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Afraid to Poop on Potty
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Afraid to Poop on Potty

Help!  My 4 1/2 yr. old son refuses to poop on the potty!  I've tried the reward system, sitting him on the potty to change his pull up, you name it!  Still to no avail he refuses to poop on the potty.  Plus, even though he is potty trained to pee pee at the potty he refuses to use the potty at his preschool completely!  Thank goodness he is there for only 2 1/2 hrs. a day but he will begin kindergarten this fall and I'm concerned about his toilet training issues!  What to do - any suggestions are appreciated!
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I just replied to your other post about your son not wanting to grow up "despite" being such a smart kid...and I almost mentioned that my son went through a phase when he refused the potty as well. It often goes hand in hand with not wanting to grow up yet or wanting to maintain control in an area that can not be controlled by anyone else, like BMs. There are all kinds of little tricks to entice late bloomers to use the potty like the reward chart you already tried but I found that kids pick up on those tricks and only realize that much more how important the issue is for their parents. I forced myself to treat the whole issue really casual and the day came my son whole-heartedly wanted to be a big boy and use the toilet. There can be a lot of reasons, psychological or physical like encopresis - and if it persists after age 5 they recommend seeing a child psychologist - but combined with your other post, I assume your little guy just doesn`t want to be fully grown up at the moment.
By the way. at some point I realized that my son was experimenting with the timing of having to go and the feeling of urgency. He would rather go in his pants than going to the washroom too early. We made it a fun game to race to the washroom and we also practiced going to public washrooms and in nature. Four-year-olds don`t know how to ask these things. And something else: my son hated the cold feeling of the potty or the
regular toilet. So a padded kiddie toilet seat with handles on top of the regular toilet gave him more comfort, with a step stool for those dangling legs.
With some patience he will hopefully be one step ahead soon.
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