6 yr old friends

I have a soon to be seven yr old son and a four yr old daughter. My kids have grown up with two boys. One three mos older and the other nine mos younger than my son. At one point in time we all lived in the same house. About two yrs ago, when we all lived together, the oldest boy and my son were caught looking at eachothers privates. We had talked to them and thought the problem had been taken care of. Then we caught them again and this time it was the oldes licking my sons privates. Again we had a talk and told them it is not appropriate and further more kept them from being in the same room together. As time went by we had not seen any sign from any four of the children and chalked it up to curiosity. My fiance and I moved from that house and I continued to have the four children together almost every day durring the week after school. Just recently the boys father has made an accusation that my son has been sexually abusing his younger son. (They are going through divorce). He wants to split his kids up and take one and leave the other. In everyones opinion its for money. He doesn't care and never has for the childrens wellbeing and that's why I always had them in the first place. His accusation is somewhat accuate. We found out all the boys have licked eachother. None say they have been taught or touched by anyone else. But the youngest is saying now after spending time w his dad, that my son made him do it. Please help. Any info will be apriciated on how to ask the childred. I am running out of ideas. Thanks.

[margypops]

I would think a lessen may be learned not to leave children unsupervised so they can behave like this ...The older one should be reprimanded as he is more than likely the instigator.talking wont do anything if you then leave them alone together .,I would think the older child has seen this behavior somewhere else ...

[delkenz]

We have all as parents asked all four about their personal experiences and all have said they have not seen anything or been touched. Believe me we have learned. They are all supervised in the same area when they are together and not aloud to be in bedrooms anymore. I also don't think one should be singled out or blamed as they all were involved. The bedroom rule used to be (since we moved) either all kids go together or one at a time. It is on the second floor and all the toys are there. We thought that would keep them from expirementing. Their mother and I have been friends for over ten yrs. We have explained to them it is not ok and their privates are only theirs and not ok for anybody to see or touch. Id like advice on how to help the kids to understand.