5 y/o boy touching self constantly

[dannigeri]

Over Christmas of 2006, my aunt fell ill and is in a nursing home. I was awarded custody of her (then 4 y/o) boy. From the beginning it became evident that he had a seriuos touching problem. He has his hands on his private part oh I'd say anywhere from 30-60 times per day. I took him to the pediatrition he said there is nothing wrong.

I have asked several dozen parents of boys if any of their children exhibited this behaviour, everyone has said no. We have tried talking to him telling him this is not appropriate behaviour in public places, we have tried smacking his hand to make him aware of how many times he does it, and we have even tried the scare tactic that (if he doesnt stop it will fall off). Nothing slows this down at all.

I have asked other family members and this was a problem long before the emotional turnover and changes that occured.

Any suggestions?

Thanks!

[Tonya1125]

I have two little boys ages five and three and let me tell you...As soon as they relaized that their privates were there, it became a play thing. They are always messing with it. I also worked in the toddler room of a local daycare for two years and almost every boy in the class did the same thing.  It's not anything sexual, I thinks it's just a bad habit. I have noticed that if I keep asking them to stop, the more they do it. I talked to my husband about this problem as well. He explained to me that sometimes it gets a little uncomfortable down there and that boys have to adjust themselves sometimes.  I try not to make a big deal about it unless were in public. If I notice on of my boys messing down there in public, I ask them if they need to go to use the restroom. I'm sorry to hear about your aunt and I think it's a very noble thing you are doing by raising the little boy. He's lucky to have you. Good luck!!

[thorta]

Hi-
I have a son who is 3, going on 4 in March and he is also constantly touching himself.  We try to get him to stop touching himself all the time, the same way you described and it just does not phase him.  I have decided to just not make a big deal about it.  He does not seem to do it as much since I stopped harping on it.  Kids are going to look for attention, negative or positive and if you are making a big deal about it all the time, he may just want your attention and will keep doing it.  Good luck!  

[redneckmom]

Have you tried breaking his habit with another one?  Each time you notice him doing this; give him another action to do.  You could make him wash his hands and explain that just like after going potty if he is going to continue to touch himself all of the time then he has to wash his hands every time.  He may or may not like this, that you know and I don't.  It is easiest to break a habit if you replace it with a new and better one.  Good luck = )

[dannigeri]

Some of the parents said that their children had "self discovery" but not to the extent my boy is having. As I have said I have had the child 1 year. What a way to become a parent. I am only concerned about the 2 +/- years that the daily fondling and playing has occured. I have observed other boys playing and have several cousins and even a brother who never had constant touching problems such as this.

When we say nothing to him he on average will "play" with himself 2-4 hours per day between activities and what not.

[redneckmom]

Several dozen parents have LIED to you LOL.  Some boys are constantly holding on to themselves or "checking" to see if it is still there.  Some boys don't.  Your little one is not a freak because he touches himself.  As long as he is not touching anyone else.  As he gets older he will not want to do this in public; he will learn embarassment on his own.  Please don't smack his hand away; a gentle reminder quietly in his ear should do the trick.  I would really not worry much about this.