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7 Year Old Has Trouble Making and Keeping Friends

My 7 year old son has been having problems in school making and keeping friends.  He's an active kid, like to play and be goofy.  He doesn't share a lot of the interests of the other boys in his school - namely sports, baseball cards etc.  It seemed like he was starting to make friends with a 2-3 boys, but now he's telling me that they don't like him anymore.  When I question him he tells me that everyone hates him and that when he says hi they  tell him to go away.  He says that nobody is interested in what he is interested in and nobody wants to play the way he does -- all they care about is sports.  I've spoken to his teacher about this issue and she suggested we try and have him develop a friendship with one boy who he seemed to get along with, and that seemed to be working out for a little while, but now, like I mentioned above, apparently this kid no longer likes my son.  My son told me tonight that you can't trust friends, that they only last a week.  He said he finally thought he had one good friend and now he doesn't have that.  This is the first time that he has expressed to me that his lack of friends bothers him.  It's breaking my heart and I'm not sure what to do.  We are having him join Cub Scouts; the first meeting is in a few days and I'm thinking about finding him a therapist that can help with social skills.  

Does anyone have any suggestions?

Thank you.  
2 Responses
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173939 tn?1333217850
I agree with Margy, he will pretty sure work through this himself over time. He probably already feels self-conscious, so keeping the therapist away for now or not to try to fix the situation for him might be best. As long as you listen to him compassionately as you do, he will feel that friendships are a work-in-progress and not something to drop altogether.
At least that is what I can see in my 6-year-old. His interests and play are never of the sports-buddy type. He is happier building his own imaginary worlds and cities or vehicles than shooting another ball and sometimes he gets on his friends` nerves for being too intense or inflexible. He has had sad days when friends backed off for a while. We then play old games together that he even enjoyed playing alone before. That gives him the confidence that he always has himself plus mom if he wants, regardless of friends.

He went through a couple of phases like this and has started to be drawn more to the kids who share "odd" interests or humor as well. Before, some friendships existed for a while, simply because they were neighbors or sat beside each other on the bus. Now there is more of a selection going on.

You can not take away the pain of rejection he feels but always reassure him that life goes on and wonderful friendships arise when nurtured.
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535822 tn?1443976780
I think you have to let him work his way through it by himself if you show too much concern it will cause some anxiety, perhaps dont feed into it , I know you want him to have friends and be popular he will work it out himself, I dont think you can do it for him, and the more you make of it the more it will become. Let him figure it out,its up to you.,
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