13 year old boy using 17 year old stepsisters unclean panties to masterbate

[lilmamad37]

One day I was washing all the family bedding. As I was taking apart the pillow case from the pillow of my 13 year old, adhd son, I felt something odd. I reached in and pulled out a pair of my 17 year old stepdaughters in unclean panties. I confronted him, he admitted it and agreed to stop. About a week went by, as the kids were in school, I was straightening up their bathroom, as I walked by the hallway closet, I saw something out of the corner of my eye that just didn't seem right. I looked over, and in a of shoe is another pair of unclean panties. We discussed it yet again. I told him this behavior is unacceptable, and he said he understood and agreed to stop. As time went on, I found more crumpled up panties in his dresser. I've talked to my husband. He didn't really say anything at first. But now he's not having it. I've since took my son to therapy for an initial visit. Waiting to go back.
         My son is a good boy whom is very sensitive and will get his feelings hurt if you look at him wrong or he'll cry as he's getting yelled at. As we came back from a very fun & exciting week vacation, I caught my son coming out of my other 19  year old stepdaughters room carrying nothing. I told him to put back whatever he had gotten, he said he didn't have anything. We argued quietly for a few minutes. He finally went back into her room unnoticed. I trusted he would do the right thing. A couple days later, I was in the kids bathroom putting toiletries away, and saw something out of the ordinary. In the cabinet over the toilet, (which is pretty high, and hangs on the wall) top shelf, there's f I v e pairs of unclean panties. Oh My Gosh.............
............this IS THE LAST STRAW! I told him that if he had any garments as of lately, get them, bring them to me in a triple tied bagged, and I would take care of them. And if he was to EVER do it again, I would be telling his STEPFATHER. He doesn't like it when he's yelled at, let alone when he gets in trouble. I've tried grounding, taking his phone, iPod, Xbox live, home computer games, D's etc.....I don't know what else to do, unless this is normal behavior for a 13 year old adhd boy going thru puberty. Any Insight?

[NorthHavenGuy]

I would not be too concerned, when I was about the same age my father remarried and suddenly I had 2 stepsisters, one my age and the other a year younger, I often went through the hamper and masturbated with their underwear, and also my stepmoms, I would sometimes try to peek at them naked as well and slightly pried the moldings around the doors so I could view them in the bathroom, there were times I would sneak into their room at night and pull their covers down and nighty up so I could see them naked that way as well. I let them see me naked many times too, I would go to bed early and pretend to be asleep and let my penis fall out of my shorts, once they noticed they would look and even giggle , this of course got me more excited and I would get an erection, sometimes ejaculating as I pretended to sleep without even touching myself , Then we grew up, our parents eventually separated and no problems came from our fun times as kids

[nathanael1]

i know it sounds wierd but if he cant have the underpants mabey get him a pair of his own to do what he wants with

[maltapaceberry]

I dont know if its normal or not but i think at 13 he start to feel things and wants stuff and now a days even in movies and internet children takes ideas very quickly and maybe his friends are doing the same0you have to dig deeper by speaking to him no punishing him tell him that you wont be angry at him that you want to understand him but in a way i think its better if he talks to his stepdad ,man to man becouse its like asking about pirod to father so he may be more open to  him , but i agree to tell your girls to be carefull since they are biger and to give the undes direct to you , i think you son can use other stuf other than the pentys witch are dirty and not good  , i think you need to tell thatip most importnt to be carefull doing sex becouse for now he .is using penties but later he will do the next step , good luck ber

[jemma116]

I agree with MarkLakewood3367 that you should not leave your son alone with any of the girls.

Smelling someone's underpants at the age o 13 is abnormal.  

Masturbating is fine, but not when he is using his stepsister's underpants or any one else's for that matter.

Get the girls to put the dirty clothes into the laundry basket and not to leave them lying about (which some girls do).  Of course this won't stop your son from retrieving them from the laundry basket, so it is a case of keeping an eye on what he does and checking his bedroom.  Perhaps you should also explain to him about the health hazards of dirty underwear, but no doubt if he has this "fetish", I do not think explaining about hygiene will put him off.

Perhaps getting the dirty underwear washed sooner so that it is not left for him to "sneak" it into his bedroom may be a good idea.  Perhaps you need to check his bedroom more frequently too.

Best of luck.

[helper27]

I think it is normal as long as it dosn't get serious like masterbating with them everyday  and since he has an older sister I think that is totaly normal
I've been masterbating since I was 11 and I didn't think of it in a sexual way untill I was older but if it is serious than I would get him theropy

[MarkLakewood3367]

Being sexually attracted to someone whom you are not related isn't abnormal which can make blended families difficult.  But by your description, your son appears to be overly sexually obsessed with your stepdaughters which is abnormal, concerning, and possibly dangerous.

I would say that you are doing the right thing.  Getting him involved with mental health counseling needs to occur ASAP.  Also, continue to discipline him for this behavior.  Finally, make sure that he is never left alone with your stepdaughter's to prevent him from acting out his sexual impulses on them which very well could be the next step.

[RockRose]

I don't know how long your son has been exposed to these older teenage girls who he isn't related to,  but I don't think this is completely abnormal behavior.

This happens in blended families - teenage sex hormones run very high,  and these are girls who are of no relation to him who he is living with.

I'm not sure therapy is in order,  but rather,  a laundry system that doesn't allow him access to their clothing might be a good idea.