6-yr. old crying for no reason

My 6yr old is a very smart, talented, happy and very friendly girl.  All of the sudden (it has been about a month) she has been crying for no reason.  She is watching the clock all the time and asking her caregiver when am I going to pick her up (from summer camp, school, etc.)  When I ask her why does she cry since she knows that I am going to pick her up and I have never left her without doing so, she says that she doesn't know why she cries, that she doesn't want to do so, that she cannot control it and that it is her body.  Even today she said that she didn't like this year's summer camp, but that she likes school, so there is no reason for crying.  I am sad because I don't want to see her suffering for no reason and on the other hand I am concerned since her two grandmothers suffer from depression.  
What can we do to help her?  How should we manage this situation?  Should I take her to a specialist? We are loving parents and we express her love all the time.  We are present in her life in everything... family, school, friends, activities, etc.  Thanks for your help!!!

[margypops]

Could she be bored what does she do at the caregiver's house, do they read play games , are there other children there , something is happening to upset here in my opinion children do not cry without a reason ..I doubt if its depression but if you are concerned a word with the doctor wont hurt .

[RockRose]

You said 4 times in your post that there is no reason for her crying.  

She's sad,  that's why she's crying,  that's the "reason".  

This summer is over that you could have spent with her at home - can you take next summer off so she's at home and not going between summer camps she doesn't like,  or other places she doesn't want to be?  Back in the day,  children had a home during the summer and after school also had a home to come to.  She sounds like one of those sweet sensitive souls who wants a home,  and not a camp or a day care or whathaveyou where she is picked up at the end of the day.

[Sandman2]

   I can remember kids being dropped off at school for kindergarten or first grade, and the tears would start to flow.  And the same thing could also happen when they were picked up.  We never worried about that because usually about 15 min. into the day or half way home, the crying stopped.  And (at least school wise) it never lasted more then about one to two weeks.  We did get very concerned about the child who was still crying two hours or 4 weeks later.  So to me, the key question is, " how long does she cry".  If it ends fairly shorty, it's just her way of telling you she misses you.  Her problem  (hopefully) is that she hasn't learned how to put her emotions into words.  There is a great set of books in the "way I feel series", which help kids do just that.  A good example is, "The way I feel", found here - http://www.amazon.com/Way-I-Feel-Janan-Cain/dp/1884734723/ref=pd_sim_b_7
  And if you scroll down you will find other books like - "When I feel Angry, When I feel Sad, When I miss You," etc.  These will help give her the words she needs and let her know that she is not the only one who is feeling this way.
   And yes, she may wind up telling you that you shouldn't have left her at summer camp - but thats life -- and now the important thing is that you can have a discussion about it.

[Peludis]

During the summer, we went to Hawaii with our neighbors and it didn't matter if she was with her two friends, every time one of us will step away, she was asking "where is daddy?", "where is mommy?".

After school she is in extended day with other kids at the same school and they have activities, so it is not that there is nothing to do.  She was there last year and she was not crying... it is something has developed all of the sudden.

Even she says that she didn't like summer camp, but she likes school and she doesn't understand why she is crying.

[Peludis]

I forgot to explain that she was not in summer camp for the whole summer.  We went to Hawaii with our friends and her kids (for 9 days).  Also, we went to Puerto Rico (7 days).  And, there were occasions that she didn't go to summer camp and went to her granparents house or did stay with her daddy at home, since he has a more flexible work schedule.

Even when one day, when she was at her granparent's, when I arrived, I silently went where she was and she was crying asking my mother-in-law "where is mommy, call her, please, call her".

Before June, she has never ever been like this before.  Not even when she was a baby, she will be sad to be with another person.  She used to wave good bye and be a happy camper.

[margypops]

Then I would find out if anything has happened to upset her, it sounds as if something has, was she alone with any older children or people she didn't know , I don't think children start to behave like this for no reason ....

[Sandman2]

   I agree with margypops, this is a bit unusual.  
Does she stop crying once she is with you (within minutes).   And at school or wherever, is she crying during the day or only when or just before you come to pick her up?

[Peludis]

When she was at this summer camp (different than previous year which she enjoyed), she said that the kids were mean to her and it was not as fun as the other one.

She cries after school, when she stays at extended day program.  And, yes, she stops crying when I pick her up.  Also, one of the ladies that helps in extended day called me and put her on the phone.  After she spoke to me, she stopped crying.

The teacher emailed me today and said that she mentioned this morning that she was missing home.  The teacher suggested her to bring a family photo and put it in her daily binder so she can look at it when she wants to (something that I read in one of many articles I have been reading since yesterday).

Tomorrow, I have an appointment with her pediatrician without her.  Let's see what she has to say.  Praying that this goes away soon and my sunshine is back to her normal and happy life.

[margypops]

The photo idea sounds like a good idea, thats a nice teacher, when you wre on vcation was she away from you much could be a bit of seperation anxiety going on , I expect it will pass.Keep her with you as much as you can for a while .goodluck

[Sandman2]

   Yes, I agree.  the fact she stops crying as soon as you pick her up is a very good sign.  Do look into the books I suggested.  If she finds a way to express herself (other than crying), it will be helpful.

[Peludis]

When we were on vacation with her, we were never away for a long period of time.  It was just going upstairs to get something at our room, or cooking for the kids to bring down to the pool area, but never left her alone.  One of us was always with her.

We are taking her to the pediatrician tomorrow for a series of tests and have found out there is a councelor in the school that might be of help too.

Hoping for the best!!!  Thanks for your suggestions.

[kateyes30]

U might try some counceling..my 9 yr old was doing some of the same things u have mentioned and we actually took him to our family doctor and he suggested letting him try seeing someone..and I was like.." my son does not need counceling...he is not a problem child" but I took him anyway and he has been going now for a year and he loves it...it has helped him tremendously!!! Just meeting once a week helps him to vent, to chat, to get some social skills that was lacking in his life..(since he is a middle child) sometimes it is easier for the child to speak to someone else they can feel comfortable with other than mom and dad.

[ohcalcutagirl]

LET ME VENTURE TO SAY THIS; your child does not need ONE MORE care giver, dr, annalist, play date etc. INSTEAD how about u !
u take the time and be with her
u use your vacation to be with her
ask if she wants to sleep with u AND THEN if yes; do it

and all this will go away on it's own

u say u r a loving family but CAN U IMAGINE ANYONE WHO WOULD SAY OTHER?

so is there tension between u and daddy
is there arguments
r there raised voices
is there structure; time to eat, time for bed, time for play, time for friends OR is it just what ever comes along because u r busy or not organized OR OVER ORGANIZED AS IN u always know where she is because she is with this program or sitter, or etc etc etc.
but not with u

how many kids do u have
it is time for school again what class is she in, how does she get there, who fixes her lunch, who feeds her a snack after school, who eats super with her, who baths her, etc

hope u do well