3year old boy

My 3 year old boy masturbating on bed while he on end of the sleep. I found that when his bladder is full and his penny arouses and he like to masturbate by pressing on bed very rigorously. If we call and try to distract he had blown out of proportion in anger. How to stop this behavior?

[supermomma531]

Try timeouts for his anger issues. Talk to him about this behavior of masturbating and tell him of how inappropriate it is in your house but also let him know if you approve of this, that masturbating needs to be done in privacy. But you need to make a decision as to how you feel about the situation. If you feel uncomfortable, then tell him that his behavior is unacceptable. Children do explore their bodies at a young age and it is normal for this behavior. You're just gonna have to keep speaking with him and tell him not to do it but you're gonna have a hard time stopping it. 1 minute per year for timeouts with talking to him to make him understand. Good luck

[triggles45]

Sorry but ,I disagree with the fact that masturbating is inappropriate.



I totally disagree with you telling anyone that masturbating is inappropriate. It's a natural thing that all age groups experience. Sorry.

[margypops]

It really depends on the excessiveness of the behavior especially in a very young child, I would definatly be aware of anything going on if this small child is doing this a lot, I do not see that as Normal I see it as a learned behavior. A lot of Parents do not have their eyes wide open to the behaviors around them and there is a lot of denial.This is my opinion as we all have differing ones.

[supermomma531]

I re-read my post to see if I had said anything wrong but in my post, I said that if the parents agree with the child's behavior, what they can do about it and if they disagree with the child's behavior, then what to do about it. I never said that the behavior is right or wrong. I'm not like that. I wouldn't tell somebody how to raise their children. I don't have time for that kind of non-sense.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and everyone raises their children the best way they know how. When people come to a subject that they're not sure what to do about, then they research it or ask for advice. This is what I'm here for. Advice if I have any to give. I thought that I would write to you and say thank you for your concerns. I'm always open to suggestions by all means though. I am more than willing to hear advice from anyone who has more experience than I do in the child raising department.
I am sorry if I offended you in any way. No harm was ever intended.

[Billionk]

3!?

He probably doesn't even know what it is at 3!

Tell him not to do it and discaplin him.

Im 13 and im pretty sure I had no clue what masturbating was when I was 3!? I only found out at 11. It's a natural thing.. only when you're 18+ but he's still got a life and he should be playing with toys, not mastrubating in his bed.

Sorry but how did he learn this? Experimenting or seeing somebody else do it....

~Billionk (Dan)

[Victoria01]

This is very normal, HOWEVER, anything done in excess should warrant a talk with his pediatrician. It is normal for a toddler to explore his own body and do what feels good to him. As his parent you need to decide if this is acceptable behavior in your home, but please do not punish him for it. You need to sit down and speak to him about appropriate and inappropriate behavior.

His anger is a different issue altogether. He need to be taught different ways to control his emotions but still be able to feel any emotion he wants. We all get angry, but we learn how to deal with it in certain ways that are appropriate.

[creditman310564]

A three year old is not masturbating in the adult sense, i.e. to achieve orgasm. Whether it be a girl rubbing her vulva against the cot bars, or in your case a boy holding his penis, does not mean they are sex maniacs !

In the case of the girl it could be that she has an irritation such as thrush which needs to be treated, or just plain: "it feels nice".

From what you describe of the boy's behaviour sounds as though it it more a need to go the toilet urgently and is quite literally " holding on" to stop him self from wetting.  The fact that you state that his penis is erect, tends to confirm that view.

A boy does not usually experience sexual arousal to create an erection until he is about ten years old, and often may rub the penis, but not to the point of orgasm, later he may discover that if he does it frequently then he will orgasm and ejaculate: genuine masturbation.  

There is nothing wrong with either your daughter or son, but just remind them that it something they do in private and when they are on their own. This attitude will stop any embarrassing moments in public and allow them to discover their bodies in a natural and gradual manner.  Making it taboo is likely to end up with a seriously confused child, who may find forming a relationship with the opposite sex more difficult when they reach puberty and beyond.

Don't make them feel guilty about it but just remind them it is something they do in private, e.g their bedroom. Never minde the "tell tale signs" a Washing Machine will soon remove those from the bed clothes :-)

[Tb49663]

Ever stop to think that he's doing it because it feels good?  

I'm a single dad of a 9 year old and the conversation went something like this:

"dude-you gotta do that when you're alone."

Self-conscious kid stops playing with it and goes about his business.

No drama, no shame, just matter of fact. Kids will gauge their emotional response based on YOUR reaction. If you freak out and lose your cool, they're going to freak out and develop a complex about exploring their sexuality.

It's a penis and it feels good when you touch it.

[s4545]

I have a similar problem with my 3 year old son. He ***** his fingure and touches his **** at the same time. He will not touch any other area, at the moment he pulls his foreskin and rubbing his penis on any available material or surface making movements as if having sex. A night he sleeps on his stomach and makes sex like movements. He worries me very much, in public  he removes his penis and rubs it on anyone around. Seems like he has an irritation although all medication has failed. I am considering circumcision but he has hemophilia. Attempts to talk to him to stop have failed, I am desperate please advise my mail is; was.***@****. Thanks.

[takemaru]

"in public  he removes his penis and rubs it on anyone around"
I think you made a typo or something :D
He is only 3, I think you shouldn't worry about much at home, but teach him to show self-restraint when in public. I think he will stop soon, if not, tell him to do it in only in private, when he becomes a little older.

"Seems like he has an irritation although all medication failed"
Of course he has an irritation, it feels good, and he wants to do it more. You shouldn't be worried, if it is that kind of itch.

"circumcision"
By all means, NO! He isn't that small, he will remeber it, I'm sure it will cause emotional scars. It is like you mutilated him, because he masturbated.