6 year old boy

I have 3 boys, 6,4,2. The eldest has always been very good in school and VERY volatile at home. He does not listen to "no" or "stop from siblings or parents and often fights "time outs." I can not force him to go so I take away boy scouts and basketball... no luck there either. At times he is the most helpful and sweetest but it is black and white - his behavior. He is or he isn't. I don't know how to help him.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

It goes without saying that it is very important that children comply with time out. Otherwise they are challenging the jurisdiction of parents. I understand your motivation, but would guide you away from using scouts or basketball as the leverage. However, at the bottom line if that is the leverage you have, so be it. Take a look at Lynn Clark's book SOS Help for Parents, particularly the portion about how to respond to time out refusals (also see sosprograms.com).