4 year old anger problem

I have a 4 year old that I think has a anger problem.. The Doctor told me that he needed anger management when he was 3 years old because he hit my nephew with a hammer. But I just thought no...... he is a boy that is what boys do. Well he is 4 now and it is worse, if he dont get his way he acts out. The other day we were in the post office and he wanted a sucker and the lady said he could have one and he throgh the hole basket at her, if I spank him he will hit me. He has a 6 year old sister that he whips on. I am so scared that I am not going to get controll of this and he is going to hurt me.. My husband said the problem is me because I dont get on to him. I scared he will hate me. Please help me should he be in anger management???

[RockRose]

Good heavens.  No he should not be in anger management.  Your husband is  a wimp and so are you.   Actually,  your husband is a much bigger wimp than you are.  

For God's sake, take control of this child and stop allowing him to hurt other kids!  This is a small child,  take control.  

[adm2ctm]

I did not post this for you people to call us names or make fun of us. I really think this is a problem many other children have NOT just mine. My husband and I are not wimps we are going through alot right now, we also have a 6 year old daughter that just started having seizures and the doctor cannot figure out where. That is why he is getting away with alot more than normal...

[treazzure007]

If you and your husband continue to lag around and point fingers instead of dealing with this, youll help the problem take a firm root and really bloom like crazy from there.  This will only get worse.  That child needs DISCIPLINE.  You have the internet and other resources available on all sorts of disciplining methods.  I suggest you get started looking and working it out.  Teaching, protecting, DISCIPLINING, and loving your children is part of your job as parents.  

[Ajsmommybdd]

You are not a bad parent...I too have a four year old who is actually suffering from something called Behavior Disturbance Disorder who acts the same way and have tried every form of Discipline reccomended. My child is in therapy for his behavior and we hope to see results. Sometimes your child can't be controled. Some people do not understand that because the do not experience it.