Anger Management

[Thunderbird]

I have an 8 1/2 yr old grandson whose father committed suicide last year.  Since that time he does not talk about his father.  He gets extremely angry very easily  when corrected and becomes violent, hitting kicking biting and screamming.  He does not do this at school or at other childrens homes but at home or at my house.  He has a brother 6yrs old and constantly picks at him.  He seems to think he should be allowed to make his own decisions and refuses to listen.  The smaller child does talk about him father at times.  These two boys have been in councelling, one on one and group for about 9 months.  This does not seem to be helping.  We have just placed the older on in councelling with a psychologist but I need to be able to cope with him at home. Any information you could give me would be greatly appreciated.

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

When children are acting in an aggressive, oppositional and defiant manner, therpay should include a plan for behavior management at home. It would make sense for your grandson's mother to speak with the therapist about this, and ask for some guidance. A systematic plan can be developed, which his mother and you can implement in your respective homes. Environmental treatment, as well as office-based therapy, is recommended for children who display the sorts of symptoms you describe.