11 yr old pacifier

How abnormal/normal is it for a 11 yr old to still want to suck on a pacifier at night?  

[rebbecca]

i think it would be very abnormal, my son isnt 2 yet and he doesnt have a pacifier anymore.

[oldmum]

It seems quite abnormal to me, but I never gave any of my children pacifiers to start with.

If you however concider thumb sucking to be the same as pacifier sucking, my almost 12 year old daughter still sucks her thumb at night and when watching TV. We want her to stop but she won't!

Does your child still want the pacifier whilst sleeping over somewhere with other children?

[Pattyh1]

My 10 year old niece does the same thing. All I know is my brother is going to have a big orthodontist bill because it has ruined her teeth. I suggest that pacifiers are taken away at age one while they can be taken away. Maybe give her something to look forward to like pierced ears or  buy a body pillow to get cozy. And plan a funeral for all the pacifiers to put a closing to it.

[1nana]

It's very abnormal and I blame the parents.

[RockRose]

eb,  this is a little unusual,  but it seems harmless.  

[CMR_5]

I really think that it is abnormal. Since I don't know you, I just want to ask, does your child have any behavioral issues? If not, Letting your child throw away or have some kind of cerimony for letting the pacifier go. At older ages like 11 or so, your child should really be able to deal with not having the pacifier. I'm not a doctor, but I am a nurse and I have devoted much of my time to my own 3 children. I will not badmouth any parent who is going through this. It can be very hard if you don't have the skills to know exactly what to do.......but you are here for advice and help. I agree with one of the other posters about replacing the pacifier with something else that might be comforting. It's almost like taking the pacifier away from a baby or very young todler even though your child is older. It can be hard on parents because we love our kids so much and don't want to see them upset, but it's for the best and that is the way that you have to look at it. It can cause dental problems as well as social problems. It's best to break the habit asap. Another idea that may work if your child won't go for the going away party for the pacifier is to put something that doesn't taste good on the part that they suck on (ie. the stuff you use to stop nail biting or hot sauce) Whatever you decide to do, just stick with it and be consistant.

[kyle167]

I am a 18 year old kid and i had pacifier at night until i was around 13, it did not efect my teeth, my uncle is a child phsycoligist he told me this is more commen then most people think,your 11 year will give it up himself soon like i did dont worry about **** other people say .

[Rosie84]

I have to respond to this. My 12-1/2 year old daughter still uses a pacifier. She would be humiliated if her younger siblings or friends knew. She may not use them every night. I don't know if she uses them to fall asleep or in the middle of the night. Every time we have checked on her, she does not have them in her mouth. She is in the top of her class. She is an excellent athlete. She went away to science camp with her class for one week without them. She went to tennis camp this summer for one week without them. I am not worried that she will go to college with them. She needs them under her pillow. I think she is using them less and less. I drink coffee every morning. I look at it the same way. And yes, she is going to an orthodontist.

[Bibi2504]

Hi... I'm 29 yo and I'm a normal guy, except one thing... I still suck on a pacifier every night. I realize that's not a normal habit but I can't help myself. I don't bother anyone. I don't want to stop this habit. But if she really wants to give it up, she' ll do it herself.

[mommylove30]

Last year I saw my then 13 year old daughter sucking on one of her old pacifiers she had when she was much younger (about 3 years old).  I had a talk with her and asked her why she was sucking it and she said she had been sucking it on occasion for several years without my knowing.  I told her that I never heard of such an old girl still sleeping with a pacifier but I told her if she's going to sleep sucking a pacifier, I would have to replace the old and worn out one she had.  To sum it up, I replaced it and I still occasionally see her sleeping with it in her mouth but my husband and I don't say anything and it hasn't been an issue so far with the dentist.  Hope this helps...

[AkiraClaymore]

To be all honest with anyone here.  There's nothing wrong with sucking on a pacifier at night every night or even sucking on it when alone, its a very good source for comfort.  No matter how ANYONE puts it, even a 30 year old could do it and feel the same way.  I mean for goodness sake, its not like these people are sucking it 24/7 and in front of public.  I think you should allow your child to keep sucking on the paci' Just make sure you make some simple "rules" but I doubt you'll ever need to speak of those kinds of rules, most people who STILL suck on their binky don't just go out and say "oh hi, I'm sucking on a pacifier still, because I can, and I want to embarrass myself by showing you all"  In-fact some children like to hold on to SOMETHING because it comforts them, just like when you were little and you always watched your favorite cartoon and that was one of your sources of comfort.  No one should take away a item that is of comfort to them.  If its a pacifier then just lay some rules down for it when your child gets older, don't replace it either, not unless you can't use it, otherwise just keep cleaning it and put it in storage or whatever.  Moving on, I'm 20 years old, and I suck on my pacifiers during random times, which is only on occasion.  My teeth are well aligned.  Truth be told, parents are paranoid that their child will get really bad teeth, but the thing is, everyone is different so its just like anything else, its like saying "omg, stop breathing in smoke from that cigar, you'll get cancer" yet people get cancer even without being around smoke.  Everyone's body is different, no matter how you put it, the only way to go is to be the best judger of yourself.  Also, let me lay this down, I've done plenty of research for both "theories" because that's what they are.  I was 7 years old before I gave up my pacifier and put it in storage.  Again, a 6 or 7 year old kid isn't going to take their paci' to school, they know distinctively that it would be embarrassing, so they leave it home.  I've finished my rant.  I'm sure everyone gets my point now.  I hope this helped you out and other people too!  ^ ^    

Akira Claymore ~

[coolman22]

hi i am dead against giving any 1 a pacifier but i have seen kids upto aged 10 having them. i even seen 1 girl come in shoping with her parents and brother with a pacifier and a nappy on and she would of been about 9.

[margypops]

May I venture to ask why thses really old controversial threads are being dragged up ?

[margypops]

Hi guys .. I agree that it is up to you if you want to have a pacifier, some have blankies, teddies..I think it is a way of soothing yourself and as you get older you will find other ways and be more self confident.,it will pass so dont be concerned what others say .

[Livvy101]

Hi. I'm 12 and I still suck a dummy. Its a comfort thing, my friends have accepted it and my boyfriend who I've been with for about 3 months recently found out cuz he caught me in school,, all my friends have accepted it so I think it's fine. I can walk around with it in my mouth no one really says anything people just get over it no big deal at least I'm not out on the streets smoking and drinking so it's ok, I love the fact that everyones so used to it no one cares I have quite a big school and I'm in year 7 going up to year 8 and my school goes up to year 11 then six form but no one takes any notice even the older kids :) a couple if girls in year 9 going to year 10 have them and they walk around school with them I get angry quite alot so it calms me down I also have a bottle so nights if I can't sleep or I'm sad :) it's a comfort thing, not sure if this helps but your daughter isn't the only one!!!! Hope this makes you feel better about it good luck!!!  

[margypops]

well Livvy you may have created a new cult thing, its up to you but I doubt it looks prettier on a gal that a nice smile and some nice looking lips .

[hormigabrava23]

well, in my opinion it is just as abnormal as biting your fingernails or shaking your legs when you are sitting at the dinner table. it is more about what gives comfort to the child. yes he probably should have dropped the pacifier about 10 years ago, but probably now that he is soon to become a teenager he will be more concerned about what his friend might say or think and drop it.

i think as parents we try to avoid making the mistakes our parents made, but we make our own mistakes. some parents give their child a pacifier to calm them down, some read them a book, and some cant think of a better way to calm their kids down than with some benadryl.

[jamiegardner]

i still have a dummy and im 7teen

[margypops]

I guess guys its what ever frosts your cookies .

[Atra42o]

I am so glad to see thus issue in other children. My daughter will be 9 in 8 weeks and still uses a "sissy", everyone gives me different advice, but the dr tells me she will give it up when she's ready. My son used his until he was 5, but then sucked his thumb until he was 10. I feel if children in their teens can still suck their thumbs and be socially accepted, what harm is it causing to let her have a pacifier at night. She only uses it here and when she's tired in the car. Does anyone have any advice?

[dottybangles]

My sons both still suck dummies age 5 and 9 - I have struggled with it over the years but then I still suck my thumb and I am 34!  So far it has not caused any problem with their teeth and they are both very happy, sociable boys who happily sleep over at other people's houses without dummies when required.  I don't think it is right to take something away from a child that brings them security just because of our inbuilt preconceived ideas of what is socially acceptable and what is not.  I have made a rule that dummies do not leave the house otherwise I think they would walk around with them all day! The only real problem I have is that when they have a dummy in, their brains seem to disengage so I have limited sucking to bedtime and resting times, otherwise it would be like living with two zombies!  Don't quite understand why some kids want to suck and some do not, but then we all are very different from each other in so many ways and this is just another one.  I would not be able to stop sucking my thumb even if I wanted to, it is a great way of relaxing and has never caused me any problems at all.  Surely it is better than using alcohol or drugs to unwind?! I am a naturally calm person who rarely gets wound  up, maybe thumb sucking is the answer...and what is the difference between thumb sucking and dummy sucking? Absolutely nothing, we just seem to think one is cute and the other is socially unacceptable after the age of about one and a half, trouble is people usually don't bother to question these preconditioned ideas which is a shame

[Eily65]

Help!  My lovely kind happy seven year old suck a dummy still, but I have just come back from the dentist who has told us that if she doesn't stop, she will need orthodontal treatment.  Basically her bite is not developing properly.

I feel so bad for her.  She really only uses it when she's tired at home and in bed - but i'ts obviously affected her teeth. She tried to be really brave about it, but she, poor child is really upset and I don't know the best way to go about it all.  I sucked a dummy when I was her age, but it didn't affect my teeth, so I just gave it up naturally..

What can I do?

[mikeaa]

Are you people insane. If your 11 6year old has a pacifier your a horrible parent. What ever happened to just saying "no". I have two kids. My oldest never had one and the youngest lasted about six months. She cried a few days but it passed. This generation has become a bunch of brats that have never been told no. That does an injustice to the child.

[Djsmile]

If your child ***** on their thumb or pacifier it is very commen my niece still does and if you want to stop them.try curing off the tip of the pacifier off every time a child goes to school

[margypops]

hahah I like that idea ..it sounds like it may work...Moms take note..snip em '

[Voiceinthewilderness]

You realize Most Kids are recommended for orthodontist Treatment regardless of pacifier use... Ortho Treatment is Certainly Wörth it - don't get wrong- but in out House of 4 Kids- 2 had prolonged paci use - and 2 did Not-- Same genes-- all recommended forortho...and now that i have Kid w prolonged paci use, i was concerned about it As well... Until a Doc friend of Mine told me that there is Some Research that actually is positive for paci use--- apparently it spreads the Palette, Making Room for more teeth, and Avoiding crowding... Made Sense to me.... And for you who do Not Know, there is a pressure Point behind the Front teeth, where a paci touches, or your Thumb in Some cases, which releases those "feel good" endorphins.... Better than Drugs to calm Kids--- and Way better than alcohol Or Some Other Things in which Even Young Kids indulge these days to bring them comfort.... I agree, perhaps something is bothering the Kid, (School, Friends, homelife) but Figure that out with the Kid and then try together to Solve the paci issue..... It is still better than them Ripping out their hair or eyebrows from Stress... IMO...which together w a Couple of bucks, will still buh you a Cup of starbucks Coffee!!!!!!   Hahaha!!! Good luck!

[Voiceinthewilderness]

I hatte German auto correct!!!!!!  Yes, i do Command the english language- just Not my German spellcheck....sorry....hate it....

[margypops]

Good post Voice  makes total sense to me ..some info there I didnt know , must be better than taking all the drugs that get dished out to weird sounding 'disorders'.

[yojojo12]

being an adult baby i still use a pacifier at age 24. but there are two suprising diffrences about the situation relating to me and my experiance with pacifiers.
The first is my mum still uses one at night, and she is 60 +
The second is i never gave my dummy up i use is all the time were ever i am, and yes that includes in public. For me its very much a comfort to be able to suck on something, but much more a security and a need. I have to have something in my mouth or i just break down emotionaly. Its a pathalogical thing.

[SierraMistress]

In my opinion.. honestly.. I think its normal. I have a pacifier myself, but if my siblings or parents ever told my friends I would be so embarrassed! (I'm ten but yeah who cares.) I don't bring it to anywhere public and somehow I can only control not having a pacifier in public. (school, church, etc..) Yet when I'm home or having to go somewhere (a long drive) I must bring it. No matter how hard I try, I cannot help it.  I am so tempted to take it. When I arrive from school to home I take my pacifier and have to suck on it. When I have it, I have to use it. When I know I have it I have to use it or else I will sweat a lot and work up tears.

I always have to use it to go to sleep. I need something in my mouth, and I enjoy using my pacifier. I am so addicted that when my mom tries to stop me I have to sneak it. My mouth feels dry without my pacifier, and when I go to a sleepover I most likely will go home early but sometimes I make it but only because I start biting my cheeks in the inside. (if you know what I mean.)

My teeth aren't ruined (they are perfectly fine) so I wouldn't be worried. We can't help it. Don't just tell them to stop. It's their choice. We cannot help it, honestly.

[girlwhohatesgrowingup]

Sorry to break this to all but it could be developing a fetish as an ABDL or just those who hate growing up like me. In the eyes of Society, I'm an immature 21 year old women but in the heart of my own I am a lost 12 year old girl. (Like losing your inner child long story) However, while alone...I use a pacifier to help me sleep and also enjoy drinking warm milk, hot chocolate or green tea from a baby bottle. I say if people aint hurting anyone, it aint a serious crime like a murder if one refuses to grow up. In the end,it's their life not yours. I had a whole family who never accepted me as I am. I felt depressed but never went on Anti Depressants. I stopped feeling depressed the day I walked away from them all. So if you know someone who does this or any other of what you consider "immature" behaviour. Try thinking of all the worse crimes out there such as murder, rape, animal cruelty, drugs and so on? See, being happy and immature aint so bad! Learn to deal with who people are and accept it. If you don't, in years to come they may walk away and never talk to you again so just let people be!