Hi, I need help regarding the way my 2 and half year old daughter started sexualized talk recently. She keeps talking about kissing or licking a penis and comes up with incoherent imaginary situations involving this activity. A week ago she said to my wife, among other things, that she has to "go downstairs and lick daddy's penis". This happened about 3 times in last month or 2, and she never talked like this before.
We are very worried and concerned. She has a 4 and half year old brother and they are not overly curious with each other, never seen them even touch each others parts, they have bath together but apart from knowing who has got what and making fun about it they are not interested in exploring. We use term "penis" and "vagina" freely and try to be open about what the private parts are, as my wife is a social worker and says its good that the children can talk about their parts clearly. We kiss each other in front of children, hug and show affection, but they never seen us having sex and/or heard us talking about it. We certainly dont talk about sexual practices in front of them.
The girl has been at home with me, in our sight 24/7, doesnt even go to nursery yet. We are both upset that she may have been abused but we cant protect her more from exposure, only time either one of us hasnt been with her since birth we can think of is when we were visiting my sister 6 months ago, and she was out of our sight with her brother and 10 and 12 year old cousins for a few minutes here and there playing. We never used child care in any form or babysitters. How can she been experimenting with her thoughts like that, we are at loss and very upset, we love our children and cant imagine them being harmed. . Thanks for reading, sorry for length.
It's not at all clear how it might have occurred to her to make the comments she did. Have you asked her about it? That is, have you asked her how she happended to have the idea to lick or to kiss a penis? At the very least, be sure to set a firm limit on such talk and behavior.
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