4 year old is obsessed with cords

My 4 year old son has always been interested in cords. It started very early (1 1/2 yrs)  and it was cute - he'd play with an extra computer mouse, drag it around like it was a pet. Then started "plugging" things in to the couch cushions. We thought it was very creative of him and nurtured his interest in how things worked. Somewhere along the line it got out of hand. My husband and I seem to be in eternal renovation, so extension cords were always around. He'd ask to play with them and we'd let him take a couple and attach them together. He'd concentrate and imagine that he was doing something very important. Because we were extra worried we always reinforced that outlets and anything already plugged in were off limits. Although we've always kept an eye on him. We've struggled with this issue because he enjoys playing with a few cords so much that he would keep himself busy and use his imagination. We always new it was weird and not considered a good idea. But anyone who saw him do the stuff he did with a few cord would always comment on how amazing he was about putting them together and being so imaginative. We've taken them way on a few occasions, but they've always crept back. I know this seems hard to imagine - but he would have a box of extension cords, small fans or radios with cords, outlet strips and he would connect them in a thousand different ways and string them all over the living room and never go near a real outlet or put anything around his neck. Recently it's gotten out of hand. My mother bought him 6 cords that he was allowed to have, but he wasn't allowed to ask for any more. Well that didn't work - he weaseled quite a few more out of his grandfather (who are torn as well - is this cute or horrible?) I thought it was a good idea at first and did it at home too. The problem is he works you for more and more and more. What he has is never good enough. He turns into this other person - overly obsessed. He started to not want to go to preschool b/c he wanted to play cords. He was having nightmares about being sucked into a fan and pulled through the electric lines. He had the biggest tantrum on the front lawn when we made him come in from re-arranging our christmas decoration (all with cords). We put them away after that. Cold turkey (except my parents haven't done the same thing) and he's managing - but he brings them up all the time and substitutes other things for them - like ropes and hoses. He talks to other kids about them and they think he's crazy, so he's not relating well to kids his age. He brings cords up in conversation - says stuff like "wouldn't this be cool if it was plugged in?". He finds them everywhere (grocery store, musuem, malls...) and tries to figure out how they are plugged in. It's gotten crazy. and I just wish he were like other little boys. He whines all the time, is super emotional, very picky eater, very attached to me, and my sitter says he's anxious, a friend says he parallel plays at preschool.
I've scheduled an appt. with a child psychologist - but it's not till the end of July. I just don't know what to do till then. I"ve been trying to get him interested in other things, but cords always come up. I'm at the point where I want him to be normal so badly I get aggravated when he doesn't want to do normal kid stuff. I've looked up OCD, ADHD, Aspergers, Anxiety, Depression (which I have and runs in the family). Nothing seems to fit. Any thoughts? If this were a train obsession, it would be acceptable, but it's not and I want to do right by him. Please help...

[RockRose]

What is your problem?  Your son is a budding genious engineer,  and you're all about limiting and punishing.

What's going on here?   My husband knew from the age of four that he wanted to be an electrical engineer,  the architectural engineer  that designed our house was running hoses with water all over his backyard,  and hooking them up to hills and up trees - at the age of five - and our house is built on a cliff and his expertise was needed.

For crying out loud,  give him his cords.  In my book,  he IS like other boys - other boys who are called from preschool to be brilliant (and very successful, by the way) engineers.

Give that boy his cords and stop whining!

[myboyscrazymom]

Did he really? I've been searching and searching for any information about this but found none. I've always felt like he's either a genius or crazy. But it's really very reassuring to hear someone else's experience.

thank you for your comment.

[Amy521]

I was fixated on spatulas when I was little, apparently.  I started calling them this weird pet name I made up and from ages 2 to 4 played with them like dolls.  I'm in culinary school now...haha.  I was always kind of a strange kid and a little weird, but I feel like if my parents tried to suppress that I'd be all boring and have no personality.  Now I'm pretty eclectic, smart, and creative.  I turned out fine.  Don't freak him out by taking him to a shrink, that'll make him feel like you think he's a freak.

[myboyscrazymom]

I guess my biggest fear is that he's obsessed to a degree that is unhealthy. He literally turns into a different child when he gets his hands on cords. it's starts innocently but then he can't get enough, nothing is good enough, he won't do anything else. I'm worried that it's effecting his ability to socialize with kids his age.
I don't want to kill his creativity, or imaginative thinking which is why my husband and I have really struggled with this - we are both artists (I'm in design and he's a craft artist), so to shut that down would truly be a sin. But I want him to be able to socialize too.

[Agiesmom]

I'm wondering...why have you ruled out the possibility of Asperger's Syndrome?

[ames67]

Well there seems to be extremes on either end of the discussion. I think it is a good idea to take him to see someone. I am in the mental health field and I thought Asperger's as well, especially if he is having difficulty relating to other kids (Asperger Syndrome by Tony Atwood is a great little book on the disorder). But without a thorough evaluation its hard to say. In the meantime, try scheduling the time he is allowed to play with cords, same time each day, or maybe just on the weekends and have it also be a reward for good behavior. Work it to your advantage while still allowing him to be creative, but you need to get the grandparents on board as well. Hope this helps.

[HZMom]

Oh my gosh! You just described MY 4 ...soon to be 5 year old son!!
My husband and I feel the same way as you do.  I am more 'concerned' than my husband but, my son usually wants to plug them in. Finally we have him asking us to plug THEM in as he knows we will take them away if he plugs one in.
My son would play with cords, ropes, hoses and anything he can tie up and string together all the time if we allowed it. He has done this since he was 18 months old. I thought he would outgrow it but, not so. I, too, want to encourage more social play. He will socialize but, often wants his friends to do the same with cords, etc...and they are not interested.
It frustrates me. He is  a very bright, articulate  and very strong willed child. He constantly tries to negotiate everything and come up with a "better idea".  He's a loving child and challenging at the same time. He has issues with social space and often interferes or 'bothers' others as they play. He has difficulty playing by himself and involves himself in whatever another child is playing with even if he really is not interested in what they are doing. He has a need to invade others space and often receives negative feedback. It's heart breaking at times.   He is an extremely busy and active child. He will keep you on your toes at ALL times.
I just wanted to let you know we have the same concerns with cords...thught you may want to know.
Good Luck and I hope to hear more if you end up seeing a specialist.
Concerned Mom of 2  

[momco]

Wow.  My son too!  to the T.  (and HZ Mom).  My son's teacher in his ECFE class just expressed concerns about him displaying 'autistic' symptoms, (empashisizing high-functioning/ aspergers).  We proceeded with the recommended assessment.  2 of the 3 tests were positive by negligible scores.  The team of professionals admitted he likely wouldn't be clinically diagnosed.  I love my son's creativity and passion for how things work.  The questions and obsession with cords can be overwhelming at times.  How is your son?  Please offer any progress or insights you are willing to share.  Thank you and take care.  Momco

[maky158]

While reading this, I thought Aspergers as well. Then reading the other posts, I thought maybe just a simple obsession. Anyway, if it's that bad, get him tested. Not a big deal. I agree with ames67. how about setting aside special times each day for him to play cords? That way he learns to balance. It will tough at first and maybe a struggle, but if you stick to this new schedule, eventually it should work out. Have you tried introducing him to other things that maybe he can find interesting? Then you can shuffle things around with him. A little time doing this, a little time doing that. He needs you to teach him balnace. That way he doesn't become obsessive in general about stuff.

[kc90204]

i can't believe that i have found other parents experiencing the same issues-- that i have been concerned about!!!  i have a 2 year old that is completely infactuated with plugging cords in and out of the outlets!! we have tried every cover and safety that we know of and he still finds a way to get through the safteys!!! he does not play with toys only electrical cords -- and his new obsession is taking batteries out of the remote control and keeps putting them back in--out and in !!! im trying to figure out if he is just interested because he's trying to "figure things out"--or if this obsession is something that i should be looking more into. he does say many words-- but he definetly babbles alot more than he speaks clearly--the problem is also that if i try to keep him away from the cords or the batteries and try to direct his attention towards something else then he throws  extreme crying fits-- hes devastated-- and not just for a minute. i really hope that someone can also give me a clue as to if this seems like normal behavior for a two year old boy or not. he has been doing this type of behavioral thing with all out tantrums since he's been 1yr.

[cmon_now_people]

Where are the dad's in all this?   Every kid I know growing up was obsessed with something weird.  That's what they do.  Also, don't be so afraid of the crying fits because guess what- they need to learn how to deal with life and process those feelings so when they get older and the boss says "no, you can't do that - just do your own job" they can deal.  Also, a well known child development expert once told me that kids that age don't even know WHY they are doing what they are doing and can't explain it in grown up terms, so when they are asked it stresses them out even more and they become anxious.  The best is to limit it/schedule it like someone mentioned, and then do not make a big deal out of it or even talk about it any more than you would regular topics.  
It's not a syndrome- it's just part of growing up and small minds forming and understanding the world ( and how their parents react to them!) Come on now people!

[Jessica2375]

I wouldn't try and tell Einstein to paint a Picasso

" i yam what i yam" [Popeye]

[jennybinindy]

My 4 year old son was recently diagnosed with ASD.. high functioning. And he is obsessed with cords as well. And anything that uses a cord. He has meltdowns sometimes when we take them away. It's crazy.

[pinkyrural769]

we have the exact same problem as you with our 4 year old son.He was diagnosed with autisim a year ago at the same time that he started this obsession  He steals cords,extension cords etc.. anything related to electrical cords. He has tantrums when we take them from him ,he will even lie to get access to a room where they are kept. Its driving us literally crazy we have smoke coming out of one plug because he tore a Christmas light out of the wall socket . We have unusable DVD players,radios.lamps,computer cords,alarms clock. pretty much everything he touches because the plugs are bent ,damaged so we totally sympathize with u . He manages to find confiscated plugs so the whole safety issue has gone out the window and we feel that its an endless situation, we are sure that he's been electrocuted at least once  and our social worker seems to be helpless in this situation .

[shiloh4]

My son is 3 1/2 and has been obsessed with cords for the last 2 years. He is only ok without them when he finds a similar obsession. puzzles, duplo, geomag, train tracks, zoobs, dog leashes etc. Anything he gets hooked on connects. Its all about connecting. He will play with these things for hours a day for months then hes over them and goes back to the cords. I have put all the extra cords away in a bag and he constantly asks for them. He doesnt know what to do if he cant have them. And everywhere we go, hes seeing the cords for things and thats all he wants to talk about. We go to a pet store and he spends the whole time staring at all the cords for the fish tanks. He has major meltdowns if anyone touches what hes connected. It has to be just the way he says and he plays all kinds of imaginary games with them. the cords can become anything for him. we dont have a wii but he pretends to play one with the cords and a portable dvd player that doesnt work, he plays posty man games, catches dragons, pretends its a cd player and asks me to request songs. So i'm also wondering if this is healthy or gone too far. If i let him loose with the cords, they are connected from one end of the house to the other! I'd love to hear from anyone who has either moved past the obsession or had something positive come from it.

[specialmom]

I think your child has a vivid imagination and that is actually a sign of great intelligence.  He probably had fun with his 'game' the first couple of times with the cords and now when he sees one, he thinks back to that game and wants to play/have fun again.  I honestly would not worry unless it is something he could get wrapped up in and choke himself.  But he sounds deightful, full of interesting ideas.  Celebrate that!