5 YEAR OLD WITH SEXUAL ISSUES

[ELLE34]

MY SON IS 5 YEARS OLD. WHEN HE WAS YOUNGER HE USED TO TAKE HIS STUFFED BEARS AND HUMP THEM IF YOU WILL  OR PLACE THEM DOWN BY HIS PENIS AND HE WOULD BE ERECT. HE WOULD BE EMBARASSED IF YOU CAUGHT HIM DOING THIS. I HID ALL THE BEARS.HE WOULD LAY IN THE TUB AND HOLD /STROKE HIS PENIS AND WOULD BE ERECT. I TOLD HIM THAT WAS NOT APPROPRIATE  EXCEPT BY HIMSELF IN HIS OWN ROOM. I EXPLAINED OUR PRIVATES WERE PRIVATE FOR ONLY ONESELF UNLESS YOU ARE MARRIED LIKE MOMMY AND DADDY. WHEN HE TURNED \5 HE WAS CAUGHT IN HIS SPIDERMAN TENT WITH HIS 3 YEAR OLD GIRL COUSIN AND TOLD HER TO TOUCH HIS PENIS. HE WAS CAUGHT BY HIS AUNT WHO TALKED TO HIM AND HER DAUGHTER ABOUT HOW THIS WAS INAPPROPRIATE. MY HUSBAND AND I ALSO REPEATED THE LECTURE. HE WAS VERY EMBARRASSED AND CONCERNED WHO WOULD FIND OUT. 6 MONTHS LATER THE SAME EPISODE OCCURRED IN A TENT WITH THIS GIRL AND THIS TIME THEY WERE BOTH NAKED AND SHE LICKED HIS PENIS AND HETOUCHED HER. I AM OUTRAGED. I HAVE HAD NUMEROUS TALKS WITH HIM AND HE SAID HE WONT DO IT AGAIN HE SAID HE DOESNT KNOW WHY HE DOES IT AND HE SAID THAT NO ONE HAS EVER DONE ANYTHING SEXUAL TO HIM . HE HAS 2 THIRTEEN YEAR OLD BROTHERS THAT UNFORTUANATELY HAVE SHOWN HIM MORE MATURE MOVIES/GAMES THAN I WOULD HAVE LIKED. THAT IS NOW NOT OCCURRING ANYMORE-BACK TO BACKYARDAGAINS OR BARNEY. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO . MY TWINS WERE NEVER LIKE THIS. I AM TOTALLY CONFUSED. I DONT SEE A LOT OF REMORSE IN THIS SON HE IS QUITE DEVIOUS AND SMARTER THAN HE SHOULD BE AT THIS AGE. I WORRY A LOT. THERE ALWAYS SEEMED TO BE A LITTLE SOMETHING NOT QUITE RIGHT WITH HIM FROM THE BEGINNING. PEOPLE ALWAYS TOLD ME I WAS JUST SPOILED WITH THE TWINS BECAUSE THEY WERE NO PROBLEM AT ALL AND WITH THE THIRD SON HE JUST DIDNT SEEM TO WANT TO BOND WITH ME I REALLY HAD TO WORK WITH HIM HE JUST  ALWAYS SEEMED A LITTLE OFF - NEVER INTELLECTUALLY BUT EMOTIONALLY. AT 10MONTHS I STOPPED BREAST FEEDING BECAUSE HE BEGAN TO BITE ME AND LAUGH AND EVEN THROUGH READING ALL OF THE BOOKS TO GET HIM TO STOP HE WOULDNT AND WENT TO THE SIPPIE CUP WITH NO PROBLEM. HE WANTED TO TOLIET TRAIN AT 15 MONTHS AND WAS COMPLETELY TRAINED BEFORE 2 NIGHT AND DAY. PEOPLE OFTEN MISTAKE HIM FOR 7 BECAUSE OF HIS ABILITY TO CARRY CONVERSATIONS AND INTELLECT. ANY SUGGESTIONS I WILL DO ANYTHING PLEASE HELP

[Amy521]

Stop typing in all caps.  It is really  hard to read.  Your son may be being sexually abused and hiding it from you because the person sexually abusing him may have bullied him into promising not to tell.  

[elizabeth665]

Maybe boys will turn out differently only time will tell on that, i was the same at that age maybe a little older, again i had seen some things on t.v. i shouldn't have and this led to curiosity. but the other kids he is sharing with are equally as curious and are not being forced, are they? long and short is all i'm left with is a very healthy sex life.

[thesudden]

You need to seek help immediatly. Not to scare you but these are the kind of kids who grow up to be phetophiles or worse.

There is deifinitely emotioal issues going on there and intellignce is irrevelent to that. Its an issue you have to deal with now because it will only get worse. Just becuase he says he hasn't been sexualy abused doesn't mean he hasn't. It's easy for abusive adults to brainwash kids into not telling their parents or a trusted adult about the abuse. If you get him psychological help, you will be able to get to the root of the problem. It is very likely that he was abused and isn't telling you. You have to get him help though, that is not normal behavior. Simply telling him that it is inapropriate isn't enough, yes you should as with anything that is but this is a much bigger issue. Please see it as such and get help for him.

[LRM1021]

I think you have hit the nail on the head here.

He's a bit more advanced than most children his age-- he picks up on things quicker and is growing up a bit faster.
Your older children exposed him to some things that he is mimicking, which is what younger children do.

Stop the exposure, tell him plainly that this is inappropriate, and because he is so smart, you might want to explain why.

If it continues, you should seek help -- but if it does not, sounds like he is ok to me. Smarter kids are harder to handle.