3 Yr Old Grandson with sudden emotional problems

[clong1]

My grandson will be 3 years old in March.  He is more aggresive than most 2 yr olds. He and his mother lived with us for his first 21/2 years. They moved out about 8 months ago with my daughters boyfriend (who he does not like)and ever since then his behavior has gotten worse. I know there was an adjustment for him and he seemed to adjust ok.  But just recently things have gotten bad.  He crys uncontrollably when he can not do what he wants to do.  He is very clingy to his mom. He will cry if you do not stay with him, while he plays (he will sit and color for an hour if we let him). He asks where is mom is all the time. He seems to be sick to much, from throwing up to colds.  He has nightmares, and he only sleeps about 9 hrs a day (Naps only 30 mins). His pottie training seemed to be going good and now not so good.
Things that have happened to him that could be causing some these problems - 1. Her boyfriend beat him to hard and put marks on his butt one time (He still talks about that). 2. He was going to the babysitters daily and I would babysit at night (he did not get to see his mom as much) while my daughter was going to school. 3. He has not gone to the babysitters for 3 weeks and grandma has not babysat either, he has been with mom 24/7.  4. They have stopped spanky him completely (Thank God). 5. My daughter is being treated for major depression. 6. He has no signs of physical abuse.
Is there a possiblity my grandson has emotional problems or could it be something else?  If so what could it be?  What should I do?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Not necessarily. It can be difficult to diagnose ADHD in a child so young. By nature three-year-olds tend to be very active and impulsive and display limited attention. However, some children are extreme in the degree to which they display these characteristics and, in the presence of a positive family history, ADHD is sometimes diagnosed in very young children. Even when it is diagnosed, prescribing medication for such a young child does not occur very often. Again, though, in extreme instances it is done. The child's mother should not give medication on her own - this is a bad idea and is an example of poor judgement on her part. Medication should be prescribed by a doctor and administered only according to the prescriber's instructions.

[clong1]

I just found out that a Dr. told my daughter that my grandson has ADHD.  My daughter does not always tell the truth, so I am a little surprized that a 3 yr old is diagnosed with ADHD. She gave him some of her adderal, which scars me to death.  Would'nt it be unusal for a Dr. to give a 3 yr old medication for ADHD.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

I prefer not to offer guidance yet in the absence of the evaluation. The approach to the behavior will in part depend on the overall picture, particularly the nature of her relationship with her son.

[clong1]

Thank you, she has been trying to get a hold of a child psychologist that was recommended by the neurologest.  What can she do in the mean time with his excessive crying and clinging to her.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

There are definitely signs that your grandson is displaying emotional problems. It would help if you can persuade hos mother to consult with a child psychologist or other child mental health professional. This clinician can evaluate your grandson and, probably more importantly, offer guidance to his mother about how to proceed.