7 year old son masturbation

[jen4]

I and my husband are trying to figure out if it is normal for a seven year old child to be pleasuring his self we do not think it is and he dose have a past of sexual abuse we talked to his counselor and she says to let him do it but we do not feel that a child of his age should know how to do it or even know what it is is this normal or not ?

[koukla29]

You could explain appropriate times to do it versus inappropriate - for example in public is inappropriate versus in the privacy of his room or bathroom.  I think the counselor probably said this because you don't want to make him feel guilty about this behavior as it is normal.  He has knowledge at an earlier age because of the abuse.  It is important to explain what is appropriate but not to put too much of an emphasis on this.  Maybe he can get involved in social activities to occupy his time.  Do you have him in any sports, groups, etc?  

[jen4]

thank you no he is not in any sports right now we have been trying to get his  grades up so we put that on the back burn to say but mite try something like that to try and help him in any way we can once again thank you

[singlemom2263]

My son is 5 and also has a masturbation problem.  He is always trying to do it, I have told him if he is doing it to do it when he is by himself.  I have caught him doing it while watching a movie with other kids in the room (under his blanket).  We also have a 6 year old boy, who doesn't have any problems with that.  I don't have any suspisions or knowledge of any sexual abuse in the past.  Is this normal with no abuse in his past?  How do I get him to understand he can't do that around people?  He will be starting kindergarten this year and I am worried.    

[koukla29]

Because of his history of sexual abuse, he is now forced to deal with thoughts  of a sexual nature earlier than most, and he doesn't know how to deal with them at this time.  This is why it is essential to involve him in physical activities, such as sports, to allow him to release the tension he feels.  Since at this age he does not have the emotional maturity or life experience to deal with these thoughts.  I understand that his grades are not good, but this could be due to the fact that he struggles with what has happened to him.  Please consider involving him in a social activity despite his grades.  In addition, this could serve as leverage in getting him to cooperate in raising his grades in the future.

[koukla29]

If you are sure he does not have a history of sexual abuse, he might just be becoming aware of his body.  Try not to emphasize it so much, however, if he does it in public, ask him if he needs to go to the bathroom or go to his room.  

[lxs]

Help.  My 8 year old, soon to be 9, does this also and has for a few years.  He's even been known to use a pencil and the edge of a desk at school.  He is a sweet boy, no sexual abuse, absolutely certain.  I had the same problem when I was his age, but I am a girl so it wasn't so intense. Nothing outside the bedroom.  He doesn't seem to be able to control it.  Is this something that can be helped with medicines for OCD?

[Cosmogal]

Normal! It is perfectly normal. Most of us did this as children too. Just didn't talk about it as much. Now people are so concerned with sexual abuse that it raises so many red flags. Both of my daughters have done that. My son has yet to do that and  he is six. My youngest daughter is 7 and has been doing that since 3. I know its hard to not think the worst but trust me when you talk to other mothers and they are so relieved to find out their child is normal its such a relief. Unless you have other concerns or other red flags don't be in too much a rush to assume sexual abuse. Try to explain the best you can to keep it private.
I read an old forum where someone said that its wrong to masterbate alone and that they should be with someone of the same age to do it with. HOW BIZZARE! Be careful of some weird advice! Like I would ever introduce another child to my child to masterbate! Ridiculous!
Best of luck!
Paula

[jade7080]

i am 13 i have been masterbating (masturbating) since i dont know when may some one plz help me is there something that can happen to me?like a organ problem or something plz help

[rose4199]

No honey nothing can happen to you from masterbating (masturbating). It is normal. A few important things i can tell you are 1. if you use anything on or arround your vigna like lotion, oil... DON'T. it can give you an infection. A good rule to follow is if you wouldnt want to eat it don't put it down there.  you can buy ky jelly at walmart or the drug store for about $8.00    2. if you insert anything into your vigina (vagina) be careful certian items can get stuck and make sure if you use the same item over and over it gets cleaned every time you can use dawn dish washing soap but only the origional blue kind $1.00. Also if you ever do get somthing stuck or it itches tell your mom and if you cant tell her tell your dr right away tell mom you dont feel good and tell the dr when you get in there. they are not aloud to tell your parents if you dont want them to.

[koukla29]

This is not good advice to a 13 year old.  Why would you instruct a 13 year old to buy ky jelly?  This is disgusting.  First of all 13 year olds are not allowed on this website.