3 year old daughter is uncontrollable

my 3 year old daugfhter has become a handful. she doesn't listen to what her father or myself say, she fights, swears, and carries on about everything it's like i have a teenager in my 3yr olds body. my 2 boys are well behaved and are perfect angels compared to her. i don't compare my kids, i have tried time out, 123 magic, everything i can possibly think of. i'm starting to go insane and begining to find it hard to cope.  Please help i'm at my wits end

[jillkristin]

OMG!  Am I ever happy to talk to you....I am having the exact same problem and I don't know what to do either.  I only have one daughter so I have no-one  to compare her to but the other day she looked right at me and said, "Mommy, you are an a&^hole."  Nice, I know.  She is very hard headed, wants it her way or nothing else and bossy.  She will think nothing of hitting me.  My sister jokes that she is going to be a dictator one day.  Interestingly enough she seems to listen to her dad however he won't put up with her outrageousness.  I try to discipline her but end up feeling like I've done nothing but yell at her all day long and then I go to bed feeling bad.  We have spanked her and tried the time out thing but I guess we are not consistent because no one wants to hear yer yelling all day and night!  Let me know if you find something that works, PLEASE!