CHILD BEHAVIOR COMMUNITY
7 yr old son pulled down pants of 3 yr old

7 yr old son pulled down pants of 3 yr old

Two of my sons were playing at a neighbors house with their 3 yr old. His mom brought them home and said that my older son who is 7 had taken off the little boys shorts and underwear and they were under a blanket together. We asked the little boy if my son touched him and he said no, just that he had taken off his shorts and underwear. I was so embarrassed and angry.  I realize now that I should not have been so mad but he's 7 and he knows better. I've told him that nobody is supposed to do that to him and he is not to do that to anyone else. I think it bothers me most that it was a child smaller then him and who did not know any better. I feel like he was being a predator or something. Now I just don't know what to do. He won't tell me why he did it, he just says he doesn't know. I feel so upset and worried and I just don't know what to do. Please help, I need advice. Is he acting normal or do I need to be as worried as I already am?
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Avatar_m_tn
I don't think it is acceptable behaviour but i also don't think it was deliberate. How can i put this.. i think children have a natural curiosity about their bodies and others also, it's just they don't know it's unacceptable to explore in the way they do. I think in your sons case it was curiousity and exploration instead of something pre-meditated, sexual or predatory. I think your son gave the most logical answer in-line with someone his age ("i don't know") as i don't think he really did know why he did it. In saying that the situation has to be sorted out. I imagine you had a chat with him already which i think is important as he has a younger brother who may think it's ok to copy what big brother does. But i think it would be a good idea to keep him apart from the child next door for a while until trust has been restored. Hope this helped :)
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Avatar_f_tn
I agree with the above post.  Curiosity.  My 8 yr old frequently gives me "I don't know" answers when he feels he is in trouble.  Try not to be angry at him.  Talk to him and let him know he isn't in trouble, but that what he did isn't something he should do.  You may have to go into a little bit of talk about sexuality and such to help him understand that it is okay to be curious, but not okay to do it the way he did.  And then with his little brother you may also want to make sure that he know that is also not okay to do.  
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