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A question about my childhood sexual experimentation

Hi everyone. I have a question about childhood sexual curiousity that I exhibited at a young age.

I cannot pinpoint the exact age that this occurred but I can with confidence that I was 10 years or less because I learned to masturbate at approx 11 and this occurred significantly before it. I once with a vague notion of what sex was decided to go into my sisters room who is 5 years younger and put my penis towards her groin region. Nothing sexual occurred because I didn't understand what the dynamics of sex were and didn't understand what arousal was and wasn't aroused at the time. There was no trickery or force involved or any mutual masturbation in fact I'm pretty certain there was no contact at all. For whatever reason I decided to stop this. My sister must have made a comment to my Mum because she sat me down and discussed that it was inappropriate to have this kind of contact with a family member and I never attempted anything of this nature ever again and have since grown up with typical natural sexuality. The problem is that when this memory resurfaced at about 15ish when I understood the gravitas of what had almost happened, the seeds of guilt that were laid have unfortunately manifested into depression at current age of 25. I understand this isn't the forum to be asking questions relating to adult depression but if you could tell me whether my actions fell within the normal spectrum for childhood sexual experimentation or not then I would be much obliged because it may go someway to helping me resolve these feelings of guilt and self-hatred. Thanks
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5724464 tn?1373121621
I had this just happen with my daughter's half sibling who is 7 and she is 3 and a half. I am currently struggling with how to deal with it. Will she remember this later in life? How do I put my complete trust in her father and I who are not together to stop this from happening again? Do I get her help or is that just making her relive the incident so that she does remember? When she brought it up to me, she was not traumatized, and was just very matter of fact like it was no big deal. I know she has no idea, but I don't want her to get older and to realize what you are just realizing now.

Also, I am petrified that when she goes to her dad's house next, that this may happen again. Ugh.
Helpful - 0
1183485 tn?1307560114
you shold not feel gui;ty about this, i remember playing simular sex imitation games with my bro and friends. theres no shame in it, its just how kids learn, they copy everything. let it go, honestly, dont let such a silly thing affect your adult life. all the best to you x
Helpful - 0
973741 tn?1342342773
Sounds like you saw something when you were a little guy . . . and what you did was the little kid version.  No big deal.  Sounds like no harm was done to either your sister or you.  Let this go-----------  but I will say that you should have your depression treated.  That can make all matters in your life worse and dealing with the depression helps keep all things in perspective.  good luck
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Also forgot to mention that I've had no indication to suggest my sister remembers the incident and we have grown up with a normal sibling relationship.
Helpful - 0
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