some exposure to explicitly sexual imagery or activities.  You say "she's been checked and she has never had anything done to her," if you mean the doctor has looked at her vagina, some things that can be done to a child, don't show.  Have you thought of just talking to her calmly and gently to see where she learned what she is doing?